Post by MadStepDad on Sept 10, 2012 8:51:41 GMT -5
Cut to the in-studio announce team for the evening:
Gordon Solie & Matt Striker
Broadcasting from an undisclosed location in San Francisco... this is XPW Remixed TV presents: "Thesz vs Santel"! In addition, we celebrate pro wrestling's first gimmick match - "the tag team bout" - with some exciting matches on tap! Stay tuned!
__________________________________________________________________
** A WORD FROM THE COMPANY (intro) **
XPW Remixed president ED “STRANGLER” LEWIS from the podium, like a presidential speech… he formally introduces and hypes the XPW World championship match later tonight between Thesz & Santel… in addition, a special caveat has been added: a “coaches challenge” to occur tonight between two teams of Thesz & Santel… this bout will prove who the better wrestling mind is - the main event will settle the better wrestling body… the incentive being - whoever wins the coaches challenge - will get to name the Stipulation of tonight’s main event championship bout! Stay tuned, and enjoy the show!
** CUT TO RING **
** Coaches Challenge **
USO’s (w/ Ad Santel) versus
SEVERN & YOUNGER (w/ Thesz)
w/
versus
w/
The first chapter in our 2-part championship competition tonight... Santel leads his well-oiled tag team combination to victory, and a small measure of retribution against the team that defeated them in the "Best of 7 Series" last year... commentators cover the match history and build anticipation for tonights main event... Severn remains a beast in the ring, when not overtaken by temper - and Younger takes a collection of Xtreme, new age bumps... but the Uso switcheroo results in twin top rope splashes to Drake for the pin. Santel earns further coaching bragging rights and momentum going into the championship bout tonight...
Winners: USO's
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Rob Black (with right hand legal consigliore Jack Pfefer) in discussion with his Black Army troops… they finally own the KotDM title and scene in XPW Remixed - and soon enough that will bleed into further title contention… Dean Ambrose demands a title shot for himself, but Rob Black needs him to do another quick Black Army *favor* first…
____________________________________________________________
HAKUSHI versus JUN KASAI (w/ Onita)
versus w/
Caught somewhere between the worlds of light and dark, Hakushi has turned to a shades of gray character with his rebellion against evil Atsushi Onita… Hakushi is a ninja assassin anti-hero who is now getting fan pops for his ill assortment of martial arts moves because he’s targeting bad guys with them… in this case - former stable mate and fellow brainwashed goon JUN KASAI… a rematch ordered by Commissioner Muldoon as atonement for their skills - and demanded by Onita to extract revenge against Hakushi… commentators discuss the mystical and forbidden codes of honor, respect and sacrifice that drive this Far East feud (instilling an importance in the bouts outcome, beyond simple title aspirations)… this is a sacred blood feud - and Hakushi helps turn it into a holy bloodbath with his decimation of Jun Kasai (who never the less continues to come off as the insane, maniacal, Death Match warrior he is)… the real loser here is Onita - who lets his fiery Far East temper and ego take over and winds up accidentally sabotaging Kasai when a weapons scenario goes awry… Kasai takes the top rope freefall through a table (taped with light tubes) - Onita takes the GREEN MIST to the face from Hakushi - who finishes Kasai with a top rope moonsault onto the death and debris…
Winner: HAKUSHI
(Post match - Hakushi is attacked from behind by DEAN AMBROSE! The firmly-cemented Black Army leader stomps him down until Onita recovers enough to join the assault himself... Onita & Ambrose double team Hakushi and spike him to the mat with a double powerbomb through steel chairs to regain their criminal heel heat and put over the Devil-may-care, violent attitude of the Black Army...)
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Intrepid backstage correspondent MSD and cameras catch #1 contender AD SANTEL (and troops) exiting the office of XPW Remixed VP Joseph “Toots” Mondt and there is clear collusion between the two… a connection between the *hit* Santel performed on Thesz last week - and the title shot he got this week… Ad Santel has a few harsh threats for Thesz tonight - and officially announces the main event will be a SUBMISSION MATCH! “The Cali Crippler” Ad Santel will break Thesz tonight!
XPW World title SUBMISSION MATCH!
Tonight!!
** CUT **
_______________________________________________________________
JINDER MAHAL & DAMIEN SANDOW (w/ Wild Red Berry)
versus
ROB VAN DAM… & WEEDMAN!!
w/ vs.
Brief meeting of the minds backstage with Mahal & Sandow (w/ Berry) coming to a gentleman’s agreement… both despise RVD and agree XPW Remixed needs a new TV champion (Mahal because he believes RVD is a P.E.D. using cheat - and Sandow concurs, adding RVD is a drug-using ignoramus)… match was ordered by Commissioner Muldoon last episode, with RVD promising to find a partner… after Mahal & Sandow (w/ Berry) enter - RVD the XPW Remixed Television champion gets the big entrance to introduce his partner… WEEDMAN! Greatest entrance in pro wrestling history commences - bad guys are enraged and insulted - until Weedman & RVD light up the tandem tag team offense that is part Air Dog 4:20 / part High times = all awesome… proving they are no joke. After a succession of quick moves executed upon Mahal, Damien Sandow & Berry suddenly decide so they are so disgusted and *above* this trivial nonsense - they actually abandon Mahal’s tag and leave the building with their noses in the air! Jinder Mahal is left behind to get run through like the Red Line and snuffed out in the middle of the mat like a blunt roach… 5-Star frogsplash from RVD for 3 - and cue the plant-puffing, crowd-pleasing victory celebration outro…
Winners: RVD 4:20 & WEEDMAN
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Taz & Samoa Joe jump and attack MIZ backstage…
** ABRUPT CUT **
__________________________________________________________________
”REAL DEAL” DAMIEN STEELE versus
w/
versus
w/
The first chapter in our 2-part championship competition tonight... Santel leads his well-oiled tag team combination to victory, and a small measure of retribution against the team that defeated them in the "Best of 7 Series" last year... commentators cover the match history and build anticipation for tonights main event... Severn remains a beast in the ring, when not overtaken by temper - and Younger takes a collection of Xtreme, new age bumps... but the Uso switcheroo results in twin top rope splashes to Drake for the pin. Santel earns further coaching bragging rights and momentum going into the championship bout tonight...
Winners: USO's
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Rob Black (with right hand legal consigliore Jack Pfefer) in discussion with his Black Army troops… they finally own the KotDM title and scene in XPW Remixed - and soon enough that will bleed into further title contention… Dean Ambrose demands a title shot for himself, but Rob Black needs him to do another quick Black Army *favor* first…
____________________________________________________________
HAKUSHI versus JUN KASAI (w/ Onita)
versus w/
Caught somewhere between the worlds of light and dark, Hakushi has turned to a shades of gray character with his rebellion against evil Atsushi Onita… Hakushi is a ninja assassin anti-hero who is now getting fan pops for his ill assortment of martial arts moves because he’s targeting bad guys with them… in this case - former stable mate and fellow brainwashed goon JUN KASAI… a rematch ordered by Commissioner Muldoon as atonement for their skills - and demanded by Onita to extract revenge against Hakushi… commentators discuss the mystical and forbidden codes of honor, respect and sacrifice that drive this Far East feud (instilling an importance in the bouts outcome, beyond simple title aspirations)… this is a sacred blood feud - and Hakushi helps turn it into a holy bloodbath with his decimation of Jun Kasai (who never the less continues to come off as the insane, maniacal, Death Match warrior he is)… the real loser here is Onita - who lets his fiery Far East temper and ego take over and winds up accidentally sabotaging Kasai when a weapons scenario goes awry… Kasai takes the top rope freefall through a table (taped with light tubes) - Onita takes the GREEN MIST to the face from Hakushi - who finishes Kasai with a top rope moonsault onto the death and debris…
Winner: HAKUSHI
(Post match - Hakushi is attacked from behind by DEAN AMBROSE! The firmly-cemented Black Army leader stomps him down until Onita recovers enough to join the assault himself... Onita & Ambrose double team Hakushi and spike him to the mat with a double powerbomb through steel chairs to regain their criminal heel heat and put over the Devil-may-care, violent attitude of the Black Army...)
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Intrepid backstage correspondent MSD and cameras catch #1 contender AD SANTEL (and troops) exiting the office of XPW Remixed VP Joseph “Toots” Mondt and there is clear collusion between the two… a connection between the *hit* Santel performed on Thesz last week - and the title shot he got this week… Ad Santel has a few harsh threats for Thesz tonight - and officially announces the main event will be a SUBMISSION MATCH! “The Cali Crippler” Ad Santel will break Thesz tonight!
XPW World title SUBMISSION MATCH!
Tonight!!
** CUT **
_______________________________________________________________
JINDER MAHAL & DAMIEN SANDOW (w/ Wild Red Berry)
versus
ROB VAN DAM… & WEEDMAN!!
w/ vs.
Brief meeting of the minds backstage with Mahal & Sandow (w/ Berry) coming to a gentleman’s agreement… both despise RVD and agree XPW Remixed needs a new TV champion (Mahal because he believes RVD is a P.E.D. using cheat - and Sandow concurs, adding RVD is a drug-using ignoramus)… match was ordered by Commissioner Muldoon last episode, with RVD promising to find a partner… after Mahal & Sandow (w/ Berry) enter - RVD the XPW Remixed Television champion gets the big entrance to introduce his partner… WEEDMAN! Greatest entrance in pro wrestling history commences - bad guys are enraged and insulted - until Weedman & RVD light up the tandem tag team offense that is part Air Dog 4:20 / part High times = all awesome… proving they are no joke. After a succession of quick moves executed upon Mahal, Damien Sandow & Berry suddenly decide so they are so disgusted and *above* this trivial nonsense - they actually abandon Mahal’s tag and leave the building with their noses in the air! Jinder Mahal is left behind to get run through like the Red Line and snuffed out in the middle of the mat like a blunt roach… 5-Star frogsplash from RVD for 3 - and cue the plant-puffing, crowd-pleasing victory celebration outro…
Winners: RVD 4:20 & WEEDMAN
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Taz & Samoa Joe jump and attack MIZ backstage…
** ABRUPT CUT **
__________________________________________________________________
”REAL DEAL” DAMIEN STEELE versus
RICARDO RODRIGUEZ
(“Tuxedo Match” for the right to become Del Rio’s assistant”)
versus
The climax of multiple threads tonight… Steele’s beat down revenge tour, his mini-angle with Rodriguez and the *END* of somebody’s XPW Remixed career as well… angle itself is sidebar humor to Alberto Del Rio’s dead serious World title chase… ever since Del Rio’s arrival, Damien Steele (former company commissioner, now reduced to barely-employed laughingstock) was angling to position himself as Del Rio’s personal assistant… instead he was shocked and mortified (not to mention angry) to learn Ricard Rodriguez had accompanied Del Rio to XPW Remixed! So began the hilarious vignettes of Steele trying to get Ricardo replaced… finally - in the wake of Del Rio’s championship loss to Thesz (see “DI2”) - he angrily issued this match ultimatum… whoever wins will become Del Rio’s personal assistant… but not just any match - it must be the humiliating and demeaning tuxedo match… which is an excuse for a few minutes of low brow comedy…
Winner: RICARDO RODRIGUEZ
Steele winds up stripped to his speedos and loses to Rodriguez… after the match Del Rio had a backstage skit with XPW Remixed VP Joseph “Toots” Mondt who kind of laughingly addressed the situation and alluded to Del Rio becoming a bit of joke… which only spurred Del Rio to cut a cold, vicious promo promising great evil and treachery enroute to retaining his spot as XPW Remixed World champion… these angry, vindictive threats were met with a smirk of cool manipulation from Mondt who continues to stir the pot backstage… Del Rio even had a brief face-to-face vignette with his UNCLE Mil Mascaras on his way out of the building in a huff (their first time meeting in XPW Remixed) - in which Mascaras spoke to him in Spanish about the dishonor he has brought the family and how he doesn't even deserve a World title rematch with his actions... you can imagine Del Rio's reaction to that...
Meanwhile, a few days later news broke the wrestling underground wire: Damien Steele took a 2-story fall out a window in Puerto Rico that resulted in 18 cranial and facial fractures, 3 tibial fractures, optic nerve cupping, torn meniscus and LCL as well as multiple contusions and lacerations on the face chest shoulders and arms. Huh. Steele never wrestled again. In traditional XPW Remixed fashion - humor quickly turns to horror…
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
JOHN CENA (w/ Paul Bowser) and XPW Remixed commissioner William Muldoon! Shared history and respect between the two and Cena gives Muldoon props for doing a good job in such a sea of anarchy… it's now "everyman for himself", fastest gun in the West rules... Muldoon’s advice to Cena is take the Joe/Taz union threat seriously and focus on the #1 Contendership… Cena’s advice to Muldoon is to end the uncertainty around Tommaso Ciampa desertion because it’s wearing on his constituents … Cena & Muldoon end with the handshake of mutual respect and vow to watch each others backs…
** CUT **
_____________________________________________________________________
"The #1 Contender"
In XPW Remixed - the cycles of past, present and future come together in spherical form. The beginning and the ending - it creates a place where we respect the shooters and hookers… with that in mind - XPW Remixed proudly presents to you, America’s first Mixed Martial artist…
AD SANTEL
"The Cali Crippler of XPW Remixed"
Background
Born Adolph Ernst in 1887 (from Germany none the less - you can see why his stage name would become “Ad Santel”) - Santel was a practitioner of catch wrestling, one of it’s most physical and taxing forms… some of the earliest reports of his matches were all exceptional. The "Lincoln Evening News" (1/9/1912) called Ernst (not yet “Santel”) "easily one of the most skillful wrestlers in America. He worked before three Lincoln audiences last year and displayed a greater variety of locks and holds than any wrestler in the game." Much like others of his ilk (and a product of their time), Ernst toured with a vaudeville group but found it too fanciful for his tastes. Ad Santel was a real wrestling champion. He was seriously considered one of the top light heavyweight wrestlers on the planet.
****
A World Championship Claim
According to the January 27, 1913 edition of the Wichita Daily Times (Wichita Falls, TX), Adolph Ernst based his claim to the World Light Heavyweight championship “upon the defeat he administered to Dmitral at Woodward, Oklahoma, on January 14. He secured the first fall in twelve minutes and the second in two minutes and ten seconds (remember - back in the day championship bouts were contested in 2 out of 3 falls matches). Ernst is 26 years old, a native of Germany; he weighs 175 pounds and would be a straight heavyweight if he were five pounds heavier.”
****
A Cripplers Legend
Wrestling swerves, “hits” and bone-breakers are nothing new in wrestling history - but XPW Remixed has a habit of shining the light on those dark, shady and unsavory places… one of those mythological “hits” came in 1911 in the build-up to the epic Gotch vs. Hackenschmidt rematch… Ad Santel (still operating under various assumed aliases) was a training partner in Hackenschmidt’s camp - and gave his expert direction on catch wrestling from the coach position… but little did Hackenschmidt suspect - Santel had been paid a cool $5k (that’s like 5 MILLION today) by Gotch’s camp to make sure the Russian Lion never made it to the match… Santel did a number on Hackenschmidt’s knee, and the big guy wound up jobbing out to Gotch in the championship bout… all because of the deadly actions of a remorseless shooter… Ad Santel would go on to run the San Francisco wrestling scene - and even had a match lined up against Frank Gotch in 1916... But for some reason, Gotch withdrew from the match and it never happened…
****
O.G. of MMA
The early 1900s were the golden age of pro wrestling's legitimate lineage. Top grapplers made their bones on the carnival circuit, handling local toughs, and fought for higher stakes against other elite catch stylists known as "hookers." While the likes of Georg Hackenschmidt and Frank Gotch wrestled over heavyweight supremacy - Ad Santel ruled the realm of Light Heavyweight… meanwhile - judo diaspora was underway - and many of the original founders students traveled abroad to spread knowledge of "the gentle way."
One such traveler was Tokugoro Ito, a fifth dan black belt from the Kodokan. Ito left Japan in 1907 and landed in Seattle (starting his own dojo)… but as was VERY common back then (and a MAJOR recurring theme of XPW Remixed) - pro rasslin paid more money, so Ito settled within that realm as well… he toured up and down the Pacific coast territory alongside such early MMA/rasslin luminaries as Mitsuyo Maeda (see “Broken City Championship Wrestling”) calling himself the “World Judo champion“… that was Ito‘s wrestling gimmick… as was his destiny - the pro wrestling circuit took Ito to San Francisco CA USA in 1916… Ad Santel country…
Santel was already claiming to be the World Wrestling Light heavyweight champion… and he engaged Ito in one of the first “style vs. style” (or “MMA”) bouts… When Santel and Ito met on Feb. 5, 1916, Santel emerged victorious after thumping Ito's head off the floor to take a TKO win (picture a young Frank Shamrock powerslamming Igor Zinoviev). With his victory, Santel *took* Ito’s title & gimmick and proclaimed HIMSELF the world's top judoka! The following year he traveled to Seattle to challenge the transplanted judoka of the Seattle Dojo. On Oct. 20, he had a rematch against Taro Miyake, with whom he had drawn the previous year. The Seattle Daily Times wrote that Santel half-nelson slammed Miyake "so hard that the Japanese had dizzy spells for half an hour after the fall." Two weeks later, Santel took fourth dan Daisuke Sakai out in two falls, submitting him both times with short-arm scissors, more contemporarily known as a bicep slicer. Santel's feud with judo came to a head in March 1921, when he traveled to Japan and publicly challenged the Kodokan (think DX driving a tank up to WCW Towers). While the Kodokan frowned on professional matchups involving its current students and ordered them not to participate, it didn't stop their judoka from accepting the challenge. On March 5 at the Yasukuni Shrine, Santel took on fifth dan Reijiro Nagata, whom he slammed for a TKO. The following day, in a captivating hour-long battle, he grappled to a draw with another fifth dan, Hikoo Shoji. But the point had been made - Santel was an absolute beast.
****
Road to XPW Remixed
In wrestling lore, Ad Santel is said to be a major influence and coach to a young Lou Thesz… but in the upside down world of XPW Remixed - Ad Santel debuted as a treacherous, backstabbing heel (similar to the role he played in the Gotch/Hackenshmidt fiasco)… in this case, he wooed Thesz’ handpicked fantasy wrestling successor B-Boy to join his West Coast cali cripplers camp and betray Lou… B-Boy accepted and his betrayal set off an epic Cali Cripplers (w/ Ad Santel) versus Shooters Club (w/ Lou Thesz) feud that climaxed in the first “Best of 7 Series” in company history… though Santel’s team was defeated (and he *lost* his world judo champion claim to Masahiko Kimura in the war) he proved his methods were no joke… suffering from a broken arm in his fight with Kimura, Santel had a brief run with the arm cast gimmick (ala Cowboy Bob Orton) as he coached his Cali Cripplers team (including West Coast luminaries the Uso brothers & Tamina) from ringside… Ad Santel returned to solo action and defeated Miz in a classic “Sportz vs. Entertainment” clash before being upset by Mildred Burke in a War Games match (see “Scene of the Crime”)… Santel voraciously denied ever tapping out to Mildred Burke in that match, despite footage to the contrary… none the less after much controversy and debate, he accepted a match with Burke and *beat* her by submission (see XPW TV Episode #50)… however, eager to overcompensate for that feud (and still steaming over the Best of 7 series loss) - Ad Santel made the shocking decision to execute another wrestling “hit”… this time his target was the XPW Remixed World champion (and former protégé/turned/rival) Lou Thesz - who he attacked at the end of XPW TV Episode #51... Santel is a dangerous crippler, hooker and shooter who knows all of Lou Thesz’ secrets and weaknesses… like a pitbull with lockjaw, or a shark entering its feeding frenzy - once Santel gets a hold, he’s not breaking until it’s broke off… Mash-Up Wrestling beware… the O.G. of MMA has a bone to pick with you…
** XPW Remixed WORLD Championship **
LOU THESZ © versus AD SANTEL
versus
Only on XPW TV Episode #52 (Thesz vs. Santel)!!
****
Actual Newspaper Account of an Ad Santel victory
“Ad Santel Too Scientific”
(Truth – December 29, 1927)
As wrestling matches go nowadays, the grappling contest between Ad Santel (13.2), light-heavyweight champion of the world and the New Zealand champion, Walter Hogg (14.7) at Cessnock, near Newcastle, last week must be accounted a respectable affair.
In one of the rounds Hogg bit Santel and on another occasion kicked him in the chest.
Santel, however, slightly evened matters by pushing Hogg’s face into the mat.
Apart from these little pleasantries, the bout, which was won by Santel by two falls to none was a most interesting exhibition.
Though Santel was successful, it was only his greater knowledge of the fine points of the game that enabled him to triumph.
Hogg is a magnificent specimen of manhood, and is possessed of phenomenal strength.
For the first two rounds Santel had a busy time withstanding the efforts of the big fellow to pin him to the mat, and it was apparent that the contest was going to turn into one of science versus strength.
In the third round, however, Santel began to assert himself, and get busy with holds that bothered the big New Zealander. It was sheer strength alone that enabled the Maorilander to break free from some of the grips that Santel put on him.
In the fifth round Santel put a combination head and headlock on Hogg and gained a fall.
The sixth round was a sensational period. Hogg made an attempt to put the Boston grab hold on Santel, and although he didn’t succeed, Santel had a narrow escape, and it was only by remarkably clever movement that he managed to break free.
The succeeding rounds were strenuous, Santel, who is as clean a wrestler as ever entered the ring, showed on at least one occasion that he is a dangerous man to practise rough-house tactics on.
Excitement prevailed early in the sixth round, when Santel put the splits on the Maorilander.
Hogg managed to escape from this predicament, but almost immediately Santel tied him up with a front body scissors and arm lock.
This time Hogg failed to get free, and Santel gained another fall, thus winning the bout, which was refereed by Joe Shakespeare.
****
** Interview with the XPW Remixed WORLD champion **
MSD: People are billing tonight’s main event as “Shooter vs. Hooker”… care to elaborate on the difference between the two?
LOU THESZ: There were only five hookers that I know of who wrestled actively - Karl Gotch, Billy Robinson, myself, Ray Steele and Ad Santel. There were others who had the ability to be hookers if they had wanted it badly enough…
MSD: Now the success of Ad Santel’s cobra-kai MMA/wrestling school in San Francisco has given rise to the term “ripper”…
LOU THESZ I think of a ripper as somebody who would head butt his opponent…. A hooker could apply the hook to become a ripper if he needed and do pretty vicious damage… The objective however was to "convince" his opponent to submit.
MSD: So “hooking” could be considered a form of advanced catch grappling/MMA technique? And does that cross-over sit well with you?
LOU THESZ: A hooker also had to have the mind set to avoid the hooks of his opponent and the more hooks you had in your "store" the more you had a chance of getting on your opponent. Martial arts has become such a broad, even crossover, term and "hooking" is melding into it. I am delighted to see it happen. It would be a shame to waste such skill and knowledge of combat. At my age, I’m even learning new hooks and moves.
MSD: Tonight’s main event is an example of a true fantasy wrestling match-up… how do you think you compare to Santel - a man who mentored and molded you into the champion you are today?
LOU THESZ: While this is an interesting exercise for the imagination, I want to mention Ad Santel, a middle weight, who was invited to Japan to wrestle. He beat everyone in such fast order, the Japanese had no more work for him. He had spent his money and could not afford a ticket home, so we wrangled an invitation into the martial arts world. When he trained for a few weeks with them, beat them all - and I do mean all weights, classes and styles - the martial arts group bought his ticket back to the States to "save face". Ad Santel was the most versatile opponent I ever saw. His mind was "programmed" for combat of any form. He had speed and courage beyond any other. What he lacked was ambition for the spotlight. His motivation was truly love of the competition. Ad was dangerous because it was a game to him. Wrestling/hooking was his total focus.
MSD: To what do you credit your success, and do you have plans to compete in any further fantasy wrestling dream bouts - win lose or draw?
LOU THESZ: My success was due to the era and the men who befriended me. The world was changing for professional wrestling and I was prepared for both sides of the game. Tragos was not going to compromise his wrestling principal's for anyone, so he taught me to defend myself in a contest. Ed and Ray could see the handwriting on the wall for professional wrestling so they prepared me for the business end of protecting myself.
MSD: So as a shoot for the World championship you feel confident in your skills… and you think Santel could handle any one of these modern day warriors? Anybody else?
LOU THESZ: What I am trying to tell you is, my skills were not kept sharp enough for the likes of George or Ad (I didn't have the luxury of that kind of time on the road), but I would put my money on either of them in a level contest with today's warriors. Ed “Strangler” Lewis would have been a good bet too, just because he was a tree - impossible to fell.
MSD: Thank you for your time and good luck tonight, champ.
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
MSD is getting a few words from superstar agent (and legendary Boston-area promoter) Paul Bowser RE: his client John Cena’s title quest - and the return of his client MCMG from injury… when they are violently interrupted by the destructive tandem of TAZ & SAMOA JOE! The two thugs perform a wrestling “hit” on Bowser - attacking the untrained promoter and locking him in the Tazzmission! They quickly destroy him - intimidate MSD into fleeing - and wreck the office - then close with a few up-close shoot comments for Cena, Thesz, Muldoon and others “in power” before knocking the cameras into static…
A new union takes seige of XPW Remixed!
** CUT **
_____________________________________________________________________
TRISH STRATUS & WENDI RICHTER
versus
NATALYA NEIDHART & JASMIN ST CLAIRE
versus
XPW Remixed Woman’s champion Trish Stratus & Wendi Richter are a tag team dynamo made in fantasy wrestling history - and ripe for prime time ratings (which their segments always clearly deliver)… Neidhart is professional foil of course, but how did Jasmin St Claire get this TV opportunity? There are some girls that will do *anything* to be in the spotlight, and that’s Jasmin’s character in XPW Remixed… she treats the “match” more as an opportunity to get face time on camera, and lets Natalya do all the work… Niedhart holds her own but takes all the bumps for Stratus & Richter who get all their crowd-pleasing spots off in quick succession… finally Nattie has enough - force tags St Claire (who clearly didn’t plan on actually *competing* tonight) and let her get killed… flying bulldog from Trish ends the match definitively… chalk another one up for the baby faces tonight as “girls just wanna have fun” is the theme… until the dark, sobering strains of AWESOME KONG’S theme song start playing and the arena goes near-black! Kong storms the ring - seemingly ready to confront Stratus AND Richter head on… but only breaks down into maniacal laughter at ringside… her psyche out move leaves Stratus & Richter puzzled and wary - while Kong just hungrily stares them down from ringside and moves backwards up the entrance ramp… Awesome Kong is still in the title picture, and is starving for a rematch… will Trish deliver??
Winners: TRISH STRATUS & WENDI RICHTER
Awesome Kong still haunts the XPW Remixed woman's title scene.
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Down on their luck former cohorts Matt Morgan (w/ Buddy Rogers) and Alex Riley (w/ girlfriend Missy Hyatt) are arguing amongst themselves as to who is to blame for the dissolution of their once-mighty union (they both take some verbal shots below the belt)... Alex Riley has a gentleman's proposal to end their disagreement... but Morgan *SNAPS* in response! He turns from gentleman to insane animal, tossing Riley about backstage and powerbombing him through a table! SCREW being a "gentleman"... Matt Morgan is a BEAST and he wants an XPW Title shot!!
"The Blueprint" is a beast.
** CUT **
______________________________________________________________________
SAMI CALLIHAN vs. MADMAN PONDO vs.
(“Tuxedo Match” for the right to become Del Rio’s assistant”)
versus
The climax of multiple threads tonight… Steele’s beat down revenge tour, his mini-angle with Rodriguez and the *END* of somebody’s XPW Remixed career as well… angle itself is sidebar humor to Alberto Del Rio’s dead serious World title chase… ever since Del Rio’s arrival, Damien Steele (former company commissioner, now reduced to barely-employed laughingstock) was angling to position himself as Del Rio’s personal assistant… instead he was shocked and mortified (not to mention angry) to learn Ricard Rodriguez had accompanied Del Rio to XPW Remixed! So began the hilarious vignettes of Steele trying to get Ricardo replaced… finally - in the wake of Del Rio’s championship loss to Thesz (see “DI2”) - he angrily issued this match ultimatum… whoever wins will become Del Rio’s personal assistant… but not just any match - it must be the humiliating and demeaning tuxedo match… which is an excuse for a few minutes of low brow comedy…
Winner: RICARDO RODRIGUEZ
Steele winds up stripped to his speedos and loses to Rodriguez… after the match Del Rio had a backstage skit with XPW Remixed VP Joseph “Toots” Mondt who kind of laughingly addressed the situation and alluded to Del Rio becoming a bit of joke… which only spurred Del Rio to cut a cold, vicious promo promising great evil and treachery enroute to retaining his spot as XPW Remixed World champion… these angry, vindictive threats were met with a smirk of cool manipulation from Mondt who continues to stir the pot backstage… Del Rio even had a brief face-to-face vignette with his UNCLE Mil Mascaras on his way out of the building in a huff (their first time meeting in XPW Remixed) - in which Mascaras spoke to him in Spanish about the dishonor he has brought the family and how he doesn't even deserve a World title rematch with his actions... you can imagine Del Rio's reaction to that...
Meanwhile, a few days later news broke the wrestling underground wire: Damien Steele took a 2-story fall out a window in Puerto Rico that resulted in 18 cranial and facial fractures, 3 tibial fractures, optic nerve cupping, torn meniscus and LCL as well as multiple contusions and lacerations on the face chest shoulders and arms. Huh. Steele never wrestled again. In traditional XPW Remixed fashion - humor quickly turns to horror…
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
JOHN CENA (w/ Paul Bowser) and XPW Remixed commissioner William Muldoon! Shared history and respect between the two and Cena gives Muldoon props for doing a good job in such a sea of anarchy… it's now "everyman for himself", fastest gun in the West rules... Muldoon’s advice to Cena is take the Joe/Taz union threat seriously and focus on the #1 Contendership… Cena’s advice to Muldoon is to end the uncertainty around Tommaso Ciampa desertion because it’s wearing on his constituents … Cena & Muldoon end with the handshake of mutual respect and vow to watch each others backs…
** CUT **
_____________________________________________________________________
"The #1 Contender"
In XPW Remixed - the cycles of past, present and future come together in spherical form. The beginning and the ending - it creates a place where we respect the shooters and hookers… with that in mind - XPW Remixed proudly presents to you, America’s first Mixed Martial artist…
AD SANTEL
"The Cali Crippler of XPW Remixed"
Background
Born Adolph Ernst in 1887 (from Germany none the less - you can see why his stage name would become “Ad Santel”) - Santel was a practitioner of catch wrestling, one of it’s most physical and taxing forms… some of the earliest reports of his matches were all exceptional. The "Lincoln Evening News" (1/9/1912) called Ernst (not yet “Santel”) "easily one of the most skillful wrestlers in America. He worked before three Lincoln audiences last year and displayed a greater variety of locks and holds than any wrestler in the game." Much like others of his ilk (and a product of their time), Ernst toured with a vaudeville group but found it too fanciful for his tastes. Ad Santel was a real wrestling champion. He was seriously considered one of the top light heavyweight wrestlers on the planet.
****
A World Championship Claim
According to the January 27, 1913 edition of the Wichita Daily Times (Wichita Falls, TX), Adolph Ernst based his claim to the World Light Heavyweight championship “upon the defeat he administered to Dmitral at Woodward, Oklahoma, on January 14. He secured the first fall in twelve minutes and the second in two minutes and ten seconds (remember - back in the day championship bouts were contested in 2 out of 3 falls matches). Ernst is 26 years old, a native of Germany; he weighs 175 pounds and would be a straight heavyweight if he were five pounds heavier.”
****
A Cripplers Legend
Wrestling swerves, “hits” and bone-breakers are nothing new in wrestling history - but XPW Remixed has a habit of shining the light on those dark, shady and unsavory places… one of those mythological “hits” came in 1911 in the build-up to the epic Gotch vs. Hackenschmidt rematch… Ad Santel (still operating under various assumed aliases) was a training partner in Hackenschmidt’s camp - and gave his expert direction on catch wrestling from the coach position… but little did Hackenschmidt suspect - Santel had been paid a cool $5k (that’s like 5 MILLION today) by Gotch’s camp to make sure the Russian Lion never made it to the match… Santel did a number on Hackenschmidt’s knee, and the big guy wound up jobbing out to Gotch in the championship bout… all because of the deadly actions of a remorseless shooter… Ad Santel would go on to run the San Francisco wrestling scene - and even had a match lined up against Frank Gotch in 1916... But for some reason, Gotch withdrew from the match and it never happened…
****
O.G. of MMA
The early 1900s were the golden age of pro wrestling's legitimate lineage. Top grapplers made their bones on the carnival circuit, handling local toughs, and fought for higher stakes against other elite catch stylists known as "hookers." While the likes of Georg Hackenschmidt and Frank Gotch wrestled over heavyweight supremacy - Ad Santel ruled the realm of Light Heavyweight… meanwhile - judo diaspora was underway - and many of the original founders students traveled abroad to spread knowledge of "the gentle way."
One such traveler was Tokugoro Ito, a fifth dan black belt from the Kodokan. Ito left Japan in 1907 and landed in Seattle (starting his own dojo)… but as was VERY common back then (and a MAJOR recurring theme of XPW Remixed) - pro rasslin paid more money, so Ito settled within that realm as well… he toured up and down the Pacific coast territory alongside such early MMA/rasslin luminaries as Mitsuyo Maeda (see “Broken City Championship Wrestling”) calling himself the “World Judo champion“… that was Ito‘s wrestling gimmick… as was his destiny - the pro wrestling circuit took Ito to San Francisco CA USA in 1916… Ad Santel country…
Santel was already claiming to be the World Wrestling Light heavyweight champion… and he engaged Ito in one of the first “style vs. style” (or “MMA”) bouts… When Santel and Ito met on Feb. 5, 1916, Santel emerged victorious after thumping Ito's head off the floor to take a TKO win (picture a young Frank Shamrock powerslamming Igor Zinoviev). With his victory, Santel *took* Ito’s title & gimmick and proclaimed HIMSELF the world's top judoka! The following year he traveled to Seattle to challenge the transplanted judoka of the Seattle Dojo. On Oct. 20, he had a rematch against Taro Miyake, with whom he had drawn the previous year. The Seattle Daily Times wrote that Santel half-nelson slammed Miyake "so hard that the Japanese had dizzy spells for half an hour after the fall." Two weeks later, Santel took fourth dan Daisuke Sakai out in two falls, submitting him both times with short-arm scissors, more contemporarily known as a bicep slicer. Santel's feud with judo came to a head in March 1921, when he traveled to Japan and publicly challenged the Kodokan (think DX driving a tank up to WCW Towers). While the Kodokan frowned on professional matchups involving its current students and ordered them not to participate, it didn't stop their judoka from accepting the challenge. On March 5 at the Yasukuni Shrine, Santel took on fifth dan Reijiro Nagata, whom he slammed for a TKO. The following day, in a captivating hour-long battle, he grappled to a draw with another fifth dan, Hikoo Shoji. But the point had been made - Santel was an absolute beast.
****
Road to XPW Remixed
In wrestling lore, Ad Santel is said to be a major influence and coach to a young Lou Thesz… but in the upside down world of XPW Remixed - Ad Santel debuted as a treacherous, backstabbing heel (similar to the role he played in the Gotch/Hackenshmidt fiasco)… in this case, he wooed Thesz’ handpicked fantasy wrestling successor B-Boy to join his West Coast cali cripplers camp and betray Lou… B-Boy accepted and his betrayal set off an epic Cali Cripplers (w/ Ad Santel) versus Shooters Club (w/ Lou Thesz) feud that climaxed in the first “Best of 7 Series” in company history… though Santel’s team was defeated (and he *lost* his world judo champion claim to Masahiko Kimura in the war) he proved his methods were no joke… suffering from a broken arm in his fight with Kimura, Santel had a brief run with the arm cast gimmick (ala Cowboy Bob Orton) as he coached his Cali Cripplers team (including West Coast luminaries the Uso brothers & Tamina) from ringside… Ad Santel returned to solo action and defeated Miz in a classic “Sportz vs. Entertainment” clash before being upset by Mildred Burke in a War Games match (see “Scene of the Crime”)… Santel voraciously denied ever tapping out to Mildred Burke in that match, despite footage to the contrary… none the less after much controversy and debate, he accepted a match with Burke and *beat* her by submission (see XPW TV Episode #50)… however, eager to overcompensate for that feud (and still steaming over the Best of 7 series loss) - Ad Santel made the shocking decision to execute another wrestling “hit”… this time his target was the XPW Remixed World champion (and former protégé/turned/rival) Lou Thesz - who he attacked at the end of XPW TV Episode #51... Santel is a dangerous crippler, hooker and shooter who knows all of Lou Thesz’ secrets and weaknesses… like a pitbull with lockjaw, or a shark entering its feeding frenzy - once Santel gets a hold, he’s not breaking until it’s broke off… Mash-Up Wrestling beware… the O.G. of MMA has a bone to pick with you…
** XPW Remixed WORLD Championship **
LOU THESZ © versus AD SANTEL
versus
Only on XPW TV Episode #52 (Thesz vs. Santel)!!
****
Actual Newspaper Account of an Ad Santel victory
“Ad Santel Too Scientific”
(Truth – December 29, 1927)
As wrestling matches go nowadays, the grappling contest between Ad Santel (13.2), light-heavyweight champion of the world and the New Zealand champion, Walter Hogg (14.7) at Cessnock, near Newcastle, last week must be accounted a respectable affair.
In one of the rounds Hogg bit Santel and on another occasion kicked him in the chest.
Santel, however, slightly evened matters by pushing Hogg’s face into the mat.
Apart from these little pleasantries, the bout, which was won by Santel by two falls to none was a most interesting exhibition.
Though Santel was successful, it was only his greater knowledge of the fine points of the game that enabled him to triumph.
Hogg is a magnificent specimen of manhood, and is possessed of phenomenal strength.
For the first two rounds Santel had a busy time withstanding the efforts of the big fellow to pin him to the mat, and it was apparent that the contest was going to turn into one of science versus strength.
In the third round, however, Santel began to assert himself, and get busy with holds that bothered the big New Zealander. It was sheer strength alone that enabled the Maorilander to break free from some of the grips that Santel put on him.
In the fifth round Santel put a combination head and headlock on Hogg and gained a fall.
The sixth round was a sensational period. Hogg made an attempt to put the Boston grab hold on Santel, and although he didn’t succeed, Santel had a narrow escape, and it was only by remarkably clever movement that he managed to break free.
The succeeding rounds were strenuous, Santel, who is as clean a wrestler as ever entered the ring, showed on at least one occasion that he is a dangerous man to practise rough-house tactics on.
Excitement prevailed early in the sixth round, when Santel put the splits on the Maorilander.
Hogg managed to escape from this predicament, but almost immediately Santel tied him up with a front body scissors and arm lock.
This time Hogg failed to get free, and Santel gained another fall, thus winning the bout, which was refereed by Joe Shakespeare.
****
** Interview with the XPW Remixed WORLD champion **
MSD: People are billing tonight’s main event as “Shooter vs. Hooker”… care to elaborate on the difference between the two?
LOU THESZ: There were only five hookers that I know of who wrestled actively - Karl Gotch, Billy Robinson, myself, Ray Steele and Ad Santel. There were others who had the ability to be hookers if they had wanted it badly enough…
MSD: Now the success of Ad Santel’s cobra-kai MMA/wrestling school in San Francisco has given rise to the term “ripper”…
LOU THESZ I think of a ripper as somebody who would head butt his opponent…. A hooker could apply the hook to become a ripper if he needed and do pretty vicious damage… The objective however was to "convince" his opponent to submit.
MSD: So “hooking” could be considered a form of advanced catch grappling/MMA technique? And does that cross-over sit well with you?
LOU THESZ: A hooker also had to have the mind set to avoid the hooks of his opponent and the more hooks you had in your "store" the more you had a chance of getting on your opponent. Martial arts has become such a broad, even crossover, term and "hooking" is melding into it. I am delighted to see it happen. It would be a shame to waste such skill and knowledge of combat. At my age, I’m even learning new hooks and moves.
MSD: Tonight’s main event is an example of a true fantasy wrestling match-up… how do you think you compare to Santel - a man who mentored and molded you into the champion you are today?
LOU THESZ: While this is an interesting exercise for the imagination, I want to mention Ad Santel, a middle weight, who was invited to Japan to wrestle. He beat everyone in such fast order, the Japanese had no more work for him. He had spent his money and could not afford a ticket home, so we wrangled an invitation into the martial arts world. When he trained for a few weeks with them, beat them all - and I do mean all weights, classes and styles - the martial arts group bought his ticket back to the States to "save face". Ad Santel was the most versatile opponent I ever saw. His mind was "programmed" for combat of any form. He had speed and courage beyond any other. What he lacked was ambition for the spotlight. His motivation was truly love of the competition. Ad was dangerous because it was a game to him. Wrestling/hooking was his total focus.
MSD: To what do you credit your success, and do you have plans to compete in any further fantasy wrestling dream bouts - win lose or draw?
LOU THESZ: My success was due to the era and the men who befriended me. The world was changing for professional wrestling and I was prepared for both sides of the game. Tragos was not going to compromise his wrestling principal's for anyone, so he taught me to defend myself in a contest. Ed and Ray could see the handwriting on the wall for professional wrestling so they prepared me for the business end of protecting myself.
MSD: So as a shoot for the World championship you feel confident in your skills… and you think Santel could handle any one of these modern day warriors? Anybody else?
LOU THESZ: What I am trying to tell you is, my skills were not kept sharp enough for the likes of George or Ad (I didn't have the luxury of that kind of time on the road), but I would put my money on either of them in a level contest with today's warriors. Ed “Strangler” Lewis would have been a good bet too, just because he was a tree - impossible to fell.
MSD: Thank you for your time and good luck tonight, champ.
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
MSD is getting a few words from superstar agent (and legendary Boston-area promoter) Paul Bowser RE: his client John Cena’s title quest - and the return of his client MCMG from injury… when they are violently interrupted by the destructive tandem of TAZ & SAMOA JOE! The two thugs perform a wrestling “hit” on Bowser - attacking the untrained promoter and locking him in the Tazzmission! They quickly destroy him - intimidate MSD into fleeing - and wreck the office - then close with a few up-close shoot comments for Cena, Thesz, Muldoon and others “in power” before knocking the cameras into static…
A new union takes seige of XPW Remixed!
** CUT **
_____________________________________________________________________
TRISH STRATUS & WENDI RICHTER
versus
NATALYA NEIDHART & JASMIN ST CLAIRE
versus
XPW Remixed Woman’s champion Trish Stratus & Wendi Richter are a tag team dynamo made in fantasy wrestling history - and ripe for prime time ratings (which their segments always clearly deliver)… Neidhart is professional foil of course, but how did Jasmin St Claire get this TV opportunity? There are some girls that will do *anything* to be in the spotlight, and that’s Jasmin’s character in XPW Remixed… she treats the “match” more as an opportunity to get face time on camera, and lets Natalya do all the work… Niedhart holds her own but takes all the bumps for Stratus & Richter who get all their crowd-pleasing spots off in quick succession… finally Nattie has enough - force tags St Claire (who clearly didn’t plan on actually *competing* tonight) and let her get killed… flying bulldog from Trish ends the match definitively… chalk another one up for the baby faces tonight as “girls just wanna have fun” is the theme… until the dark, sobering strains of AWESOME KONG’S theme song start playing and the arena goes near-black! Kong storms the ring - seemingly ready to confront Stratus AND Richter head on… but only breaks down into maniacal laughter at ringside… her psyche out move leaves Stratus & Richter puzzled and wary - while Kong just hungrily stares them down from ringside and moves backwards up the entrance ramp… Awesome Kong is still in the title picture, and is starving for a rematch… will Trish deliver??
Winners: TRISH STRATUS & WENDI RICHTER
Awesome Kong still haunts the XPW Remixed woman's title scene.
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Down on their luck former cohorts Matt Morgan (w/ Buddy Rogers) and Alex Riley (w/ girlfriend Missy Hyatt) are arguing amongst themselves as to who is to blame for the dissolution of their once-mighty union (they both take some verbal shots below the belt)... Alex Riley has a gentleman's proposal to end their disagreement... but Morgan *SNAPS* in response! He turns from gentleman to insane animal, tossing Riley about backstage and powerbombing him through a table! SCREW being a "gentleman"... Matt Morgan is a BEAST and he wants an XPW Title shot!!
"The Blueprint" is a beast.
** CUT **
______________________________________________________________________
SAMI CALLIHAN vs. MADMAN PONDO vs.
THE MESSIAH
(Triple Threat Xtreme Rulez match)
versus versus
Piggybacking off the ladies ratings bonanza, is the Hour 2 lead-off “Xtreme Rulez” bout (“Xtreme Rulez” for the most part being a lighter, TV-rated version of the typical XPW Remixed “Death Match”)… again - typically one of the highest rated segments which is why they are so prevalent on XPW TV… in this case - the remnants of the once mighty (but now dismantled) CZWO (“Combat Zone Wrestling Originals”) are forced to do battle - gladiatorial pit style - by their captor, defeater and company minority owner ROB BLACK… Messiah & Callihan’s feud - turned partnership - has completely imploded as commentators cover the arc of that storyline thread (including abandonment’s, betrayals and “ghost sightings”)… MadMan Pondo has been reduced to his savage base elements - just looking to make somebody (mostly himself) bleed profusely… Callihan & Messiah perform unconscious team work to eliminate Pondo - before finally killing themselves… Rob Blacks fingerprints are all over this match as the commentators discuss his tyrannical rule and bizarre business decisions... contest quickly turns into one-upsmanship between Messiah & Sami Callihan - with each upping the ante... but when it comes down to it... Sami apparently still harbors some of that old CZWO "respect" - because he refuses to slay former comrade Madman Pondo permenently when he gets the chance... but not Messiah. He swoops in to drop Pondo through the death trap of tables, glass, tacks and fire - proving his violence knows no limititations... Messiah & Callihan stare bloody daggers through each other to end the segment...
Winner: THE MESSIAH
** CUT **
__________________________________________________________________
** DARK MATCHES **
A segment that puts over cut matches in fast, MTV-styled, video hype clips - usually set to some kind of heavy metal or Hip Hop background music.. this is the kind of stuff that would have appeared on the now-dormant XPW Online, or within the 3rd hour of XPW TV that has been lost...
John Morrison def. Ruckus
(shake hands post match)
Rocky Romero def Ricky Reyes
(Romero cheats 2 win over former Pitbulls partner)
Sable def. Annie Social in a grudge match
(Sable continues to call out Trish Stratus for a title shot)
Generation ME def. Kendrick & London & PG-13
(Tag Team triple threat)
(PG-13 interjected to get themselves included - wound up crushed by London/Kendrick - but sneak pinned by GenME)
Kaos (w/ Titus O’Neil) def. Human Tornado
(entertainment match that still gets both acts over)
Mark Henry def. Alex Riley (w/ Missy Hyatt)
(Squash match)
Sandman & Necro Butcher def. New Jack in handicap match
(Violence as Sandman & Necro continue to spread their "anti-hardcore" message)
** King of the Death Match **
Kilo © def. Thumbtack Jack
(Violence climax - and another great example of Vic Grimes "big man vs little man" match formula... brutal, bloody and barbaric... and ironic that despite Thumbtack Jack's Death Match career - it is a mundane wrestling move (hurricanrana counter) that breaks his spine and forces his retirement. ThumbtacK Jack will never wrestle again)
**Dark Match Main Event **
LOD def. Bull Ramos & Pogo the Clown
(Unbelievable doomsday device on Ramos - the Bull & Pogo wind up brawling amongst themselves post match)
** CUT **
______________________________________________________________________
THE MOVEMENT versus
(Triple Threat Xtreme Rulez match)
versus versus
Piggybacking off the ladies ratings bonanza, is the Hour 2 lead-off “Xtreme Rulez” bout (“Xtreme Rulez” for the most part being a lighter, TV-rated version of the typical XPW Remixed “Death Match”)… again - typically one of the highest rated segments which is why they are so prevalent on XPW TV… in this case - the remnants of the once mighty (but now dismantled) CZWO (“Combat Zone Wrestling Originals”) are forced to do battle - gladiatorial pit style - by their captor, defeater and company minority owner ROB BLACK… Messiah & Callihan’s feud - turned partnership - has completely imploded as commentators cover the arc of that storyline thread (including abandonment’s, betrayals and “ghost sightings”)… MadMan Pondo has been reduced to his savage base elements - just looking to make somebody (mostly himself) bleed profusely… Callihan & Messiah perform unconscious team work to eliminate Pondo - before finally killing themselves… Rob Blacks fingerprints are all over this match as the commentators discuss his tyrannical rule and bizarre business decisions... contest quickly turns into one-upsmanship between Messiah & Sami Callihan - with each upping the ante... but when it comes down to it... Sami apparently still harbors some of that old CZWO "respect" - because he refuses to slay former comrade Madman Pondo permenently when he gets the chance... but not Messiah. He swoops in to drop Pondo through the death trap of tables, glass, tacks and fire - proving his violence knows no limititations... Messiah & Callihan stare bloody daggers through each other to end the segment...
Winner: THE MESSIAH
** CUT **
__________________________________________________________________
** DARK MATCHES **
A segment that puts over cut matches in fast, MTV-styled, video hype clips - usually set to some kind of heavy metal or Hip Hop background music.. this is the kind of stuff that would have appeared on the now-dormant XPW Online, or within the 3rd hour of XPW TV that has been lost...
John Morrison def. Ruckus
(shake hands post match)
Rocky Romero def Ricky Reyes
(Romero cheats 2 win over former Pitbulls partner)
Sable def. Annie Social in a grudge match
(Sable continues to call out Trish Stratus for a title shot)
Generation ME def. Kendrick & London & PG-13
(Tag Team triple threat)
(PG-13 interjected to get themselves included - wound up crushed by London/Kendrick - but sneak pinned by GenME)
Kaos (w/ Titus O’Neil) def. Human Tornado
(entertainment match that still gets both acts over)
Mark Henry def. Alex Riley (w/ Missy Hyatt)
(Squash match)
Sandman & Necro Butcher def. New Jack in handicap match
(Violence as Sandman & Necro continue to spread their "anti-hardcore" message)
** King of the Death Match **
Kilo © def. Thumbtack Jack
(Violence climax - and another great example of Vic Grimes "big man vs little man" match formula... brutal, bloody and barbaric... and ironic that despite Thumbtack Jack's Death Match career - it is a mundane wrestling move (hurricanrana counter) that breaks his spine and forces his retirement. ThumbtacK Jack will never wrestle again)
**Dark Match Main Event **
LOD def. Bull Ramos & Pogo the Clown
(Unbelievable doomsday device on Ramos - the Bull & Pogo wind up brawling amongst themselves post match)
** CUT **
______________________________________________________________________
THE MOVEMENT versus
COLT CABANA & MCMG [return!!]
w/
versus
Started with the MOVEMENT (led by Rashad Cameron) approaching and accusing Commissioner Muldoon of RACISM (based upon his decision to ban Rashad Cameron’s posse from ringside during his TV title match, amongst other things)… leads to this match against the reinvented, everyman favorite Colt “Boom Boom” Cabana (2012) and the RETURNING (from injury to Sabin) MOTOR CITY MACHINE GUNS! They come back guns blazing and we have an exciting 6-man free for all with constant motion and no rest holds.. But the trickery, deceit, street smarts (and +1 man advantage) of the Movement put them over the top and Cabana gets pinned after a BLKJeez double foot stomp off the top… everybody stays looking tough with the Movement just displaying an extra level of heel compliance… Movement give their NOD-like “salute” to end the match and segment…
Winners: THE MOVEMENT
________________________________________________________________
"A Loss of Focus"
Cameras catch an argument in the Focus locker room between David Otunga and Gorgeous George Wagner (still hiding his bald head under multiple humorous wig-types)... David Otunga is fired from being Gorgeous George's agent but Gorgeous George is dropped from Focus... poor little GG (the mindless piece of ass-candy) doesn't know which way to go... next week on XPW TV - Gorgeous George Wagner vs David Otunga! Winner keeps the "Focus" brand-name and logo (and gets the token girl too)!
David Otunga vs Gorgeous George for the rights to "FOCUS"
Who will wind up with GG's services??
Tune in to the next XPW TV Episode to find out!!
** CUT **
_______________________________________________________________________
DUDLEY BOYZ © vs
w/
versus
Started with the MOVEMENT (led by Rashad Cameron) approaching and accusing Commissioner Muldoon of RACISM (based upon his decision to ban Rashad Cameron’s posse from ringside during his TV title match, amongst other things)… leads to this match against the reinvented, everyman favorite Colt “Boom Boom” Cabana (2012) and the RETURNING (from injury to Sabin) MOTOR CITY MACHINE GUNS! They come back guns blazing and we have an exciting 6-man free for all with constant motion and no rest holds.. But the trickery, deceit, street smarts (and +1 man advantage) of the Movement put them over the top and Cabana gets pinned after a BLKJeez double foot stomp off the top… everybody stays looking tough with the Movement just displaying an extra level of heel compliance… Movement give their NOD-like “salute” to end the match and segment…
Winners: THE MOVEMENT
________________________________________________________________
"A Loss of Focus"
Cameras catch an argument in the Focus locker room between David Otunga and Gorgeous George Wagner (still hiding his bald head under multiple humorous wig-types)... David Otunga is fired from being Gorgeous George's agent but Gorgeous George is dropped from Focus... poor little GG (the mindless piece of ass-candy) doesn't know which way to go... next week on XPW TV - Gorgeous George Wagner vs David Otunga! Winner keeps the "Focus" brand-name and logo (and gets the token girl too)!
David Otunga vs Gorgeous George for the rights to "FOCUS"
Who will wind up with GG's services??
Tune in to the next XPW TV Episode to find out!!
** CUT **
_______________________________________________________________________
DUDLEY BOYZ © vs
HEATH SLATER & HONKY TONK MAN
versus
Reigning XPW Remixed tag team champions the DUDLEY BOYZ take the ring for a promo… they put over XPW Remixed as being hallowed ground, and blessed to be competing here… real heavy duty, “respect the game” parlance from the “greatest tag team in fantasy wrestling history”… on the flipside of the coin, the Dudz are aware of the criticism that they didn’t *earn* their tag team title shot… and they want to prove they belong here and are fighting champions… the Dudz call out former champions (and thorough-bred Un-Americans) the FABULOUS KANGAROOS… but instead of the Aussie nightmares, they get… sweet Southern rock??
Enter HEATH SLATER & HONKY TONK MAN
More “I’m too good for this dump” banter from Slater & HTM (despite the fact they haven’t won a match in forever) that winds up getting them crucified and slain by the tag team deity Dudley Boyz in a quick 2-on-2 squash match… HTM has his guitar but the fans want tables, and the Dudz are happy to oblige… Heath Slater winds up getting the guitar busted over his head and 3D’d for good effect…
Winners: DUDLEY BOYZ
(but before Slater can be driven through the table… Slater is rescued by the FabKangs! Al Costello pulls Slater’s body off the table - the manager Wild Red Berry distracts them with ringside banter - and Heffernan pushes D-Von Dudley off the top turnbuckle… in an impressive display of power and tag team chemistry, the FabKangs wind up hoisting big Bubba Ray Dudley into their improvised DWI finish - power bombing him through his own table! The utter disrespect! FabKangs make a statement and Wild Red Berry gives it the official stamp - FabKangs vs. Dudley Boyz in a tag team title rematch at “The 18th Letter”!!)
** XPW Remixed tag team titles **
Dudley Boyz (2009) © versus Fabulous Kangaroos (1960)
Only @ "The 18th Letter" iPPV!!
** CUT **
_________________________________________________________________________
"A Cross-Over Classic"
Classic XPW Remixed-style clusterfuck that always winds up flowing together perfectly… this segment starts with the TV entrance of Mildred Burke & Strikeforce 135lb champion “Rowdy” Ronda Rousey… Burke is coming up to the END of her year-long contractual prison! Come October 1st she will once again be legally able to compete against other women! And the FIRST person Mildred Burke wants to call out is… AWESOME KONG! That big bully has gone on terrifying the XPW Remixed woman’s division for too long… Kong isn’t the best female wrestler on the planet… Trish Stratus isn’t either… MILBRED BURKE IS! And to prove that - we conclude with her open challenge to any male in the locker room tonight… but her call to action is instead answered by…
LIZZY BORDEN??
The evil porn temptress (and ex-Womans division pres who signed away Burke’s contractual freedom to begin with) interrupts with snotty arrogance and catty jealousy… but her barbed words are just a set-up and distraction… after goading Rousey into a shoving match (both her and Lizzy tumbling from the ring) - Mildred Burke is blindsided by SHANE DOUGLAS! The current XPW Remixed Boston champion is noticeably larger than Burke and quickly embarrasses her - dropping her right on her head with a Pittsburgh Plunge for the *pin*…
Winner: SHANE DOUGLAS
”The Franchise” of XPW Remixed has the mic for another unscripted *shoot* promo - he’s still feeling slighted and disrespected by the lack of attention he’s receiving from XPW Remixed match-makers, so he keeps stealing his own segments - hence his interruption and schooling (shout out to Dean Douglas) of Mildred Burke. Shane Douglas would just like to remind you of a WOMAN’S PLACE in this great sport! His filthy porn valet Lizzy Borden agrees and has some profanity-laced words for Burke & Rousey… nobody can beat SHANE DOUGLAS! NOBODY! He is the leader of the Revolution here in XPW Remixed, and his camp just got bigger… just then he’s interrupted by a familiar theme song…
Enter SHEAMUS (2012)!
Classic Irish-mobster style, especially with his newfound wealth (see “DI2”)… “Nobody can beat Shane Douglas”?? SHEAMUS BEAT SHANE DOUGLAS! Even disbanding his original crew of XPW Remixed flunkies! Now - with a little greasing of the right palm (toots mondt) - Sheamus gets another chance to prove that claim… a championship chance… Sheamus vs. Shane Douglas for the Boston championship! NOW!
Crowd pops! Shane Douglas freaks out and starts begging off! Rowdy Ronda Rousey streaks in to the ring and tackles Lizzy Borden; mounting and pummeling her! She quickly snaps Borden into a devastating ARM BAR! Shane Douglas is agog, but as he moves towards them - he is charged from behind by a Mildred Burke dropkick! Douglas & Borden tumble from the ring! Sheamus joins alongside Burke & Rousey to form a fan-favorite triumvirate! We’ve got a Boston championship match NEXT! Stay tuned!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
** XPW Boston championship **
SHANE DOUGLAS (2002) © w/ Lizzy Borden versus
versus
Reigning XPW Remixed tag team champions the DUDLEY BOYZ take the ring for a promo… they put over XPW Remixed as being hallowed ground, and blessed to be competing here… real heavy duty, “respect the game” parlance from the “greatest tag team in fantasy wrestling history”… on the flipside of the coin, the Dudz are aware of the criticism that they didn’t *earn* their tag team title shot… and they want to prove they belong here and are fighting champions… the Dudz call out former champions (and thorough-bred Un-Americans) the FABULOUS KANGAROOS… but instead of the Aussie nightmares, they get… sweet Southern rock??
Enter HEATH SLATER & HONKY TONK MAN
More “I’m too good for this dump” banter from Slater & HTM (despite the fact they haven’t won a match in forever) that winds up getting them crucified and slain by the tag team deity Dudley Boyz in a quick 2-on-2 squash match… HTM has his guitar but the fans want tables, and the Dudz are happy to oblige… Heath Slater winds up getting the guitar busted over his head and 3D’d for good effect…
Winners: DUDLEY BOYZ
(but before Slater can be driven through the table… Slater is rescued by the FabKangs! Al Costello pulls Slater’s body off the table - the manager Wild Red Berry distracts them with ringside banter - and Heffernan pushes D-Von Dudley off the top turnbuckle… in an impressive display of power and tag team chemistry, the FabKangs wind up hoisting big Bubba Ray Dudley into their improvised DWI finish - power bombing him through his own table! The utter disrespect! FabKangs make a statement and Wild Red Berry gives it the official stamp - FabKangs vs. Dudley Boyz in a tag team title rematch at “The 18th Letter”!!)
** XPW Remixed tag team titles **
Dudley Boyz (2009) © versus Fabulous Kangaroos (1960)
Only @ "The 18th Letter" iPPV!!
** CUT **
_________________________________________________________________________
"A Cross-Over Classic"
Classic XPW Remixed-style clusterfuck that always winds up flowing together perfectly… this segment starts with the TV entrance of Mildred Burke & Strikeforce 135lb champion “Rowdy” Ronda Rousey… Burke is coming up to the END of her year-long contractual prison! Come October 1st she will once again be legally able to compete against other women! And the FIRST person Mildred Burke wants to call out is… AWESOME KONG! That big bully has gone on terrifying the XPW Remixed woman’s division for too long… Kong isn’t the best female wrestler on the planet… Trish Stratus isn’t either… MILBRED BURKE IS! And to prove that - we conclude with her open challenge to any male in the locker room tonight… but her call to action is instead answered by…
LIZZY BORDEN??
The evil porn temptress (and ex-Womans division pres who signed away Burke’s contractual freedom to begin with) interrupts with snotty arrogance and catty jealousy… but her barbed words are just a set-up and distraction… after goading Rousey into a shoving match (both her and Lizzy tumbling from the ring) - Mildred Burke is blindsided by SHANE DOUGLAS! The current XPW Remixed Boston champion is noticeably larger than Burke and quickly embarrasses her - dropping her right on her head with a Pittsburgh Plunge for the *pin*…
Winner: SHANE DOUGLAS
”The Franchise” of XPW Remixed has the mic for another unscripted *shoot* promo - he’s still feeling slighted and disrespected by the lack of attention he’s receiving from XPW Remixed match-makers, so he keeps stealing his own segments - hence his interruption and schooling (shout out to Dean Douglas) of Mildred Burke. Shane Douglas would just like to remind you of a WOMAN’S PLACE in this great sport! His filthy porn valet Lizzy Borden agrees and has some profanity-laced words for Burke & Rousey… nobody can beat SHANE DOUGLAS! NOBODY! He is the leader of the Revolution here in XPW Remixed, and his camp just got bigger… just then he’s interrupted by a familiar theme song…
Enter SHEAMUS (2012)!
Classic Irish-mobster style, especially with his newfound wealth (see “DI2”)… “Nobody can beat Shane Douglas”?? SHEAMUS BEAT SHANE DOUGLAS! Even disbanding his original crew of XPW Remixed flunkies! Now - with a little greasing of the right palm (toots mondt) - Sheamus gets another chance to prove that claim… a championship chance… Sheamus vs. Shane Douglas for the Boston championship! NOW!
Crowd pops! Shane Douglas freaks out and starts begging off! Rowdy Ronda Rousey streaks in to the ring and tackles Lizzy Borden; mounting and pummeling her! She quickly snaps Borden into a devastating ARM BAR! Shane Douglas is agog, but as he moves towards them - he is charged from behind by a Mildred Burke dropkick! Douglas & Borden tumble from the ring! Sheamus joins alongside Burke & Rousey to form a fan-favorite triumvirate! We’ve got a Boston championship match NEXT! Stay tuned!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
** XPW Boston championship **
SHANE DOUGLAS (2002) © w/ Lizzy Borden versus
SHEAMUS (2012)
w/ versus
When we return from commercial Douglas is working on Sheamus with neck vices and chin locks as the commentators cover their rivalry (see “(Another) New Years Revolution”)… Lizzy Borden is selling her arm at ringside as Rousey’s cross over union with Burke is promoted… Sheamus fires back - hits his succession of moves - but before he can hit the Brogue Kick.. He’s bum rushed from behind! Two men hit the ring to blindside Sheamus and stomp him down, in full flagrant view of the ref! Ring the bell! Sheamus wins by DQ but Douglas keeps the belt!
Winner (by DQ): SHEAMUS
The two attackers are none other than “ROCKSTAR” JOEY KAOS (with “I beat Austin Aries” written across the back of his custom T-shirt) and his Primetime Playaz tag team partner TITUS O’NEIL!! The PtP both wear a version of Shane’s “Revolution” T-shirt! This must be new union Shane alluded to! His mentorship of the next era of fantasy wrestlers! PtP & Shane Douglas destroy Sheamus and pose (w/ Borden) flaunting their Revolution colors to end the segment…
PtP join the Revolution! MILLIONS OF DOLLARS! MILLIONS OF DOLLARS!
** CUT **
________________________________________________________________
”The Scene”
Starts with XPW Commissioner William Muldoon recapping his fallout with pupil Tommaso Ciampa in somber tones… he can’t move forward as a professional until this matter is resolved - and calls out Ciampa to iron out their differences right now…
TOMMASO CIAMPA appears (to moderate boos) - stone cold expressionless, with a stark blond goatee - shades of Viper Randy Orton meets Hollywood Hogan… as expected, Ciampa is sick of playing second-fiddle to Muldoon and being known simply as an Olympia underling… he demands Muldoon play favorites with his Commissioner position and assign Tommaso a title match… this is the first time Ciampa has broken his silence since this angle started… before Commissioner Muldoon can rebut him - we are interrupted by a familiar theme song..
Enter Phil “Gunner” Shatter (2013) and Jessica Darlin (2001)!!
Gunner is bigger and thicker than everybody in the ring and shakes them all down accordingly.. Big bully swagger from Gunner who has ditzy Jessica Darlin hanging on every word and action… Commissioner Muldoon finally speaks up for himself and raises Gunner’s ire - but of course the big, bad, muscle-bound Gunner won’t confront the aging, yet still tough as nails XPW commissioner to his face… he waits till Muldoon turns to confer with Ciampa (ostensibly to make a one-on-one match between him and Gunner next) - before blindsiding Muldoon from the rear with a huge double-ax handle sledge! Gunner attacks Muldoon from behind and lays waste to him in the middle of the ring! Meanwhile Ciampa just STANDS there watching! Gunner hit’s a devastating F5 onto William Muldoon! These attacks on authority figures are raging out of control since Rob Black came in, Solie rants on commentary! ANOTHER F5 from Gunner to Muldoon! Now he is about to set up a THIRD F5 - onto a steel chair produced by Darlin - when young Olympia rep and former XPW Remixed woman’s champion ALEXXIS NEVAEH makes the desperate run-in!
She covers her coaches body with her own, begging Gunner to show remorse… but Gunner’s angry face turns to one of sick, happy perversion at the sudden thought of getting his hands on her… Darlin cheers him on to crush her as well! Alexxis is pleading with her former stablemate Tommaso Ciampa to *DO* something to save their coach - but he does NOTHING! Instead, Ciampa turns his head and walks away! He’s leaving up the entrance ramp! There’s nothing stopping Gunner now, and he GRABS Alexxis by her throat and hoists her up into F5 position! He’s gonna KILL the girl! Suddenly - like a Patriot missile shot from a cannon - a savior bolts to the ring:
JOHN CENA!!
He BURSTS past Tommaso Ciampa on the entrance ramp (nearly knocking him down to get past him) - hits the ring - brawls with Gunner - reverses into an FUAA, driving Gunner from the ring for good - and rescues Alexxis Nevaeh! John Cena is the knight riding in on the white steed to save the girl and protect Olympia honor! Hustle, loyalty, respect and GUNNER & CIAMPA HAVE NONE!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
_____________________________________________________________________
We're back from commercial for an in-ring promo from John Cena (a continuation of the past segment and segue to the next)… Cena is sick of the politics, pandering and violent anarchy that is besieging XPW Remixed (and therefore fantasy wrestling as a whole, because XPW Remixed is the best)… he made a vow when he came here to stand for Hustle, Loyalty & Respect - which is why he continues to stand and fight alongside guys like Thesz, Bruno, Muldoon & Mascaras… guys who believe in the same thing. The end is near when Cena gains the XPW World title for the first time in his fantasy wrestling career - but first he must take down a pack of hungry wolves at the gate - Samoa Joe & Tazz (and their new found shooters alliance) - the guys who SCREWED Cena out of a World title match @ “The 18th Letter”! Time to pay! Finally we get the ominous theme song for Samoa Joe - and the two towel-wearing killers stalk their way to ringside… they surround Cena in the ring, and slowly enter - boxing him in… they look to surround Cena and smash him down - when the pyro & confetti burst from the entrance ramp stops them - enter Cena’s partner for the night MIL MASCARAS!
SAMOA JOE & TAZ vs.
w/ versus
When we return from commercial Douglas is working on Sheamus with neck vices and chin locks as the commentators cover their rivalry (see “(Another) New Years Revolution”)… Lizzy Borden is selling her arm at ringside as Rousey’s cross over union with Burke is promoted… Sheamus fires back - hits his succession of moves - but before he can hit the Brogue Kick.. He’s bum rushed from behind! Two men hit the ring to blindside Sheamus and stomp him down, in full flagrant view of the ref! Ring the bell! Sheamus wins by DQ but Douglas keeps the belt!
Winner (by DQ): SHEAMUS
The two attackers are none other than “ROCKSTAR” JOEY KAOS (with “I beat Austin Aries” written across the back of his custom T-shirt) and his Primetime Playaz tag team partner TITUS O’NEIL!! The PtP both wear a version of Shane’s “Revolution” T-shirt! This must be new union Shane alluded to! His mentorship of the next era of fantasy wrestlers! PtP & Shane Douglas destroy Sheamus and pose (w/ Borden) flaunting their Revolution colors to end the segment…
PtP join the Revolution! MILLIONS OF DOLLARS! MILLIONS OF DOLLARS!
** CUT **
________________________________________________________________
”The Scene”
Starts with XPW Commissioner William Muldoon recapping his fallout with pupil Tommaso Ciampa in somber tones… he can’t move forward as a professional until this matter is resolved - and calls out Ciampa to iron out their differences right now…
TOMMASO CIAMPA appears (to moderate boos) - stone cold expressionless, with a stark blond goatee - shades of Viper Randy Orton meets Hollywood Hogan… as expected, Ciampa is sick of playing second-fiddle to Muldoon and being known simply as an Olympia underling… he demands Muldoon play favorites with his Commissioner position and assign Tommaso a title match… this is the first time Ciampa has broken his silence since this angle started… before Commissioner Muldoon can rebut him - we are interrupted by a familiar theme song..
Enter Phil “Gunner” Shatter (2013) and Jessica Darlin (2001)!!
Gunner is bigger and thicker than everybody in the ring and shakes them all down accordingly.. Big bully swagger from Gunner who has ditzy Jessica Darlin hanging on every word and action… Commissioner Muldoon finally speaks up for himself and raises Gunner’s ire - but of course the big, bad, muscle-bound Gunner won’t confront the aging, yet still tough as nails XPW commissioner to his face… he waits till Muldoon turns to confer with Ciampa (ostensibly to make a one-on-one match between him and Gunner next) - before blindsiding Muldoon from the rear with a huge double-ax handle sledge! Gunner attacks Muldoon from behind and lays waste to him in the middle of the ring! Meanwhile Ciampa just STANDS there watching! Gunner hit’s a devastating F5 onto William Muldoon! These attacks on authority figures are raging out of control since Rob Black came in, Solie rants on commentary! ANOTHER F5 from Gunner to Muldoon! Now he is about to set up a THIRD F5 - onto a steel chair produced by Darlin - when young Olympia rep and former XPW Remixed woman’s champion ALEXXIS NEVAEH makes the desperate run-in!
She covers her coaches body with her own, begging Gunner to show remorse… but Gunner’s angry face turns to one of sick, happy perversion at the sudden thought of getting his hands on her… Darlin cheers him on to crush her as well! Alexxis is pleading with her former stablemate Tommaso Ciampa to *DO* something to save their coach - but he does NOTHING! Instead, Ciampa turns his head and walks away! He’s leaving up the entrance ramp! There’s nothing stopping Gunner now, and he GRABS Alexxis by her throat and hoists her up into F5 position! He’s gonna KILL the girl! Suddenly - like a Patriot missile shot from a cannon - a savior bolts to the ring:
JOHN CENA!!
He BURSTS past Tommaso Ciampa on the entrance ramp (nearly knocking him down to get past him) - hits the ring - brawls with Gunner - reverses into an FUAA, driving Gunner from the ring for good - and rescues Alexxis Nevaeh! John Cena is the knight riding in on the white steed to save the girl and protect Olympia honor! Hustle, loyalty, respect and GUNNER & CIAMPA HAVE NONE!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
_____________________________________________________________________
We're back from commercial for an in-ring promo from John Cena (a continuation of the past segment and segue to the next)… Cena is sick of the politics, pandering and violent anarchy that is besieging XPW Remixed (and therefore fantasy wrestling as a whole, because XPW Remixed is the best)… he made a vow when he came here to stand for Hustle, Loyalty & Respect - which is why he continues to stand and fight alongside guys like Thesz, Bruno, Muldoon & Mascaras… guys who believe in the same thing. The end is near when Cena gains the XPW World title for the first time in his fantasy wrestling career - but first he must take down a pack of hungry wolves at the gate - Samoa Joe & Tazz (and their new found shooters alliance) - the guys who SCREWED Cena out of a World title match @ “The 18th Letter”! Time to pay! Finally we get the ominous theme song for Samoa Joe - and the two towel-wearing killers stalk their way to ringside… they surround Cena in the ring, and slowly enter - boxing him in… they look to surround Cena and smash him down - when the pyro & confetti burst from the entrance ramp stops them - enter Cena’s partner for the night MIL MASCARAS!
SAMOA JOE & TAZ vs.
MIL MASCARAS & JOHN CENA
versus
Much history between Mascaras & Cena (going all the way back to BCCW’s 1st PPV (“respect the shooters & hookers”) as we fly right into action… Texas-Tornado style match with all 4 men brawling wildly… spills ringside and into the fans as well… Cena & Joe going at it while Tazz & Mascaras grapple uncooperatively (a continuation of their own feud at “Damage Inc 2”)… end comes after a sequence up on the entrance ramp between Joe & Mascaras… out of nowhere a black-masked assailant SMASHES Mil Mascaras in the back/shoulder/arm with a steel pipe! Just as quickly, the assailant flees but the damage has been done - Mascaras holds his arm in pain… immediately Joe seizes the advantage, and snaps on a vicious arm breaker (bending Mil’s arm over the metal ramp edge for added leverage)… Mascaras has no choice but to *TAP OUT* as his arm bends at an obscene angle. Cena rescues his partner from any further damage, and stays beside him as paramedics check his arm... meanwhile Taz & Joe raise their arms aloft in victory, and for perhaps the first time in their XPW Remixed runs... sadistically smile! For finally, the collusion is revealed - Samoa Joe & Taz have performed a series of wrestling hits in return for a World title guarantee! Taz fights the champion next week on XPW TV (and doesn't give a DAMN whether it's Santel or Thesz) - and then will defend the title against SAMOA JOE @ "The 18th Letter"! Taz & Joe have it all planned out - and it will result in the greatest match in fantasy wrestling history at "The 18th Letter"! For the XPW World title! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Winners (by submission): SAMOA JOE & TAZ
** CUT **
______________________________________________________________
** XPW Remixed WORLD Championship **
LOU THESZ © versus AD SANTEL
("Submission Match")
versus
Recap of the long, storied history between the two - going back to Thesz’ days of training and his very first World title win in 1937 (something Ad Santel is now taking full credit for)… Shooters Club vs. Cali Cripplers feud carried XPW Remixed during it’s first season… now we get the main event entrances, MMA walk-outs and big fight feel… the two men refuse to shake hands to start and we’re off… Thesz (the bigger and taller of the two) takes early control with some grappling and take down attempts, but Santel counters every time… They have a fast-paced early exchange that gets the crowd on their feet chanting “THIS IS WRESTLING!”! Another series of counters - Thesz into a neck bridge submission - Santel escapes - and Thesz dominates him with some hurling dropkicks… headlock submission attempt from Thesz (in a nod to “Strangler” Lewis’ old finish)… Santel gets to the ropes to break, sneaks a thumb to the eye, and stretches Thesz into a modified camel clutch into a cattle mutilation-like move… even Striker has trouble identifying some of the exact names of the holds because they turn into hybrids out of necessity… we go back and forth, exchanging submissions, head scissors, and takedown attempts - Thesz clearly the greater physical specimen, but the wily Santel knows just enough dirty tactics to stay engaged… finally those tactics boil Lou to the breaking point and the brawl is on…
Stiff strikes, chops, European uppercuts and kicks… Thesz gets countered and driven into the steel ringpost, shoulder first (an already weakened appendage as a result of his wars with Del Rio)… Santel immediately targets the area with a variety of arm submissions… Thesz fought back and got Santel into the corner… but Santel pulled him into guard and went for a kimura attempt… Thesz winds up hitting Santel with a back suplex, followed by 3 snap suplexes in a row… neck breaker from Thesz and he’s trying for the STF - but Santel fights it off and slides out of the ring to regroup… back inside Santel strikes with a backbreaker but gets caught with a Lou Thesz press and flying forearm… the crowd is going crazy at the tireless display of wrestling chemistry displayed here, and Thesz begins to build momentum (but still can’t get the STF)… finally things get really heated - a ref gets bumped - and Santel reaches into his bag of tricks for the old “brass knuckles” bit (something that helped win him plenty of matches in XPW Remixed, including driving former pupil B-Boy from the company for good)… it’s a nod to the William Regal-school of heel treachery and also a testament to the depths Santel will stoop to for victory & financial gain… but he never gets the shot off - Thesz uses expert wrestling to disarm him - and ultimately tie him up into the STF submission! Santel tries everything to counter (including rolling through) but simply cannot! Thesz is too big! Ad Santel ultra-dramatically TAPS OUT! Ring the bell! Lou Thesz has forced Ad Santel to give up!
Winner (and STILL XPW Remixed WORLD Champion): LOU THESZ
Lou Thesz defends the XPW World title against TAZ next week on XPW TV!
The winner meets Samoa Joe @ "The 18th Letter"!
Stay tuned!!
** FADE OUT **
______________________________________________________________
XPW Remixed presents...
"The 18th Letter"
** XPW Remixed WORLD championship **
Samoa Joe vs Lou Thesz © / or TAZ (2000)
** XPW Remixed tag team titles **
Dudley Boyz (2009) © versus Fabulous Kangaroos (1960)
** FADE OUT **
____________________________________________________________
CREDITS:
LOU THESZ: WrestlingClassics.com messageboard
versus
Much history between Mascaras & Cena (going all the way back to BCCW’s 1st PPV (“respect the shooters & hookers”) as we fly right into action… Texas-Tornado style match with all 4 men brawling wildly… spills ringside and into the fans as well… Cena & Joe going at it while Tazz & Mascaras grapple uncooperatively (a continuation of their own feud at “Damage Inc 2”)… end comes after a sequence up on the entrance ramp between Joe & Mascaras… out of nowhere a black-masked assailant SMASHES Mil Mascaras in the back/shoulder/arm with a steel pipe! Just as quickly, the assailant flees but the damage has been done - Mascaras holds his arm in pain… immediately Joe seizes the advantage, and snaps on a vicious arm breaker (bending Mil’s arm over the metal ramp edge for added leverage)… Mascaras has no choice but to *TAP OUT* as his arm bends at an obscene angle. Cena rescues his partner from any further damage, and stays beside him as paramedics check his arm... meanwhile Taz & Joe raise their arms aloft in victory, and for perhaps the first time in their XPW Remixed runs... sadistically smile! For finally, the collusion is revealed - Samoa Joe & Taz have performed a series of wrestling hits in return for a World title guarantee! Taz fights the champion next week on XPW TV (and doesn't give a DAMN whether it's Santel or Thesz) - and then will defend the title against SAMOA JOE @ "The 18th Letter"! Taz & Joe have it all planned out - and it will result in the greatest match in fantasy wrestling history at "The 18th Letter"! For the XPW World title! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Winners (by submission): SAMOA JOE & TAZ
** CUT **
______________________________________________________________
** XPW Remixed WORLD Championship **
LOU THESZ © versus AD SANTEL
("Submission Match")
versus
Recap of the long, storied history between the two - going back to Thesz’ days of training and his very first World title win in 1937 (something Ad Santel is now taking full credit for)… Shooters Club vs. Cali Cripplers feud carried XPW Remixed during it’s first season… now we get the main event entrances, MMA walk-outs and big fight feel… the two men refuse to shake hands to start and we’re off… Thesz (the bigger and taller of the two) takes early control with some grappling and take down attempts, but Santel counters every time… They have a fast-paced early exchange that gets the crowd on their feet chanting “THIS IS WRESTLING!”! Another series of counters - Thesz into a neck bridge submission - Santel escapes - and Thesz dominates him with some hurling dropkicks… headlock submission attempt from Thesz (in a nod to “Strangler” Lewis’ old finish)… Santel gets to the ropes to break, sneaks a thumb to the eye, and stretches Thesz into a modified camel clutch into a cattle mutilation-like move… even Striker has trouble identifying some of the exact names of the holds because they turn into hybrids out of necessity… we go back and forth, exchanging submissions, head scissors, and takedown attempts - Thesz clearly the greater physical specimen, but the wily Santel knows just enough dirty tactics to stay engaged… finally those tactics boil Lou to the breaking point and the brawl is on…
Stiff strikes, chops, European uppercuts and kicks… Thesz gets countered and driven into the steel ringpost, shoulder first (an already weakened appendage as a result of his wars with Del Rio)… Santel immediately targets the area with a variety of arm submissions… Thesz fought back and got Santel into the corner… but Santel pulled him into guard and went for a kimura attempt… Thesz winds up hitting Santel with a back suplex, followed by 3 snap suplexes in a row… neck breaker from Thesz and he’s trying for the STF - but Santel fights it off and slides out of the ring to regroup… back inside Santel strikes with a backbreaker but gets caught with a Lou Thesz press and flying forearm… the crowd is going crazy at the tireless display of wrestling chemistry displayed here, and Thesz begins to build momentum (but still can’t get the STF)… finally things get really heated - a ref gets bumped - and Santel reaches into his bag of tricks for the old “brass knuckles” bit (something that helped win him plenty of matches in XPW Remixed, including driving former pupil B-Boy from the company for good)… it’s a nod to the William Regal-school of heel treachery and also a testament to the depths Santel will stoop to for victory & financial gain… but he never gets the shot off - Thesz uses expert wrestling to disarm him - and ultimately tie him up into the STF submission! Santel tries everything to counter (including rolling through) but simply cannot! Thesz is too big! Ad Santel ultra-dramatically TAPS OUT! Ring the bell! Lou Thesz has forced Ad Santel to give up!
Winner (and STILL XPW Remixed WORLD Champion): LOU THESZ
Lou Thesz defends the XPW World title against TAZ next week on XPW TV!
The winner meets Samoa Joe @ "The 18th Letter"!
Stay tuned!!
** FADE OUT **
______________________________________________________________
XPW Remixed presents...
"The 18th Letter"
** XPW Remixed WORLD championship **
Samoa Joe vs Lou Thesz © / or TAZ (2000)
** XPW Remixed tag team titles **
Dudley Boyz (2009) © versus Fabulous Kangaroos (1960)
** FADE OUT **
____________________________________________________________
CREDITS:
LOU THESZ: WrestlingClassics.com messageboard