Post by Leo on Mar 7, 2022 21:25:24 GMT -5
CCW Wednesday Warfare: Episode 30
Commentators: Bob Caudle and Shane McMahon
Ring Announcer: Mike McGuirk
Interviewer: SoCal Val
Referees: Tommy Young, Joey Marella and Aubrey Edwards
Dutch Mantel is still out and Andy Kaufman got called back to Hollywood, so Shane McMahon is on commentary again. They preview the upcoming show.
CM Punk in a non-title match defeated Bobby Fulton by pinfall via Go 2 Sleep at 7:23. SoCal Val gets Punk post match.
“Last week, I said I’m either going on first or last. This week I chose first and I chose to wrestle a jobber with no business being in the ring with me. Why? To prove that I am the face that runs this place. I do what I want when I want. Now, this is where I’m supposed to say Marc Mero is underrated and I respect him as a challenger at March Madness, but I’m not going to do that, because I don’t believe it and I choose not play the standard games. Mero lucked into the greatest opportunity he’s ever had in wrestling and in the ring with me is where his luck runs out.”
COMMERCIAL
Proud and Powerful (Santana and Ortiz) defeated Kamp Kaufman (Big Bossman and Yokozuna) in 10:12 via pinfall of Ortiz on Bossman via Street Sweeper. Edding Kingston is with SoCal Val after the match.
“What you saw in the ring just now is what the Undisputed Era can expect at March Madness. PWX thinks they pulled a slick move last week by mixing everything around like some shell game. I’m from the streets and I could always smell that con from a mile away. And even though all my friends told me never to play the game, because I knew the fix was in, I played anyway. Because, if I couldn’t find the queen I knew that son of a bitch had it hidden up his sleeve and I’d yank it out and slam the conman through his makeshift table. You don’t screw over Eddie Kingston. Everyone who has tried, has failed. Kurt Angle, you want me to step up to the table and play three card monte with you as dealer? Let’s play, mf’er.”
COMMERCIAL
“The Immortal” Hulk Hogan defeated “Junkyard Shiek” Rok Wyler in 5:38 by pinfall via big boot and leg drop. SoCal Val talks with Hogan after the match.
“Billy Graham was out here running his mouth, calling the Hulkster an imposter of the Superstar, brother. Well, SuperstarMania was never a deal, dude. There aren’t 5.82 million SuperstarManiacs around the world saying their vitamins and taking their prayers instead of tripping on marijuana pills, jack. Billy Graham might be jacked and stacked, but he doesn’t have these 37-inch pythons, brother (Hogan rips his shirt and flexes. He put a new one on after the match just so he can rip it.). You want to see who’s got the best body, brother, let’s have a posedown next week. Because whatcha gonna do when the Hulkamania, not SuperstarMania, runs wild on you.”
COMMERCIAL
“Lionheart” Chris Jericho, “Mega Man” Tom Magee and “Rowdy” Ronda Rousey defeated Mickie James-Aldis and the York Foundation (Martin Jannetty and Nicholas Nemeth) by pinfall of Jericho on Jannetty via Breakdown at 13:40. Post-match, Mickie berates Nemeth and Jannetty, saying her husband, leader of the York Foundation, Nicholas Aldis, will be there next week to address their poor performances. As she shrilly screeches, Rousey spins James around and gives her the Piper’s Pit.
Carmella is readying for a match in the back when “Hot Mess” Chelsea Green comes up and teases Carmella. Does she think she can go a whole match without being on her cell phone? Carmella doesn’t have to tweet her life to the world, she chooses too and the world chooses to watch. Green is just drinking the hater-ade like everybody else and it’s never got to Carmella before and it won’t now. Carmella does the talk to the hand gesture, while making sure to capture it with her phone, and then walks off.
COMMERCIAL
“Marvelous” Marc Mero defeated Ron “The Truth” Killings by pinfall via Wild Thing at 12:50. Mero talks with SoCal Val afterward.
“A lot of people are saying I don’t deserve a CCW World Title shot against CM Punk at March Madness. I lucked into it by some sort of comedy switcheroo by PWX to prove they run CCW, despite what Andy Kaufman might protest. I ran through the CCW Gulf Coast Title tournament and gave Kurt Angle one of the best matches he’s had in recent memory. I have always earned everything I’ve received in wrestling and I’ve never said a word about the bad that has happened; by fate, luck or design of others. CM Punk wants to laugh at me and look past me. Do it, fine, you’ll pay the price, (shows his fist) because this is a Kiss that Don’t Miss.”
COMMERCIAL
In the back, Col. Robert Fuller is on the phone with who we can guess is Andy Kaufman. It appears that Kaufman was drawn back to Hollywood under false pretenses. When he showed up on the Warner Bros. lot, they knew nothing about him reading for Batman. Fuller tells Kaufman they don’t book his acting gigs. Kaufman promises to be back in time for Wednesday Warfare. Ivory comes up and she and Fuller share a look.
“Sensational” Sherri Martel defeated Carmella by pinfall via top rope sunset flip at 6:23. While celebrating, Charlotte Flair runs out and attacks Sherri from behind, but Sherri fights her off. Sherri gets a microphone and says she took the match today as a tune up, since she’s been managing more than wrestling lately. But she’s got more than enough to take on Charlotte Flair and challenges her to a match at March Madness. Charlotte, from the floor, agrees, but only if Tessa Blanchard is at ringside, so she can see what Flair does to Sherri. And Flair doesn’t care if Blanchard is in a full body cast, strapped to a hospital bed, to be there.
COMMERCIAL
Kurt Angle in a non-title bout defeated “The Man with the Hands of Stone” Ronnie Garvin by pinfall via Angle Slam at 17:08.
Post-match Angle puts Garvin in the ankle lock and won’t let go. Kingston runs out with a chair to chase Angle off, but is jumped from behind by Punk, but then Marc Mero comes out to save the save. All four men brawl, but Shane McMahon calls them off and books a tag match for next week of Punk and Angle vs. Kingston and Mero. Wait, does he have the power to do that? He’s sure management will be okay with it. After all, he’s just trying to help.
All rights reserved. Andy Kaufman Enterprises. 1980-something.