Post by Joe on Sept 20, 2018 11:46:49 GMT -5
ALTERNATIVE PRO WRESTLING
LIVE FROM CLEVELAND, OHIO
This show is pretty much being broken up into two parts in some sort of way. TV magic, editing, whatever. I'm only writing four matches at a time, and the card isn't really what was advertised. I think I put a disclaimer that the card was subject to change, and the one person that probably looked at that card was probably excited to see (read: read) some matches that probably got cut because... well, I just want to write with the guys I want to write with and don't really want to pander and write matches I think will "draw" but not necessarily make me motivated to do this. I've been doing this for about two decades now. I know what I like, and I know what sells, but this is strictly about what I like and that's what I'm putting out there. There's nothing else like this, and let's all be grateful for that.
BRAUN STROWMAN, WE'RE COMING FOR YOU!
Well, not really and, if I'm being honest, I'm not even sure if he's still the champion of the Mash-Up Universe. I would like to book him, or any World champion, at some point, but I'd actually have to get to the point in a promotion I'm running where I feel like I actually built somebody up who's worthy of competing on that level. This is hopefully the start of that long and arduous process.
We've got some of my favorite indie wrestlers of all time filling out this card, and in all actuality, these four matches. My favorite being Chris Dickinson, and Jimmy Jacobs is really right up there. He's so versatile, it's great. Some other guys I've been doing a lot of work with over the years, like Drew Gulak, who is great. Why he hasn't been signed anywhere is such a mystery to me, I'm really feeling hesitant to point out this miscarriage of justice, because I'd like to keep using him. However, I really hate having a dedicated roster, at this point. Something doesn't feel right about it. I love trying to get the most out of the guys nobody else saw worthy of placing on their rosters.
How a guy like Brian Kendrick goes for so long without showing up on RAW or Nitro or in the NWA or even on Lucha Underground is astonishing to me, but I'll take full advantage of that, because I remember. I'm old enough to remember when he was the bigger, more exciting star than even Bryan Danielson or Christopher Daniels, and Ring of Honor was really built around him as a top babyface. I'm old enough to remember when a guy like Reckless Youth was way ahead of his time, cracking the PWI's Top 100 wrestlers in the world while never really wrestling for a major promotion.
And thus, here we are. This is where we begin. Let the opening theme play, and let's do this thing. I'm sacrificing some valuable nap time for this.
LIVE FROM CLEVELAND, OHIO
This show is pretty much being broken up into two parts in some sort of way. TV magic, editing, whatever. I'm only writing four matches at a time, and the card isn't really what was advertised. I think I put a disclaimer that the card was subject to change, and the one person that probably looked at that card was probably excited to see (read: read) some matches that probably got cut because... well, I just want to write with the guys I want to write with and don't really want to pander and write matches I think will "draw" but not necessarily make me motivated to do this. I've been doing this for about two decades now. I know what I like, and I know what sells, but this is strictly about what I like and that's what I'm putting out there. There's nothing else like this, and let's all be grateful for that.
BRAUN STROWMAN, WE'RE COMING FOR YOU!
Well, not really and, if I'm being honest, I'm not even sure if he's still the champion of the Mash-Up Universe. I would like to book him, or any World champion, at some point, but I'd actually have to get to the point in a promotion I'm running where I feel like I actually built somebody up who's worthy of competing on that level. This is hopefully the start of that long and arduous process.
We've got some of my favorite indie wrestlers of all time filling out this card, and in all actuality, these four matches. My favorite being Chris Dickinson, and Jimmy Jacobs is really right up there. He's so versatile, it's great. Some other guys I've been doing a lot of work with over the years, like Drew Gulak, who is great. Why he hasn't been signed anywhere is such a mystery to me, I'm really feeling hesitant to point out this miscarriage of justice, because I'd like to keep using him. However, I really hate having a dedicated roster, at this point. Something doesn't feel right about it. I love trying to get the most out of the guys nobody else saw worthy of placing on their rosters.
How a guy like Brian Kendrick goes for so long without showing up on RAW or Nitro or in the NWA or even on Lucha Underground is astonishing to me, but I'll take full advantage of that, because I remember. I'm old enough to remember when he was the bigger, more exciting star than even Bryan Danielson or Christopher Daniels, and Ring of Honor was really built around him as a top babyface. I'm old enough to remember when a guy like Reckless Youth was way ahead of his time, cracking the PWI's Top 100 wrestlers in the world while never really wrestling for a major promotion.
And thus, here we are. This is where we begin. Let the opening theme play, and let's do this thing. I'm sacrificing some valuable nap time for this.
Jimmy Jacobs vs. Reckless Youth
Jacobs is full on into his "Emo Warrior" phase in this contest, while we have Reckless Youth here at about 2000 or 2001, while he was pretty much at the end of his peak. Jacobs cuts a promo before the match, talking down to Reckless Youth and talking about his own personal strife. Jacobs talks about his youth was tainted by pain, betrayal, and rejection, while Youth has been living as the "indie darling" who everybody admires and respects. "The King of the Indies" he is called... but all empires come an end, and Jacobs says his rage and turmoil will lead to his downfall!
With that, Youth has heard enough and kicks Jacobs in the gut and then lights him up with a few knife edged chops, getting cheers from the crowd. Youth tries to keep the pace up, catching Jacobs with a headscissors takedown, followed by a Calf Kick, and then hitting a Spinning Neckbreaker, attempting to end this early, but Jacobs kicks out! Youth tries to get Jacobs back to his feet, but Jacobs gauges at his eyes and begins to choke him with both hands, yelling out in a primal manner! The ref interjects, and Jacobs lets go, only to knee Youth and then choke him against the ropes, earning another five count and a warning from the referee! Youth is coughing and choking, stumbling away, and Jacobs tries to stay on the attack, grabbing him from behind and spinning him, taking him down with a Cutter! Jacobs thinks he has it, hooking the leg, but Youth kicks out! Jacobs wails on him with closed fists before getting to his feet, covering his ears as the fans boo and yelling at them, before turning and crouching down. He's looking for a Spear now, maybe... and Youth is up, and Jacobs is rushing in. Youth manages to side step the Spear, and grabs Jacobs, sending him to the outside! Jacobs is on the floor momentarily, but stumbles up, wobbly. Youth has an opening here and gets on the apron... he points up and brings the crowd into it, before leaping and delivering an ASAI MOONSAULT! Perfect form there! Youth recovers a bit and then grabs Jacobs, but Jacobs delivers a low blow! DDT on the padded floor here, and Jacobs is back in control! Big BOOOOOOS from the crowd! Jacobs pulls up the padding... MY GOD, WHAT IS HE DOING!? Oh, we know what he's doing. He's making good on his promise earlier, and he's got Youth in position now. He hoists him up and delivers a PILEDRIVER ON THE EXPOSED CONCRETE! Jacobs smiles sadistically as the fans are both booing Jacobs and cheering for Youth to persevere! Jacobs sends Youth back into the ring casually, feeling like this match is over. Jacobs heads up to the top rope and then points to Youth, yelling, "YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF!" Jacobs leaps off, looking for the Senton Backsplash, but NO! Youth moves! He's still in this thing! Jimmy holds his back, rolling on the mat in anguish! Jimmy gets to a knee, but Youth is up and he rushes... SHINING WIZARD! Youth covers and the fans are buying in, but NO! Jacobs kicks out! Youth isn't done, though, grabs Jimmy by the hair and lifts him up. Jimmy reaches up and scratches the eyes of Youth and Youth turns away... but then quickly turns back and jumps up, catching Jimmy with an ENZUIGIRI! Jimmy drops to a knee again, his lights nearly turned out there. Youth rubs out his eyes and grabs Jimmy by the hair once more and pulls him in... TWISTING BRAINBUSTER! Jimmy sits up and is floored, his eyes rolling the back of his head! Youth is rolling in a different way, towards the apron. What's he doing now? Youth scales the buckles from the apron and he's got Jacobs in his sights... ART BARR STYLE FROG SPLASH! D'LO BROWN, EAT YOUR HEART OUT! Youth has the leg hooked, and the fans are cheering as the referee counts ONE, TWO, THREE, and the opener has come to a close!
Okay, so that's over...
Onto the next thing.
I want to really go into detail here on this next in ring promo. Spanky is in the ring. This is a circa 2002 incarnation of Spanky, somewhere in there. He's still coming out to "Danger! High Voltage" and the fans are into that. Who isn't into that? It's infectious. But the next guy out is Josh Prohibition, entering to "Firestorm" by Earth Crisis, which is just a great fucking intro song. And he wants to cut a promo here in front of his home crowd. Probably similar to one he's cut many times... probably similar to something you'd see from CM Punk in this era. I don't really care.
We've said it once before and it bears repeating. So here it goes.
"CLEVELAND, OHIO, I'd ask for you all to put down your poisons, try to pull yourselves together and pretend you have a shred of dignity as I address you all tonight... as I address this piece of human garbage across the ring from me. Please, at least pretend to not be completely fucking pathetic. I'll wait."
He waits. They boo.
"Just as I expected. Not a shred of class to be found in this city. A city that should be drown in a world that should be incinerated. And look at this guy across from me; Spanky. Spanky, you've come in here with a big reputation. Everybody loves you..."
Big if true. Seems to be true, as the fans begin cheering Spanky's name. He may be onto something.
"Everybody thinks you're 'fun' and 'energetic', but really, you're just a lost, wayward soul, just like the guy who trained you, Shawn Michaels."
And now we get chants for HBK. Prohibition stops and looks around, shaking his head.
"You see, Spanky, I was like you, once. I loved to have fun, to laugh, to be see the brighter side of life. But it was guys like Shawn Michaels that made me realize the sham this world really is. I remember being in awe of him... watching Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon fighting in ladder matches, revolutionizing the business and thinking, 'Man, I want to be just like him!' And then I find out he's a drug addict... an alcoholic... cheats on his wife... and he's the man that this business, THIS WORLD, puts in front of children and tells them to idolize. The man they want ME to become... and now, just like Shawn Michaels lost his smile, Josh Prohibition has lost his sense of humor... and lost his faith in humanity. And now, Spanky, for all your good times and sunny disposition, you'll be made a martyr for this cause."
Spanky looks incredulous, holding up his hands and then reaches and takes the mic from Josh, laughing.
"Hey, Josh, I think you need to relax, man..."
BOOM! Prohibition kicks Spanky and grabs him up... PROHIBITION PLEX! Prohibition sits in the middle of the ring, looking to the side, breathing heavily, looking enraged as Spanky rolls on the mat. This match begins.
He waits. They boo.
"Just as I expected. Not a shred of class to be found in this city. A city that should be drown in a world that should be incinerated. And look at this guy across from me; Spanky. Spanky, you've come in here with a big reputation. Everybody loves you..."
Big if true. Seems to be true, as the fans begin cheering Spanky's name. He may be onto something.
"Everybody thinks you're 'fun' and 'energetic', but really, you're just a lost, wayward soul, just like the guy who trained you, Shawn Michaels."
And now we get chants for HBK. Prohibition stops and looks around, shaking his head.
"You see, Spanky, I was like you, once. I loved to have fun, to laugh, to be see the brighter side of life. But it was guys like Shawn Michaels that made me realize the sham this world really is. I remember being in awe of him... watching Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon fighting in ladder matches, revolutionizing the business and thinking, 'Man, I want to be just like him!' And then I find out he's a drug addict... an alcoholic... cheats on his wife... and he's the man that this business, THIS WORLD, puts in front of children and tells them to idolize. The man they want ME to become... and now, just like Shawn Michaels lost his smile, Josh Prohibition has lost his sense of humor... and lost his faith in humanity. And now, Spanky, for all your good times and sunny disposition, you'll be made a martyr for this cause."
Spanky looks incredulous, holding up his hands and then reaches and takes the mic from Josh, laughing.
"Hey, Josh, I think you need to relax, man..."
BOOM! Prohibition kicks Spanky and grabs him up... PROHIBITION PLEX! Prohibition sits in the middle of the ring, looking to the side, breathing heavily, looking enraged as Spanky rolls on the mat. This match begins.
Josh Prohibition vs. Spanky
Prohibition pins Spanky into the buckles and is yelling at him before laying into him with repeated knees to the ribs. Prohibition then pulls Spanky onto the corner and tries to hit a German Suplex, but Spanky backflips out of it and lands on his feet... Single Leg Dropkick! Prohibition is really now, as Spanky unloads rapid fire inside elbows, followed by a Swinging DDT off of the ropes! Spanky hooks the leg, but just a two count! Spanky lifts up Prohibition and delivers a Snap Suplex, followed by a chinlock, and he starts yelling at Prohibition! Prohibition fights his way up and blasts Spanky to the midsection with elbows before delivering a Jawbreaker! Spanky bounces back, holding his jaw. Spanky spins and Prohibition pops up, catching him with a big Lariat! Prohibition goes for the cover, but yanks Spanky up at one, and begins blasting him with fists and crossface punches, followed by repeated kneedrops to his back! Prohibition puts a knee to his back and wrenches him back with a modified Camel Clutch and the ref is checking Spanky for the submission. Spanky manages to fight out of the hold but Prohibition lifts him by his arm and whips him off the ropes. Prohibition ducks and Spanky rolls over his back. Prohibition looks shocked and turns, getting caught with a Huracanrana from Spanky, who hooks the legs, but just a two count! Prohibition is back up, but Spanky is ready. Spanky catches him with an Armdrag... and then another Armdrag... Prohibition is stumbling, and Spanky delivers a Spinning Wheel Kick! Spanky goes for the cover again, but still just a two count! Prohibition tries to roll away, but Spanky grabs his arm and utilizes a La Magistral cradle, but Prohibition still kicks out! Prohibition gets to his knees, and Spanky catches him with a Front Dropkick to the face! Spanky gets up, clapping his hands and calling for the end! Spanky grabs Prohibition by the head and goes rushing for the buckles, looking for Sliced Bread #2, but NO! Prohibition shoves him off and chest first into the buckles... OH! LOW KICK TO THE GROIN FROM BEHIND BY PROHIBITION! Prohibition grabs him and drops him with a Reverse DDT over his knee before lifting him and delivering the The Reverse Brainbuster he calls The Straight Edge! Prohibition covers, thinking he has the win, but NO! SPANKY KICKS OUT AT TWO! Prohibition begins to choke Spanky in a rage, before the referee has to break it up! Prohibition stomps Spanky to the head, before pulling his arm and blasting him with downward elbows! Spanky is bleeding over his right eyebrow and looking battered. Prohibition lifts him into a Full Nelson... Spanky is still fighting it, so Prohibition lets go and spins Spanky right into an INSIDE ELBOW STRIKE FROM HELL! Spanky stumbles, his eyes rolling back and he bounces chest first into the ropes. Spanky stumbles back and Prohibition grabs him into the Full Nelson again, this time delivering the DRAGON SUPLEX! Prohibition rolls through it, though, yelling "RESISTANCE IS FUTILE!" He proceeds to pull Spanky backwards while he's on his knees into a Full Nelson submission he calls The Path of Resistance, his knees placed into his shoulder blades and pulling with all of his might! Spanky is bloodied, battered, and is being tortured here, and he has to verbally submit. Josh Prohibition wins it here in after a spirited fight by both men.
Drew Gulak vs. "Speedball" Mike Bailey
I'm probably losing a little steam here, so I'm going to be a little more brief here. Both of these guys are great. Mike Bailey has a such a cool demeanor, as he's not a stereotype at all and brings high octane action when he's in that ring. I really liked the prospect of this match, as Bailey is an accomplished striker, with a lot of grace and impact. He also likes to do flippy high risk shit, which is a great combination and a perfect counter punch to what Drew Gulak brings to the table. I've seen Gulak come off the top before, but he's really not the high flier guy, and in more recent years, his gimmick has been very anti-high flying, so it seemed like a great contrast. Gulak is such a great mat wrestler, with a great arsenal of holds, suplexes, slams, backbreakers, etc., so what we had here was a clash of styles that the fans could get behind. I like the idea of good guy versus bad guy, obviously, as much as I really can. It's not always necessary, but it helps to have a defined heel, even if you respect where they are coming from, you can still boo their methods, and that's what we have here with Gulak. Anybody can respect his talent, but it's his attitude that is off putting and that smugness and superiority that makes you want to see him humbled. Mike Bailey is a great guy to get behind for that, as he just looks like an underdog and fights with everything he has, and he definitely brought that to this contest. Gulak would try to keep this match grounded and tried to beat the life out of Bailey, but "Speedball" doesn't really seem to have any quit in him and Gulak just couldn't figure out how to keep him down. By the end, both men's midsection's would be red and swollen, as Gulak would use chops, headbutts, kneestrikes and open hand shots to try to pummel Bailey, while Bailey had chops, punches, kicks, and knees to answer back in a big way. Bailey's kicking combinations and huge Double Spinning Enzuigiri kick were especially damaging to Gulak. Bailey would manage to end this match with his big finisher after a scuffle up on the top turnbuckle lead to Gulak crashing down to the mat. Bailey would come off the top with his Shooting Star Double Kneesmash, getting a huge pop from the fans and the big victory here tonight with a pinfall over Drew Gulak.
And now, a word from "The Dirty Daddy"!
"TONY DEPPEN, whoever the fuck that is, tonight I've gotta fight you, man. And it's nothin' personal, it's nothing I really, you know, have my heart set on, but I've got to fucking destroy you. That's all there is to it. I've got to send a message to these people, to everybody around here trying to short sell me, take my spot, cause there's a hundred of 'em, and they're all hungry and wanting to eat. I'm from the Shaolin, motherfucker, I fight every day to keep what's mine, and you're trying to take it from me. Fair enough, but now you're fucking dead, okay? Back luck for you, short straw drawn, I don't know how you got here, but I know where it goes from here, and it's only getting worse for you, son."
And, in fairness, we go to Tony Deppen.
"Chris Dickinson has a reputation for being an asshole, and being violent, and he thinks everybody's scared of him. I'm not scared of you, Chris. You're not going to kill anybody but yourself if you try to out work me. I've come here to prove something myself. I came here to prove I belong in this ring with some of the best independent wrestlers in the world. There's so many guys on this show that have bigger names than me, bigger reputations, and yet here I am on the card ahead of them. Some might be wondering why, but I'm here to show everyone that it wasn't a mistake and Tony Deppen is FOR REAL and I'm here to stay."
Okay, let's do the damn thing.
"The Dirty Daddy" Chris Dickinson vs. Tony Deppen
Deppen is very intense, and he has a magnetism about him that makes these fans want to rally behind him. Dickinson is a natural heel, and he knows Deppen is chomping at the bit to get down to haymakers and moonsault and all of that other shit, so he's backing off, and even takes a powder to play mind games with him. Deppen goes chasing "The Dirty Daddy" out of the ring, and these two start scuffling on the outside. Deppen gets quite a few good licks in, but Dickinson manages to slam him into the turnpost before lifting him with a Military Press and sending him into the crowd back first into a row of chairs! The crowd is eating this up as Dickinson rolls back into the ring and kicks him feet up, laying across the top turnbuckle and daring Deppen to get back into the ring with him. Deppen gains his footing and gets back in there. Dickinson shoots on him and takes him down, and from there, Dickinson tries to out wrestle and out muscle Deppen, but Deppen is fast and his sense of danger seems to be leading him to be able to make escapes and counters, and after a few minutes, things get back to standing and the big blows start getting fired. One after the other, Deppen starts laying into Dickinson with open hand shots before running off the ropes and kneeing him straight to the face! Dickinson is clearly wobbled and backs up to the ropes. Deppen grabs Dickinson and tries for a T-Bone Suplex, but Dickinson busts out of it with elbows and then proceeds to use a Kamelin Lift before tossing Deppen with a Suplex half way across the ring! From there, Deppen picks himself up in the corner and "The Dirty Daddy" flies in with a hard Running Clothesline, followed by a T-Bone Suplex of his own! Dickinson tries for the cover, but Deppen kicks out! Dickinson begins laying into Deppen with Soccer Kicks, before lifting him and calling for the end. Dickinson seems to be looking for the Pazuzu Bomb, but Deppen reverses and rolls him up with a Sunset Flip, and it's in deep! ONE, TWO, THRE-NO! Dickinson kicks out! Deppen hurries off the ropes and goes looking for another Kneestrike maybe, but Dickinson is back up and flips him inside out with a LARIAT! Dickinson deadlifts Deppen from here with a Bridging German Suplex and the referee counts, but Deppen still kicks out! Dickinson can't believe it. Dickinson picks up Deppen and slaps him across the face before hooking him into a Front Facelock and trying to lift him maybe for a Falcon's Arrow, but Deppen catches him with a knee to break it up, followed by a Springboard Crossbody off the middle rope, but Dickinson is only held down for a two count! Deppen catches him with a Dropkick that sends him out of the ring! From there, Deppen heads up top and measures him up... FRONT FLIP PLANCHA, AND THESE FANS ARE GOING NUTS! Deppen sends Dickinson back into the ring and proceeds to try to hit a SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT, but NO! Dickinson gets the knees up! Dickinson is up now and delivers a CORKSCREW ROUNDHOUSE KICK that nearly decaps Deppen! Dickinson pulls Deppen up by the arm and steps over it, lifting Deppen and delivering his SICK BRAIN EATER FINISHER! Deppen was dropped right on the back of his head and neck, and it's all over! Dickinson mounts his chest, pelvis to Deppen's pecs as he sticks out his tongue and the referee counts to three.
Dickinson is one sick individual, but Deppen probably earned himself some fans tonight here in defeat.