Post by MadStepDad on Aug 3, 2012 13:16:27 GMT -5
Cut to the in-studio announce team for the evening:
Gordon Solie & Matt Striker
This is the new style - XPW Remixed on blue meth… in the wake of Rob Black’s scandalous antics (see XPW TV Episode #50 & “Damage Inc II”) we’ve lost our PPV slot, changed air time (airing almost 5AM now on the East Coast) and chopped 65 minutes from our weekly serial due to lost sponsorships (dropping XPW TV to approximately 2:15 with overrun)… But the biggest source of rebellion may come from the XPW Remixed talent themselves - now united a single independent champion… LOU THESZ regained his XPW World title @ “Damage Inc 2” and now says HE’S calling the shots… let’s hear from the new XPW World champion right now…
** CUT TO RING **
___________________________________________________________
”Heroes of Light / Champions of Darkness”
Lou Thesz in ring promo to start… unlike others of his ilk (subliminal shot @ Bruno), Thesz is forced to stay and fight this battle - not pack up and flee… he’s starting a movement to oust Rob Black from his perch and ban him from fantasy wrestling for good! From now on Lou Thesz - the XPW WORLD champion - calls the shots, starting tonight when he names his own #1 contender… but before he can, he’s interrupted by ALBERTO DEL RIO!
The former champion is irate and demands his rematch… then they are cut off by SAMOA JOE!
The Samoan Submission machine has a bone to pick as well, and let’s both of them know it with no uncertain terms… but Lou Thesz is a leader and puts them both in their place… Alberto Del Rio will get his rematch… TONIGHT (big pop!) But Lou Thesz is working personally with the state athletic commission to add some caveats to this match to guarantee a fair encounter… meanwhile - Samoa Joe is enraged at being overlooked and angrily confronts Thesz - but the champion is two moves ahead… you see Lou Thesz has already conferred with Commissioner Muldoon about securing Samoa Joe another #1 Contenders match (pop)… NEXT (big pop)… against this man…
JOHN CENA 2012 (biggest pop of the night)!!
Go-home promo from John Cena putting each man in their place, hyping up the Cenation - and telling Thesz “good luck tonight I’ll see you @ “The 18th Letter”!! Cena and Thesz go nose to nose while Joe and Del Rio do the same! Cena/Joe rematch tonight - and finally - the Del Rio/Thesz rubber match for the XPW World championship! Stay tuned!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
_____________________________________________________________
JOHN CENA versus SAMOA JOE
("Winner gets World Title shot @ PPV“)
versus
The winner of this match receives a title bout at the upcoming iPPV "The 18th Letter"... against WHOEVER the champion is at that time... Samoa Joe wants to start with a handshake but Cena refuses (he won’t shake the hand of a man who sneak attacked him with a chair) and Joe becomes irate over the slight… The storyline from HitC (see “DI2”) continues tonight with an emphasis being placed on Cena’s weakened ribs and arm - the result of Del Rio’s pipe attack… it nullifies some of Cena’s big power moves, and Joe’s shoot-style kicks and strikes are just relentless… surprisingly (to some) - Joe actually reverses an FUAA attempt into a Kokina clutch and almost gets the win - but Cena’s arm refuses to drop a 3rd time… these guys fight all the way through commercial break and back again, as Striker & Solie rave about how great this sponteneous match has turned out to be... then they (and the live announcer) begin keeping track of the 15 minute TV time limit, nad you realize this is probably going to a draw... Finally, per usual, Cena makes the superman comeback - Spikes Joe with a uranage - hits the 5 knuckle shuffle with great fanfare... but when he goes to the top rope to execute his flying legdrop... he's attacked from behind by TAZ (?!?) Cena doesn't even see it coming - gets crotched on the top rope - and Joe HITS the muscle buster! He locks in the rear naked choke again and this time CENA GOES TO SLEEP! With minutes left to spare, Cena's body goes cold and limp in Joe's grip! HE DID IT! The Samoan Submission machine choked out John Cena! With an unacknowledged assist from TAZ?!?
Winner: SAMOA JOE
(Post match, Taz cannot be reached for comment - he simply shrugs off MSD with an angry glare - and continues his march down the darkened backstage corridors..
** CUT **
_____________________________________________________________
MARK HENRY versus GREAT GAMA
(Special “Strongman‘s Challenge“ match)
versus
Mark Henry challenges Gama to a round of Persian club twirling (a deceptively difficult display of classic strongman power) and LOSES to the Punjabi Lion before jealously attacking him from behind with the club… from there a bell rings signifying a match and the bigger Mark Henry has his way with Gama in an impressive display… but Gama gets the heroic baby face comeback, even managing to snare Mark Henry in his swinging neck breaker… but Henry reaches the ropes to break - hit’s a lariat, knocking Gama over the top rope - before charging Gama and driving them both THROUGH the ringside barricade wall (ala Sheamus vs. Mark Henry Summerslam 2011)… “HOLY SH**!” and “XPW XPW!” chants as Mark Henry gets the count-out victory… post match he attacks Gama one last time and crushes him with a World’s Strongest Slam right onto the metal ring steps set up in the middle of the ring, leaving Gama twitching and shaking on the mat…
Winner (by count out): MARK HENRY
** MATCH SEGUE **
BAM BAM BIGELOW versus DAMIEN SANDOW
versus w/
Mark Henry looks like he’s gonna go for another shot on Great Gama - when none other than BAM BAM BIGELOW charges from the locker room for the save! Mark Henry is wise and immediately rolls from the ring to avoid collision, and powders out… that leaves Bam Bam Bigelow to stomp and fume angrily in the ring… he grabs a mic and unleashes a loud, ignorant, coke-fueled roar - calling out his former manager “Wild” Red Berry and his “singles superstar of the future” Damien Sandow! Eventually - the high class, sophisticated duo answer the call and smugly antagonize Bigelow for his slovenly features and idiotic antics - getting him all hopped up - but refuse to fight him! He’s “beneath them” and that enrages Bigelow MORE! He actually gets his hands on Berry by the lapels of his suit for a moment (BIG crowd pop) - but it’s just a set up for Damien Sandow to attack him from behind… muay-thai knees and crisp striking from Sandow… Bam Bam manages to fight back and once again goes for Berry at ringside - but this time none other than former partner BULL RAMOS appears from the crowd to clobber Bam Bam with a hard lariat on the floor… bad guys take over and the result is elementary - Sandow hit’s the neck breaker and rolls into position -cocky pin and all… Bigelow has been disposed of by Berry and his crew like yesterday’s trash…
Winner: DAMIEN SANDOW
Post match Bigelow attempts to gain a measure of revenge by brawling with Bull Ramos all the way up the aisle and backstage… but unfortunately for the Bammer, he stumbles right into a hornets nest - out of the inky blackness of the backstage area, Bigelow is set upon by SNUFF and POGO the CLOWN! The two Xtreme nightmares (and XPW Originals) engulf Bigelow - beat him down - and bury his body in a burning dumpster… the horror of XPW Remixed continues to grow only stronger - consuming yet another fantasy wrestling soul…
The Bowels of Fantasy Wrestling reside within in XPW Remixed...
___________________________________________________________
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
XPW Remixed VP Joseph “Toots” Mondt (along with his bone breakers Dick Shikat & Dino Bravo) surround Commissioner William Muldoon backstage… but it’s only to offer a few saccharine-sweet words of praise for Muldoon’s work so far… but Muldoon remains wary as Mondt segues to his “unity within the company” speech - and how GDT Inc feels excluded from the championship presentation tonight - so in an effort of fairness towards them Mr Mondt is including a hand-picked GDT Inc official to make sure everything remains on the up and up… that referee will be DANNY DAVIS… but Muldoon only smirks and says there is either more chance for incompetency tonight - or less - because Muldoon (with the champion Lou Thesz’ urging) has made the main event a BEST 2 OUT OF 3 FALLS MATCH! Just like they used to in the old days! Mr Mondt’s fake grin drops! Muldoon slips out of the picture while Mondt’s face darkens and he barks orders at his underlings Shikit & Bravo…
** CUT TO RING **
TAZ (2000) versus MIZ (2011)
versus
Angry Tazz 2000 intro complete with “FTW” title belt, microphone and mean chip on his shoulder… he too targets the XPW hierarchy in a shoot promo - calling out Mondt’s gambling vices and Rob Black’s previous incarceration… but Tazz main gripe involves Mil Mascaras & Commissioner Muldoon (see “Damage Inc 2”) - Taz accuses Muldoon of conspiring to keep the FTW champion away from the title scene in XPW Remixed... that's why Taz went out and struck an agreement on his own (apparently with Samoa Joe - see opening match tonight) with the future XPW World champion to assure himself a title shot! Taz don't need the Commissioner's help, FTW! Taz tries to call Muldoon out but gets MIZ instead! The XPW Remixed fan favorite sarcastically applauds and addresses Taz, using celebrity roast-like quips to answer the challenge himself! But Miz doesn’t even have a chance to remove his ring jacket - as the .5 seconds he averts his eyes from Taz gets him ATTACKED by the Human Suplex Machine! “Sportz” beats “Entertainment” again here tonight as Taz makes quick, crushing work of Miz, before locking in the Tazmission in the center of the ring… Miz taps out but has the excuse of being jumped before the bell… Tazz is the winner by submission - but won’t break the hold, even with referees and officials trying to pry him off - until none other than Commissioner William Muldoon arrives! So Muldoon REVERSES the decision and gives Miz the win by DQ! (fan pop and Tazz explosion)..
Winner (by DQ): THE MIZ
Commissioner Muldoon answers Tazz call for action with another decree - Tazz will get his action - TONIGHT - when he competes AGAIN - in a 6 man tag team match later - against MIL MASCARAS! The crowd clearly wants to see it, but Taz just stares at Muldoon from ringside, panting and fuming… what is he thinking???
** CUT **
______________________________________________________
HAKUSHI KURO (1995) versus…
JOHN MORRISON (2008)!!
w/ versus
Live documentary-style video footage of cameras following Muldoon backstage through the entrance curtain - where in the inky darkness - ATSUSHI ONITA emerges from the shadows! In a dark and frightening exchange he attempts to intimidate Muldoon before revealing his assassin HAKUSHI KURO lurking nearby! Is it going to be an attempted homicide on Commissioner Muldoon!?? NO! He turns it around like Walter White asking “what’s my name?” (Breaking Bad reference) and averts conflict… see, Muldoon has already taken Onita’s threats very seriously (they too have threatened Muldoon’s reign with various show hijackings and disruptive wrestler hits)… and Muldoon has combed the fantasy wrestling spectrum for somebody willing to answer the call to arms against Hakushi Kuro in the ring… somebody with the speed, stamina, skill and exotic martial arts style to combat him… and they will find out WHO that opponent is NOW because that match is NEXT! Cut to commercial… when we return Onita & Hakushi Kuro are already in the ring… and we get the surprise XPW Remixed debut of JOHN MORRISON! This match was actually filmed at the “DI2” PPV but cut due to time constraints… in a sick appetizer match (with the kayfabe benefit of Onita & Hakushi being “unprepared” for the challenge - hence the match length), Morrison & Hakushi utilize an attack style that is half MMA / half Hollywood action movie… they match each other move-for-dazzling-mind-boggling-move, with Morrison subtly gaining the advantage on each successive exchange… until it climaxes with a springboard somersault kick to Onita (knocking him off the apron) and a Starship Pain (see “50 Greatest Finishers in WWE History” extras) from John Morrison for the win! JOHN MORRISON DEBUTS WITH A HUGE WIN IN XPW REMIXED!
Winner: JOHN MORRISON
(Morrison powders out post match for the break-up of Onita/Hakushi… Onita shouts him down on the mic for failure and disgrace and all this hardcore Japanese honor shit… but when he dare SLAP Hakushi in the face (2 times, not just once) - Hakushi finally SNAPS! When Onita demand he submit to a Kendo stick lashing, Hakushi Kuro instead answers with a spit of BLACK MIST to the face of Onita! The Japanese madman is blinded! Hakushi Kuro kicks the shit out of Onita before breaking his own Kendo stick over his head, officially turning face again…)
Hakushi Kuro rebels against the twisted brainwashing of Atsushi Onita!
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
XPW Remixed WORLD champion Lou Thesz (w/ Shooters Club back-up) makes an appearence in President Ed "Strangler" Lewis' office.. the now-tenous relationship between Thesz & Lewis necessitates another play from Lou's handbook on how NOT to screwed by wrestling promoters... if Danny Davis is the assigned in-ring official for the match... then Thesz has sequestered the rights to a 2nd outside official... a troubleshooting special enforcer who will control the ring perimeter... who is this special enforcer? Ed Lewis demands to know but Thesz tells him he can find out when the rest of the world does... TONIGHT during the main event! But as a final order in his ultimate lordship - Ed "Strangler" Lewis has barred any and all members of Lou Thesz' shooters club from the building!
Who is Lou Thesz' special ringside enforcer?? Find out TONIGHT Stay tuned!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
_______________________________________________________________
”Rue the Day of the Rise”
The perpetual state of chaos, confusion and upheaval continues to grip the Black Army… but now, Rob Black seems oddly serene… like the guy with the messiest office but knows where everything is… a smug confidence exudes from Rob Black as everybody around him screams their grievances… instead he turns it around into a reason for celebration… the CZWO is dead and Black will continue to snipe out the lone straggling members one-by-one, provided they don’t feast upon themselves first… so Rob Black has prepared a celebration for tonight - a “fantasy wrestling spit roast” so to speak… so break out the champagne glasses (over heads) and Dean Ambrose is ordered towards the ring to receive his “gift”…
** King of the Death Match championship **
KILO © & DEAN AMBROSE versus CURLY MOE
& versus
Curly Moe is clearly the lamb being led to the slaughter, and both Solie & Striker on commentary are disgusted with it… it looks like Rob Black may have been going for an adult comedy, “Old School” movie, Porkys kind of gross out humor here but it just dissolves into the downright rude and disturbing… like making fun of fat people and retards in one fell swoop… they even humiliatingly strip Curly Moe to his undergarments and slather him with cooking oil in a disgusting spot… turns vicious at the end when Kilo unleashes a series of concussive-head butts that literally bust Moe’s head open the hardway (cuz Kilo is on coke and impervious to pain, see?)… Steel chair con-chair-to from Ambrose & Kilo kills Curly Moe and writes his brand of humor out of XPW Remixed for good…BLAM!
Winner (s): KILO © & DEAN AMBROSE
Post match, the Black Army friction continues with “Prince of Darkness” Kevin Sullivan (1982) confronting Dean Ambrose in the middle of the ring over subordination… this time, Rob Black (w/ Jack Pfefer of course) enter the ring NOT to diffuse it, but fan the flames more… Ambrose & Sullivan are like Savage & Hogan battling over who belongs in the N.W.O. in WCW - and it appears everybody is congregating behind Kevin Sullivan in the dispute… but Rob Black (w/ Jack Pfefers evil counsel of course) creates the evil swerve at the end and just like that - everybody sides with Dean Ambrose… tremendous beat down results and even Snuff lays into his once-master Kevin Sullivan… blade job, chair shots, finishing moves, the whole 9... Kevin Sullivan goes out like Bigelow, Sid and other casualties of the Black Army before him… D.O.A…
** CUT **
________________________________________________________________
** Tag Team Fatal 4-Way Match **
FABULOUS KANGAROOS (w/ Wild Red Berry)
versus
GENERATION ME
versus
THE MOVEMENT (starring Rashad Cameron)
versus...
BRIAN KENDRICK & PAUL LONDON (Debut!!)
w/
versus vs w/
versus...
XPW Tag team champions (see “DI2”) Dudley Boyz take up commentary positions beside Solie & Striker and review their victory… Wild Red Berry antagonizes them from ringside multiple times during the match… GenME were cocky and condescending in their original masquerade, but now that the REAL objects of their derision (Kendrick & London) have arrived with their veteran credentials and smart mouths - GenME have been reduced to bitter, crybaby wannabes… in a continuation of their 2010 Dream Match of the Year (see Big Time Wrestling (BTW)’s “Wrestlefest 2010”) Gen ME & London & Kendrick tear it up, WCW cruiserweight style while the FabKangs add muscle and classic tag team chemistry… Cryme Tyme 2.0 retain their heat with outrageous and annoying displays of braggadocio and gang-related antics, but JTG winds up getting bumped around by London & Kendrick and the FabKangs when they’re on offense… GenME have seen enough and desert the free-for-all at ringside between Kendrick/London & the Movement (including an incredible set of stereo dives from Brian and Paul onto everybody)… GenME throw their hands up and exit backstage, getting counted out… Kendrick/London hit a sliced bread/shooting star press combo to JTG for the certain pinfall… but London eats an old fashioned Australian flag pole to the spine from the FabKangs to break it up (the ref was distracted in the madness)… then while taunting the Dudley Bros heavily, the FabKangs swoop up Paul London into an improvised DWI-like manuever (Heffernan suplex into an Al Costello power bomb) that finishes London…
Winners: FABULOUS KANGAROOS
Post match Wild Red Berry gets a few (encyclopedic) words to incite the crowd and Dudley Brothers further - put over his FabKangs as REAL tag team champions, screwed by American incompetence - and drive everybody crazy… but after egging the Dudley Boyz onto the breaking point, the FabKangs and Berry quickly flee the ring and avoid contact! That leaves the Movement led by Rashad Cameron to play post-match foils - attempt to attack the Dudz - get cleaned out one by one - and finish with Rashad Cameron himself (the former “Sabian) getting driven through a table by the Dudley Death Drop!! Dudz pose in the ring with their belts to big cheers, while the FabKangs and Berry point to their brains and slink backstage…
Dudley Boyz continue to add to their championship resume with a set of XPW Remixed tag team titles...
** CUT **
__________________________________________________________
** DARK MATCHES **
A new segment that puts over cut matches in fast, MTV-styled, video hype clips - usually set to some kind of heavy metal or Hip Hop background music.. this is the kind of stuff that would have appeared on the now-dormant XPW Online, or within the 3rd hour of XPW TV that has been lost...
** RUCKUS def. MICHAEL TARVER **
** RICKY REYES def. former partner ROCKY ROMERO **
** Slaughtahouse Stampede (the rematch) **
1) New Jack (attacked by Sandman & Necro Butcher)
2) Danny Havoc (eliminated by Sabu)
3) MadMan Pondo (*accidentally* eliminated by stablemate Messiah)
4) Drake Younger (Sabu)
5) Jun Kasai (Messiah)
6) Bull Ramos (Messiah & Sabu)
7) Sabu (LOD)
8) The MESSIAH (LOD - with nobody left to help, Messiah goes out defiantly and without honor)
9) LOD ANIMAL **winner**
10) LOD HAWK **winner**
** Sable def. Annie Social & Sunny in a 3-way Mudbowl match... Sable challenges XPW Remixed champion Trish Stratus to a title match... **
**Xtreme Rulez Death Match **
Thumbtack Jack def. Sami Callihan (DVD onto pile of syringes)
** CUT **
_________________________________________________________________
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Tazz is spotted backstage with his gear, pulling his luggage cart towards the parking lot… despite Muldoon’s earlier decree about competing again tonight - Tazz does as he pleases! He’s done competing tonight! F[edited] The World!
** CUT TO VIDEO **
** Damage Inc 2 results **
** CUT TO RING **
ROB VAN DAM versus DAVID OTUNGA
versus
David Otunga’s vain, narcissistic entrance is preceded by RVD’s rousing pro-marijuana Television entrance… commentators cover the FOCUS/RVD “Hollywood script vs. Abstract freeform” feud that climaxed with Gorgeous George Wagner (1950) being shaved bald in the center of the ring (see “DI2”)… this is the 2nd time Otunga and RVD have clashed on the XPW Remixed stage, but Otunga doesn’t have the benefit of claiming “unprepared” tonight… Commissioner Muldoon gave him a week to get ready and he still loses in relatively short order… the “pro rasslin” drama is played out at the end when Otunga finally gets the brief advantage - and tries calling out to the back for assistance… but a hood-wearing Gorgeous George won’t budge from his dressing room! He REFUSES to show his bald head in public! Otunga is deserted and foiled! 5-Star Frog splash from RVD seals the deal like a lick of honey…
Winner: ROB VAN DAM
** MATCH SEGUE **
JINDER MAHAL interrupts RVD’s victory celebration… much like the closing days of his feud with Great Gama, Jinder Mahal accuses RVD of the most horrible of all sportz-related sins… PED’s! RVD is on Performance Enhancing Drugs! THC! These outrageous accusations and threats of criminal lawsuits immediately draw out XPW Remixed commission WILLIAM MULDOON!
As an official he is forced to recognize Jinder Mahal’s grievances, but until formal testing can be completed, Jinder Mahal’s charges are just heresy and allegations… but they certainly outrage the reigning XPW TV champion RVD (and his platoon of pot-puffing fans behind him)… after it seems Muldoon has once again laid down the law - we get a 2nd interruption… MATT MORGAN & “Nature Boy” BUDDY ROGERS!
They too have a HUGE bone to pick with Muldoon over his last minute change to their match at “DI2” that wound up costing them a cool million bucks! They go about trying to strong-arm THEIR way into the already-crowded XPW TV title scene as well - until a popular theme song finally cuts them off… enter SHEAMUS (2012)!!
The affable Irish homeboy is all cheers and grins after his victory at “DI2” - which incidentally has only yielded $250k and NOT the full milly as specified… yet - but Sheamus does indeed plan on getting paid and full, which is why he has a lean placed on Morgan/Rogers that says a portion of every victory purse must go to Sheamus until his million dollar debt is paid! Who’s the slave and master now?? Everybody is itching for action, and since everything is going to Hell already, Muldoon makes the 6-man tag match now! RVD, Sheamus & MIL MASCARAS (pop) versus Jinder Mahal & Matt Morgan… and what was SUPPOSED to be Taz, but since he decided to no-show it will be a handi… and we’re cut off by the final interruption of the segment - reigning XPW Boston champion SHANE DOUGLAS and his valet LIZZY BORDEN!
Douglas cuts another shoot promo on being "ignored" and "disrespected" by the XPW Remixed brass, despite holding the highly coveted XPW Boston championship... and since Douglas isn't booked tonight for some strange reason - he's taking it upon himself to fill Taz spot after his walk out! Shane Douglas is booking himself into the 6-man tag team match! Coming up next!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
SHEAMUS, RVD © & MIL MASCARAS
versus
MATT MORGAN (w/ Buddy Rogers), JINDER MAHAL
& SHANE DOUGLAS © (w/ Lizzy Borden)
w/ versus
Live documentary-style video footage of cameras following Muldoon backstage through the entrance curtain - where in the inky darkness - ATSUSHI ONITA emerges from the shadows! In a dark and frightening exchange he attempts to intimidate Muldoon before revealing his assassin HAKUSHI KURO lurking nearby! Is it going to be an attempted homicide on Commissioner Muldoon!?? NO! He turns it around like Walter White asking “what’s my name?” (Breaking Bad reference) and averts conflict… see, Muldoon has already taken Onita’s threats very seriously (they too have threatened Muldoon’s reign with various show hijackings and disruptive wrestler hits)… and Muldoon has combed the fantasy wrestling spectrum for somebody willing to answer the call to arms against Hakushi Kuro in the ring… somebody with the speed, stamina, skill and exotic martial arts style to combat him… and they will find out WHO that opponent is NOW because that match is NEXT! Cut to commercial… when we return Onita & Hakushi Kuro are already in the ring… and we get the surprise XPW Remixed debut of JOHN MORRISON! This match was actually filmed at the “DI2” PPV but cut due to time constraints… in a sick appetizer match (with the kayfabe benefit of Onita & Hakushi being “unprepared” for the challenge - hence the match length), Morrison & Hakushi utilize an attack style that is half MMA / half Hollywood action movie… they match each other move-for-dazzling-mind-boggling-move, with Morrison subtly gaining the advantage on each successive exchange… until it climaxes with a springboard somersault kick to Onita (knocking him off the apron) and a Starship Pain (see “50 Greatest Finishers in WWE History” extras) from John Morrison for the win! JOHN MORRISON DEBUTS WITH A HUGE WIN IN XPW REMIXED!
Winner: JOHN MORRISON
(Morrison powders out post match for the break-up of Onita/Hakushi… Onita shouts him down on the mic for failure and disgrace and all this hardcore Japanese honor shit… but when he dare SLAP Hakushi in the face (2 times, not just once) - Hakushi finally SNAPS! When Onita demand he submit to a Kendo stick lashing, Hakushi Kuro instead answers with a spit of BLACK MIST to the face of Onita! The Japanese madman is blinded! Hakushi Kuro kicks the shit out of Onita before breaking his own Kendo stick over his head, officially turning face again…)
Hakushi Kuro rebels against the twisted brainwashing of Atsushi Onita!
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
XPW Remixed WORLD champion Lou Thesz (w/ Shooters Club back-up) makes an appearence in President Ed "Strangler" Lewis' office.. the now-tenous relationship between Thesz & Lewis necessitates another play from Lou's handbook on how NOT to screwed by wrestling promoters... if Danny Davis is the assigned in-ring official for the match... then Thesz has sequestered the rights to a 2nd outside official... a troubleshooting special enforcer who will control the ring perimeter... who is this special enforcer? Ed Lewis demands to know but Thesz tells him he can find out when the rest of the world does... TONIGHT during the main event! But as a final order in his ultimate lordship - Ed "Strangler" Lewis has barred any and all members of Lou Thesz' shooters club from the building!
Who is Lou Thesz' special ringside enforcer?? Find out TONIGHT Stay tuned!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
_______________________________________________________________
”Rue the Day of the Rise”
The perpetual state of chaos, confusion and upheaval continues to grip the Black Army… but now, Rob Black seems oddly serene… like the guy with the messiest office but knows where everything is… a smug confidence exudes from Rob Black as everybody around him screams their grievances… instead he turns it around into a reason for celebration… the CZWO is dead and Black will continue to snipe out the lone straggling members one-by-one, provided they don’t feast upon themselves first… so Rob Black has prepared a celebration for tonight - a “fantasy wrestling spit roast” so to speak… so break out the champagne glasses (over heads) and Dean Ambrose is ordered towards the ring to receive his “gift”…
** King of the Death Match championship **
KILO © & DEAN AMBROSE versus CURLY MOE
& versus
Curly Moe is clearly the lamb being led to the slaughter, and both Solie & Striker on commentary are disgusted with it… it looks like Rob Black may have been going for an adult comedy, “Old School” movie, Porkys kind of gross out humor here but it just dissolves into the downright rude and disturbing… like making fun of fat people and retards in one fell swoop… they even humiliatingly strip Curly Moe to his undergarments and slather him with cooking oil in a disgusting spot… turns vicious at the end when Kilo unleashes a series of concussive-head butts that literally bust Moe’s head open the hardway (cuz Kilo is on coke and impervious to pain, see?)… Steel chair con-chair-to from Ambrose & Kilo kills Curly Moe and writes his brand of humor out of XPW Remixed for good…BLAM!
Winner (s): KILO © & DEAN AMBROSE
Post match, the Black Army friction continues with “Prince of Darkness” Kevin Sullivan (1982) confronting Dean Ambrose in the middle of the ring over subordination… this time, Rob Black (w/ Jack Pfefer of course) enter the ring NOT to diffuse it, but fan the flames more… Ambrose & Sullivan are like Savage & Hogan battling over who belongs in the N.W.O. in WCW - and it appears everybody is congregating behind Kevin Sullivan in the dispute… but Rob Black (w/ Jack Pfefers evil counsel of course) creates the evil swerve at the end and just like that - everybody sides with Dean Ambrose… tremendous beat down results and even Snuff lays into his once-master Kevin Sullivan… blade job, chair shots, finishing moves, the whole 9... Kevin Sullivan goes out like Bigelow, Sid and other casualties of the Black Army before him… D.O.A…
** CUT **
________________________________________________________________
** Tag Team Fatal 4-Way Match **
FABULOUS KANGAROOS (w/ Wild Red Berry)
versus
GENERATION ME
versus
THE MOVEMENT (starring Rashad Cameron)
versus...
BRIAN KENDRICK & PAUL LONDON (Debut!!)
w/
versus vs w/
versus...
XPW Tag team champions (see “DI2”) Dudley Boyz take up commentary positions beside Solie & Striker and review their victory… Wild Red Berry antagonizes them from ringside multiple times during the match… GenME were cocky and condescending in their original masquerade, but now that the REAL objects of their derision (Kendrick & London) have arrived with their veteran credentials and smart mouths - GenME have been reduced to bitter, crybaby wannabes… in a continuation of their 2010 Dream Match of the Year (see Big Time Wrestling (BTW)’s “Wrestlefest 2010”) Gen ME & London & Kendrick tear it up, WCW cruiserweight style while the FabKangs add muscle and classic tag team chemistry… Cryme Tyme 2.0 retain their heat with outrageous and annoying displays of braggadocio and gang-related antics, but JTG winds up getting bumped around by London & Kendrick and the FabKangs when they’re on offense… GenME have seen enough and desert the free-for-all at ringside between Kendrick/London & the Movement (including an incredible set of stereo dives from Brian and Paul onto everybody)… GenME throw their hands up and exit backstage, getting counted out… Kendrick/London hit a sliced bread/shooting star press combo to JTG for the certain pinfall… but London eats an old fashioned Australian flag pole to the spine from the FabKangs to break it up (the ref was distracted in the madness)… then while taunting the Dudley Bros heavily, the FabKangs swoop up Paul London into an improvised DWI-like manuever (Heffernan suplex into an Al Costello power bomb) that finishes London…
Winners: FABULOUS KANGAROOS
Post match Wild Red Berry gets a few (encyclopedic) words to incite the crowd and Dudley Brothers further - put over his FabKangs as REAL tag team champions, screwed by American incompetence - and drive everybody crazy… but after egging the Dudley Boyz onto the breaking point, the FabKangs and Berry quickly flee the ring and avoid contact! That leaves the Movement led by Rashad Cameron to play post-match foils - attempt to attack the Dudz - get cleaned out one by one - and finish with Rashad Cameron himself (the former “Sabian) getting driven through a table by the Dudley Death Drop!! Dudz pose in the ring with their belts to big cheers, while the FabKangs and Berry point to their brains and slink backstage…
Dudley Boyz continue to add to their championship resume with a set of XPW Remixed tag team titles...
** CUT **
__________________________________________________________
** DARK MATCHES **
A new segment that puts over cut matches in fast, MTV-styled, video hype clips - usually set to some kind of heavy metal or Hip Hop background music.. this is the kind of stuff that would have appeared on the now-dormant XPW Online, or within the 3rd hour of XPW TV that has been lost...
** RUCKUS def. MICHAEL TARVER **
** RICKY REYES def. former partner ROCKY ROMERO **
** Slaughtahouse Stampede (the rematch) **
1) New Jack (attacked by Sandman & Necro Butcher)
2) Danny Havoc (eliminated by Sabu)
3) MadMan Pondo (*accidentally* eliminated by stablemate Messiah)
4) Drake Younger (Sabu)
5) Jun Kasai (Messiah)
6) Bull Ramos (Messiah & Sabu)
7) Sabu (LOD)
8) The MESSIAH (LOD - with nobody left to help, Messiah goes out defiantly and without honor)
9) LOD ANIMAL **winner**
10) LOD HAWK **winner**
** Sable def. Annie Social & Sunny in a 3-way Mudbowl match... Sable challenges XPW Remixed champion Trish Stratus to a title match... **
**Xtreme Rulez Death Match **
Thumbtack Jack def. Sami Callihan (DVD onto pile of syringes)
** CUT **
_________________________________________________________________
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Tazz is spotted backstage with his gear, pulling his luggage cart towards the parking lot… despite Muldoon’s earlier decree about competing again tonight - Tazz does as he pleases! He’s done competing tonight! F[edited] The World!
** CUT TO VIDEO **
** Damage Inc 2 results **
** CUT TO RING **
ROB VAN DAM versus DAVID OTUNGA
versus
David Otunga’s vain, narcissistic entrance is preceded by RVD’s rousing pro-marijuana Television entrance… commentators cover the FOCUS/RVD “Hollywood script vs. Abstract freeform” feud that climaxed with Gorgeous George Wagner (1950) being shaved bald in the center of the ring (see “DI2”)… this is the 2nd time Otunga and RVD have clashed on the XPW Remixed stage, but Otunga doesn’t have the benefit of claiming “unprepared” tonight… Commissioner Muldoon gave him a week to get ready and he still loses in relatively short order… the “pro rasslin” drama is played out at the end when Otunga finally gets the brief advantage - and tries calling out to the back for assistance… but a hood-wearing Gorgeous George won’t budge from his dressing room! He REFUSES to show his bald head in public! Otunga is deserted and foiled! 5-Star Frog splash from RVD seals the deal like a lick of honey…
Winner: ROB VAN DAM
** MATCH SEGUE **
JINDER MAHAL interrupts RVD’s victory celebration… much like the closing days of his feud with Great Gama, Jinder Mahal accuses RVD of the most horrible of all sportz-related sins… PED’s! RVD is on Performance Enhancing Drugs! THC! These outrageous accusations and threats of criminal lawsuits immediately draw out XPW Remixed commission WILLIAM MULDOON!
As an official he is forced to recognize Jinder Mahal’s grievances, but until formal testing can be completed, Jinder Mahal’s charges are just heresy and allegations… but they certainly outrage the reigning XPW TV champion RVD (and his platoon of pot-puffing fans behind him)… after it seems Muldoon has once again laid down the law - we get a 2nd interruption… MATT MORGAN & “Nature Boy” BUDDY ROGERS!
They too have a HUGE bone to pick with Muldoon over his last minute change to their match at “DI2” that wound up costing them a cool million bucks! They go about trying to strong-arm THEIR way into the already-crowded XPW TV title scene as well - until a popular theme song finally cuts them off… enter SHEAMUS (2012)!!
The affable Irish homeboy is all cheers and grins after his victory at “DI2” - which incidentally has only yielded $250k and NOT the full milly as specified… yet - but Sheamus does indeed plan on getting paid and full, which is why he has a lean placed on Morgan/Rogers that says a portion of every victory purse must go to Sheamus until his million dollar debt is paid! Who’s the slave and master now?? Everybody is itching for action, and since everything is going to Hell already, Muldoon makes the 6-man tag match now! RVD, Sheamus & MIL MASCARAS (pop) versus Jinder Mahal & Matt Morgan… and what was SUPPOSED to be Taz, but since he decided to no-show it will be a handi… and we’re cut off by the final interruption of the segment - reigning XPW Boston champion SHANE DOUGLAS and his valet LIZZY BORDEN!
Douglas cuts another shoot promo on being "ignored" and "disrespected" by the XPW Remixed brass, despite holding the highly coveted XPW Boston championship... and since Douglas isn't booked tonight for some strange reason - he's taking it upon himself to fill Taz spot after his walk out! Shane Douglas is booking himself into the 6-man tag team match! Coming up next!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
SHEAMUS, RVD © & MIL MASCARAS
versus
MATT MORGAN (w/ Buddy Rogers), JINDER MAHAL
& SHANE DOUGLAS © (w/ Lizzy Borden)
vs.
Good guys work together - bad guys can't - so they lose... all 6 men get a chance to get their spots off in accelerated fashion until Sheamus runs over Mahal with a Brogue Kick and RVD pins him with another 5-star frog splash... the good prevail, but post match both Sheamus & Mil Mascaras make their individual intentions clear by making the universal "the belt is coming around my waist" gesture directed towards TV Champion RVD - who gleefully welcomes all the challengers...
Winners: RVD, SHEAMUS & MIL MASCARAS
** CUT **
_______________________________________________________________
** HYPE **
**Mildred Burke promo introducing her training partner “ROWDY” RONDA ROUSEY! The two exist together to co-promote women in MMA and combat sports - both being the absolute best in their respective genre… Burke has been training extra hard ever since her “loss” to Ad Santel and is making an open challenge on the next XPW TV Episode to any MALE COMPETITOR in the locker room! Burke + Rousey = a union of epic proportions! **
"Rowdy" Ronda Rousey (Strikeforce 135lb champion)
is in Mildred Burke's corner!
** CUT **
** Cali Crippler Head Coach Ad Santel speaks briefly with MSD… Santel has proven his superiority in XPW Remixed and redeemed himself as a head trainer… but he still has a bad taste in his mouth from his loss to the Shooters Club in their “Best of 7 Series” months ago… now Ad Santel already *declined* meeting Shooters Club veteran Dan Severn in a match, citing “weight class differences”… and reminds you the Shooters Club aren't even in the building tonight... but Ad Santel is NO coward - and has plans to make his next move… TONIGHT… **
** CUT **
** Backstage confrontation continues between RVD and an angry Jinder Mahal - who continues to accuse RVD or PED abusage… when suddenly DAMIEN SANDOW & his manager Wild Red Berry saunter into the scene! They too have some cocky, condescending words for RVD and others of his ilk that cheat to win… Mahal & Sandow are surrounding RVD… until Commissioner Muldoon shows up to cool things off… he sets up a tag team match for next XPW TV Episode… Jinder Mahal & Damien Sandow versus RVD &… but before Muldoon can name a partner, RVD cuts him off and says “don’t worry, I know just the guy to be partner next week”… RVD throws a mean glare @ Sandow & Mahal and exits stage left… Who will RVD pick to be his tag team partner? Find out next XPW TV Episode! **
** CUT **
Prime Time Playaz promo that alternates between hilarious absurdity and schoolyard braggadocio... Kaos is the World Champions Wrestling man cuz he made the WCW champion HIS BITCH - and together, he and Titus O'Neil are gonna get... "MILLIONS OF DOLLARS! MILLIONS OF DOLLARS!"...
** CUT **
Promo from the XPW Remixed Woman's champion Trish Stratus - she came here to compete because it's the most competitive woman's wrestling pool in fantasy wrestling history - and Trish Stratus is the greatest female wrestler of all time... she doesn't care if her next opponent is Sable, Awesome Kong or somebody else... Trish Stratus is a fighting champion!
** CUT **
________________________________________________________________
COLT CABANA (2012) versus
GUNNER (2014) w/ Jessica Darlin
versus w/
Competitive squash with the former NWA champion (2012) Colt "Boom Boom" Cabana ultimately falling to Gunner's devestating F5 finisher (after a Jessica Darlin lowblow)... it's what happens after that match that is so "controversial", in typical XPW Remixed fashion... Gunner & Darlin get a live mic and go berzerk keeping censors fingertips busy until they have to abruptly cut to commercial!
Winner: GUNNER
Gunner is president of the woman haters club and lets his sexist, misogynistic bile spew... what's worse than his degradation, is his valet Jessica Darlin - who agrees wholeheartily and has some harsh words for some of her contemporary fantasy wrestling divas... a world Gunner & Darlin compare to that of pornography...
JESSICA DARLIN: We hate the overall commercialization of porn and fantasy wrestling and what it’s doing to the business. From website whores to softcore ice queens you have a bunch of people using the word porn-star to describe themselves. Excuse me... "Internet models & Adult film actresses".. More and more the girls getting in this business are using it as a stepping stone to what they think is legitimacy. Being on FOX’S "SKIN" or wrestling in ROH doesn’t erase how you got there: WITH A C[edited]K IN YOUR MOUTH! I’m looking for the people who get IT. The ones who don’t see roles to act in and box covers to increase their feature dance rates. What happened to the exhibitionist? Or the slut who just can’t get enough? We know who we are and we’re a dying breed... (sensually caresses Gunner's chest and goes on to explain why she calls him "Gunner"... beforewarned NSFW)
I believe you should profit from your work in this business but don’t make it your reason for getting here... The business is breeding prostitutes looking for a paycheck & fame versus sluts getting paid for doing what they love... Ahhhh, Gunner... No that’s what I should have said about the reason I returned! You can always count on the vets to make you cum! Gunner has one of the cocks that made me addicted to this business. He’s an incredible performer who can rough you up just right. Coming back and working with him makes this long career worth every shot in the mouth!
As far as interesting I’d like to report that my ass is still in great shape after all the cock. When Gunner got in there the last thing I worried about is whether he’d tear me up. I just wanted more! I’m glad you enjoyed it! There’s a girl who’s enjoying everything you can get from this business. Except that she’s the real deal! A truly sexual girl who can lead this business back into the gutter with me! I never played to the porn populist. If all the work I did meant the few awards I received than so be it. They just don’t like us Extreme girls. They should look at the sex part of that scene no matter the company. That craps corrupt and I’m not. Fuck your awards! I love cum in my mouth, a dick in my ass, and a twat on my face! That’s my reward. Fuck your lead roles and your box covers. I’ll take filler and fucking parts all day...
** ABRUPT CUT!! **
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
________________________________________________________________
** Main Event **
Del Rio (heralded by Ricardo Rodriguez) enters first... Thesz enters last with much pomp and fanfare... he finally takes the mic to announce the special guest enforcer for this match... the man, the myth, the legend and undefeated champion... the greatest of all time
The Brockton Blockbuster
ROCKY MARCIANO!!
(huge crowd pop - angry Del Rio reaction - excitable commentator chatter)
** XPW World Championship **
LOU THESZ © versus ALBERTO DEL RIO
versus w/
Referee
These two match up very well, size and science wise… Del Rio is just a bit more anxious, and the presence of Ricardo Rodriguez and referee Danny Davis solidify that desperation… Lots of hold/counter-hold/reversals to start, and the two men match each other hold for hold… Thesz works the wrist of Del Rio hard, earning a few one counts… Del Rio with a big side headlock takedown on Thesz, but Lou counters and power bombs Del Rio right into the corner turnbuckle! Thesz pressures the left arm of Del Rio and attacks with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex and flying hammerlock… after being somewhat even to start the match, Thesz has blown past Del Rio on the past few exchanges… Thesz with a go-behind into a German suplex and another close 2 count… Del Rio tries for a desperation face rake, but when he comes back with a flying énziguri attempt - Thesz ducks and locks his deadly STF on Del Rio in the center of the ring! Del Rio TAPS OUT within seconds, even if it appears the referee (Danny Davis) was slightly hesitant to acknowledge it…
Winner of Fall #1 (by submission): LOU THESZ
Referee Danny Davis pulls Thesz off and takes an extra long time admonishing him for not breaking the hold sooner… and Del Rio uses the momentary distraction to attack Thesz from behind… he hit’s a double knee breaker to Lou’s arm and goes immediately to work on the appendage… figure-4 arm lock but Thesz rolls out… so Del Rio counters with an arm scissors takedown into a wristlock - but still can’t get his actual finisher applied… on commentary Striker says Thesz has been training with his Shooters Club day and night for counters to Del Rio’s arm breaker… Del Rio continues to work on Thesz’s left arm.. Thesz powers to his feet, but Del Rio uses a hair-pull to arm drag him back into a wristlock… They have another exciting scramble on the mat, and Thesz sneaks Del Rio into a small package… 1!.. 2!.. Del Rio shifts positions and puts Lou’s shoulders on the mat… 1!.. 2! (Thesz lifts his shoulder) 3!! (??) What? YES! Referee’s decision is final and he awards the pin fall victory to Del Rio! Thesz did NOT get his shoulder up in time!
Winner of Fall #2 (by pin fall): ALBERTO DEL RIO
Now the jig is up, and Thesz is irate in confronting Davis - thus allowing Del Rio another sneak attack advantage - but this time Thesz is ready and goes old school on the Mexican aristocrat… explosive overhead belly-to-belly suplex… hiptosses… hurling dropkicks… Thesz follows up with a huge clothesline, but hurts his injured arm on the exchange… Rodriguez looks to aid in some kind of interference (another pipe attempt perhaps?) but the always alert Rocky Marciano (he would catch flies with his bare hands in uptown Brockton diners for fun) is in the mix to scare him off and get big cheers! Del Rio even takes a few precious moments to scream at Rocky from the ring, but the “Brockton Blockbuster” don’t back down and just points to his chin as if to say “Go ahead, try and hit me!” Del Rio doesn’t take the bait, but turns right around into a Lou Thesz drop toehold in the center of the ring! Thesz is scrambling into position for his STF finisher! But somehow in the fight - the referee Danny Davis gets caught in the eye with an errant elbow! He staggers away, momentarily blinded! At that moment, Thesz ducks a swing from Del Rio - propels him off the ropes with an Irish whip (shout out Danno O’Mahoney!) - and catches Del Rio with a pinpoint Thesz press! 1!.. 2!.. 3!.. The crowd counts aloud! But not referee Danny Davis, who is still staggering around favoring his “eye”!!
Thesz immediately rolls off to angrily confront Davis, but is snagged from the rear by Del Rio - and TRAPPED IN THE ARMLOCK! NOW all the sudden Davis recuperates and is eager to ring the bell in Del Rio’s favor! But Thesz doesn’t quit! Instead he muscles all the way to the ropes to earn a (delayed) break… enter end segment… out of desperation, Del Rio calls for the pipe from Ricardo - that he slides in the ring… but Rocky runs around the side and winds up SOCKING Ricardo in the jaw - knocking him out instantly! But now the pipe is in play - Del Rio SWINGS and MISSES Thesz - gets reversed - and BONKED with the pipe at the hands of a vindictive Thesz! Del Rio crashes to the mat in a heap! Thesz on him for the cover… when all the sudden, Danny’s “eye” starts acting up again and he staggers away from the action! So muthaphuckking Rocky Marciano slides into the ring and counts the pinfall himself! 1!.. 2!.. 3!! THESZ RETAINS THE TITLE! Rocky raises his arm and the belt! Danny Davis tries to confront Marciano after the match - even angrily sticking his finger in his chest! So Rocky Marciano SOCKS him in the face too! Davis goes cold like HBK and Tyson at the end of Wrestlemania 14! Thesz & Rocky Marciano - two heavyweight champions of the WORLD - celebrate in the ring to end the show!
Winner (and STILL XPW World champion): LOU THESZ
ROCKY MARCIANO WILL BE RETURNING TO BROCKTON MA ON SEPTEMBER 23rd 2012 AND YOUR BOY MSD WILL BE THERE TO CHRONICLE THE ENTIRE EVENT! KEEP ONE LIT AND IN THE AIR FOR THE GREATEST OF ALL TIME!
** FADE OUT **
Then the horror unfolds for the live viewer - and those at home who caught the internet clips...
** Rob Black & Toots Mondt came to the ring with uniformed police officers and had Rocky Marciano criminally escorted from the building! (for striking an official) **
** When Thesz actually made a lunge for Black - the set up became apparent... through the crowd, 4 figures beseiged the ring and attacked Thesz! It's... Ad Santel and his Cali Cripplers!! Oh my, the former mentor turned fantasy wrestling blood rival Ad Santel has sought his vengeance with this brutal attack! He directs the Uso Bros (with Tamina) to execute stereo top rope splashes to Thesz - hurting (maybe breaking) his ribs... then Santel locks in a devestating Regal stretch to make sure... Santel has declared his intentions and his bid to be #1 contender has been signed off by Rob Black & Toots Mondt! **
New #1 contender to challenge Thesz next week...
AD SANTEL!
** CUT **
_______________________________________________________________
XPW Remixed presents...
"The 18th Letter"
Coming at the end of September to iPPV!!
** FADE OUT **
___________________________________________________________
CREDITS:
JESSICA DARLIN: Pornstar Interview(2003)
versus w/
Competitive squash with the former NWA champion (2012) Colt "Boom Boom" Cabana ultimately falling to Gunner's devestating F5 finisher (after a Jessica Darlin lowblow)... it's what happens after that match that is so "controversial", in typical XPW Remixed fashion... Gunner & Darlin get a live mic and go berzerk keeping censors fingertips busy until they have to abruptly cut to commercial!
Winner: GUNNER
Gunner is president of the woman haters club and lets his sexist, misogynistic bile spew... what's worse than his degradation, is his valet Jessica Darlin - who agrees wholeheartily and has some harsh words for some of her contemporary fantasy wrestling divas... a world Gunner & Darlin compare to that of pornography...
JESSICA DARLIN: We hate the overall commercialization of porn and fantasy wrestling and what it’s doing to the business. From website whores to softcore ice queens you have a bunch of people using the word porn-star to describe themselves. Excuse me... "Internet models & Adult film actresses".. More and more the girls getting in this business are using it as a stepping stone to what they think is legitimacy. Being on FOX’S "SKIN" or wrestling in ROH doesn’t erase how you got there: WITH A C[edited]K IN YOUR MOUTH! I’m looking for the people who get IT. The ones who don’t see roles to act in and box covers to increase their feature dance rates. What happened to the exhibitionist? Or the slut who just can’t get enough? We know who we are and we’re a dying breed... (sensually caresses Gunner's chest and goes on to explain why she calls him "Gunner"... beforewarned NSFW)
I believe you should profit from your work in this business but don’t make it your reason for getting here... The business is breeding prostitutes looking for a paycheck & fame versus sluts getting paid for doing what they love... Ahhhh, Gunner... No that’s what I should have said about the reason I returned! You can always count on the vets to make you cum! Gunner has one of the cocks that made me addicted to this business. He’s an incredible performer who can rough you up just right. Coming back and working with him makes this long career worth every shot in the mouth!
As far as interesting I’d like to report that my ass is still in great shape after all the cock. When Gunner got in there the last thing I worried about is whether he’d tear me up. I just wanted more! I’m glad you enjoyed it! There’s a girl who’s enjoying everything you can get from this business. Except that she’s the real deal! A truly sexual girl who can lead this business back into the gutter with me! I never played to the porn populist. If all the work I did meant the few awards I received than so be it. They just don’t like us Extreme girls. They should look at the sex part of that scene no matter the company. That craps corrupt and I’m not. Fuck your awards! I love cum in my mouth, a dick in my ass, and a twat on my face! That’s my reward. Fuck your lead roles and your box covers. I’ll take filler and fucking parts all day...
** ABRUPT CUT!! **
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
________________________________________________________________
** Main Event **
Del Rio (heralded by Ricardo Rodriguez) enters first... Thesz enters last with much pomp and fanfare... he finally takes the mic to announce the special guest enforcer for this match... the man, the myth, the legend and undefeated champion... the greatest of all time
The Brockton Blockbuster
ROCKY MARCIANO!!
(huge crowd pop - angry Del Rio reaction - excitable commentator chatter)
** XPW World Championship **
LOU THESZ © versus ALBERTO DEL RIO
versus w/
Referee
These two match up very well, size and science wise… Del Rio is just a bit more anxious, and the presence of Ricardo Rodriguez and referee Danny Davis solidify that desperation… Lots of hold/counter-hold/reversals to start, and the two men match each other hold for hold… Thesz works the wrist of Del Rio hard, earning a few one counts… Del Rio with a big side headlock takedown on Thesz, but Lou counters and power bombs Del Rio right into the corner turnbuckle! Thesz pressures the left arm of Del Rio and attacks with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex and flying hammerlock… after being somewhat even to start the match, Thesz has blown past Del Rio on the past few exchanges… Thesz with a go-behind into a German suplex and another close 2 count… Del Rio tries for a desperation face rake, but when he comes back with a flying énziguri attempt - Thesz ducks and locks his deadly STF on Del Rio in the center of the ring! Del Rio TAPS OUT within seconds, even if it appears the referee (Danny Davis) was slightly hesitant to acknowledge it…
Winner of Fall #1 (by submission): LOU THESZ
Referee Danny Davis pulls Thesz off and takes an extra long time admonishing him for not breaking the hold sooner… and Del Rio uses the momentary distraction to attack Thesz from behind… he hit’s a double knee breaker to Lou’s arm and goes immediately to work on the appendage… figure-4 arm lock but Thesz rolls out… so Del Rio counters with an arm scissors takedown into a wristlock - but still can’t get his actual finisher applied… on commentary Striker says Thesz has been training with his Shooters Club day and night for counters to Del Rio’s arm breaker… Del Rio continues to work on Thesz’s left arm.. Thesz powers to his feet, but Del Rio uses a hair-pull to arm drag him back into a wristlock… They have another exciting scramble on the mat, and Thesz sneaks Del Rio into a small package… 1!.. 2!.. Del Rio shifts positions and puts Lou’s shoulders on the mat… 1!.. 2! (Thesz lifts his shoulder) 3!! (??) What? YES! Referee’s decision is final and he awards the pin fall victory to Del Rio! Thesz did NOT get his shoulder up in time!
Winner of Fall #2 (by pin fall): ALBERTO DEL RIO
Now the jig is up, and Thesz is irate in confronting Davis - thus allowing Del Rio another sneak attack advantage - but this time Thesz is ready and goes old school on the Mexican aristocrat… explosive overhead belly-to-belly suplex… hiptosses… hurling dropkicks… Thesz follows up with a huge clothesline, but hurts his injured arm on the exchange… Rodriguez looks to aid in some kind of interference (another pipe attempt perhaps?) but the always alert Rocky Marciano (he would catch flies with his bare hands in uptown Brockton diners for fun) is in the mix to scare him off and get big cheers! Del Rio even takes a few precious moments to scream at Rocky from the ring, but the “Brockton Blockbuster” don’t back down and just points to his chin as if to say “Go ahead, try and hit me!” Del Rio doesn’t take the bait, but turns right around into a Lou Thesz drop toehold in the center of the ring! Thesz is scrambling into position for his STF finisher! But somehow in the fight - the referee Danny Davis gets caught in the eye with an errant elbow! He staggers away, momentarily blinded! At that moment, Thesz ducks a swing from Del Rio - propels him off the ropes with an Irish whip (shout out Danno O’Mahoney!) - and catches Del Rio with a pinpoint Thesz press! 1!.. 2!.. 3!.. The crowd counts aloud! But not referee Danny Davis, who is still staggering around favoring his “eye”!!
Thesz immediately rolls off to angrily confront Davis, but is snagged from the rear by Del Rio - and TRAPPED IN THE ARMLOCK! NOW all the sudden Davis recuperates and is eager to ring the bell in Del Rio’s favor! But Thesz doesn’t quit! Instead he muscles all the way to the ropes to earn a (delayed) break… enter end segment… out of desperation, Del Rio calls for the pipe from Ricardo - that he slides in the ring… but Rocky runs around the side and winds up SOCKING Ricardo in the jaw - knocking him out instantly! But now the pipe is in play - Del Rio SWINGS and MISSES Thesz - gets reversed - and BONKED with the pipe at the hands of a vindictive Thesz! Del Rio crashes to the mat in a heap! Thesz on him for the cover… when all the sudden, Danny’s “eye” starts acting up again and he staggers away from the action! So muthaphuckking Rocky Marciano slides into the ring and counts the pinfall himself! 1!.. 2!.. 3!! THESZ RETAINS THE TITLE! Rocky raises his arm and the belt! Danny Davis tries to confront Marciano after the match - even angrily sticking his finger in his chest! So Rocky Marciano SOCKS him in the face too! Davis goes cold like HBK and Tyson at the end of Wrestlemania 14! Thesz & Rocky Marciano - two heavyweight champions of the WORLD - celebrate in the ring to end the show!
Winner (and STILL XPW World champion): LOU THESZ
ROCKY MARCIANO WILL BE RETURNING TO BROCKTON MA ON SEPTEMBER 23rd 2012 AND YOUR BOY MSD WILL BE THERE TO CHRONICLE THE ENTIRE EVENT! KEEP ONE LIT AND IN THE AIR FOR THE GREATEST OF ALL TIME!
** FADE OUT **
Then the horror unfolds for the live viewer - and those at home who caught the internet clips...
** Rob Black & Toots Mondt came to the ring with uniformed police officers and had Rocky Marciano criminally escorted from the building! (for striking an official) **
** When Thesz actually made a lunge for Black - the set up became apparent... through the crowd, 4 figures beseiged the ring and attacked Thesz! It's... Ad Santel and his Cali Cripplers!! Oh my, the former mentor turned fantasy wrestling blood rival Ad Santel has sought his vengeance with this brutal attack! He directs the Uso Bros (with Tamina) to execute stereo top rope splashes to Thesz - hurting (maybe breaking) his ribs... then Santel locks in a devestating Regal stretch to make sure... Santel has declared his intentions and his bid to be #1 contender has been signed off by Rob Black & Toots Mondt! **
New #1 contender to challenge Thesz next week...
AD SANTEL!
** CUT **
_______________________________________________________________
XPW Remixed presents...
"The 18th Letter"
Coming at the end of September to iPPV!!
** FADE OUT **
___________________________________________________________
CREDITS:
JESSICA DARLIN: Pornstar Interview(2003)