Post by MadStepDad on Dec 14, 2011 13:54:24 GMT -5
"What Dreams are Made Of" by Pusha T
(Check out the AWESOME RIC FLAIR INTRO & OUTRO!!!)
** PYRO!!! **
Cut to the ringside announce team for the evening:
Gordon Solie & Matt Striker
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Curly Moe is dressed up like Santa and does a silly Santa mixed with Curly from the 3 Stooges intro. He's here tonight on the eve of the greatest, bestest, most fun holiday ever to track the arrival of Santa Claus!!! SANTA!!! SANTA!!! I KNOW HIM!!! Through the night Santa Curly Moe will be giving updates as Santa begins his tour of the country! Just then, an unseen hands darts into the scene to SLAP the Christmas hat askew on Curly Moe's head! Why, it's SHANE DOUGLAS and his cocky, smirking Triple Threat cohorts! Douglas disses Curly Moe - tells the world "Santa ain't real" - before threatening to head to the ring for a big call-out RIGHT NOW!!! They storm out... but the sexy Triple Threat valet SUNNY lingers on the set. She begins to console Curly Moe before letting a piece of mistletoe dangle over herself seductively. But when Curly Moe happily goes in for the blind kiss... Sunny SLAPS him and threatens him with a sexual harassment lawsuit! Curly Moe is left confounded and befuddled...
** CUT TO RING **
______________________________________________________________________________
SHANE DOUGLAS (1996) w/ Triple Threat vs SAMOA JOE (2006)
versus
The theme song for Triple Threat is the first thing we hear, and the group gets their grand PPV entrance. Sunny looks glorious, while the rest remain pissed off as usual. Shane Douglas has the mic for another inflammatory shoot. He addresses the critics, rumors and theories that Triple Threat can't hack it in XPW Remixed. Of course they assume NO responsibility for their shortcomings, it's ALL somebody's else fault. But now they aim to do something about it, and it all starts with SAMOA JOE. He's stormed into XPW Remixed with nobody asking him to, ran roughshod over the competition building up an undefeated streak, and disrespecting the Triple Threat!!! So right here right now, Samoa Joe gets his first test - because SHANE DOUGLAS IS CALLING HIM OUT! No sneak attacks, no surprises, this is one-on-one combat!!! Sure enough Joe's ominous theme song answers the challenge, and he emerges! By the time he's in the ring across from Douglas, the rest of the Triple Threat is at ringside and the ref is in place. Then the crowd chants start... "Joe's gonna KIIILLL you..." Match is a solid opener, with Samoa Joe actually in danger during a few spots. This is primetime "Franchise" Shane Douglas and he reminds the world why he was an Original ECW and XPW champion before. But... and nobody has really wanted to dwell on this yet... is the Triple Threat actually a HINDRANCE? It appears that way as Gilbert, Candido & Sunny cause a ruckus and are a constant distraction. Shane has things in hand, but loses control when a mistimed Sunny-interference draws the refs attention - and Gilbert cracks Douglas in the face with a roll of quarters by mistake!!! Muscle Buster/Rear naked choke in quick succession and Joe gets the tap!!!
Winner: SAMOA JOE
___________________________________________________________________________
XPW Remixed Tag Team Championship
BLKOUT © (w/ Annie Social)
versus GENERATION ME
versus (REAL) KINGs of WRESTLING (w/ Jessica Darlin)
(Tables, Ladders & Chairs match)
versus versus
BLKOut - Ruckus, Robbie Mireno & Sabian
A video recap sums up each team and their intersecting title aspirations. GenME enter first (boos), Real KoW w/ Darlin second (HUGE boos) and finally the fan favorite BLKOut with their Woman's champion valet Annie Social (big time cheers). They are right in the middle of their big, elongated ring introduction - when Real KoW's say "F*** THAT" and attack! We're off! All three teams go at it with the Tag belts dangling overhead. Exciting match with BLKOut and GenME providing the aerial fireworks, while Shatter & Idol bring the muscle. Darlin & Social exhibit the sexual tension outside the ring that helps keep the male contingent of the audience involved. In the end, after a series of convoluted ladder and table spots that finds Sabian & Matt Jackson dangling from the belts over the ring, Jessica Darlin tries to interfere by climbing up the ladder. This draws Annie Social into the ring and we've got a CATFIGHT!!! Idol & Shatter make the comeback though, and after a con-chair-toe at the top of the ladder to Sabian (in which his unconscious body crashes through a table on the arena floor), Gunner is able to scale the ladder and grab the belts while Idol braces him and keeps the ring clear!!! We have new champions!!!
Winners (and NEW XPW Tag Team champions): THE (REAL) KINGS of WRESTLING!!!
Jessica Darlin s*** championship d*** tonight!!!
** CUT **
********************
"CURLY MOE's SANTA TRACKER ALERT"
Santa has begun his descent along the West Coast. Curly Moe is in serious-silly reporter mode, when the still wet with sweat and dripping with championship gold duo of AUSTIN IDOL & PHIL "GUNNER" SHATTER burst into the scene! They're in full blown celebration mode as Jessica Darlin parades around them. The new XPW Tag Team champions shove Curly Moe out of the way to cut a quick promo on their victory and promise to rule the XPW Tag team division.
** CUT TO VIDEO **
____________________________________________________________________
XPW Television Title
THE MESSIAH © versus OFFICER CABANA
versus
Slick XPW Remixed video package that highlights the Messiah/Officer Cabana feud like it’s a “Cops” or “The Wire” episode. Officer Cabana is the corrupt (borderline tongue-in-cheek, Will Ferrell-ish) officer harassing and abusing The Messiah, in order to strong-arm him into a TV title match. Messiah is portrayed as the XPW home-brewed fan favorite fighting against “The Man” and the System. A more hardcore, “Oz”-like version of the Stone Cold Steve Austin rebellion. Officer Cabana enters first with new sirens-blaring theme song and addresses the crowd with a pre-match promo. As a foreshadowing of things to come, uniformed police officers and riot squad members accompany Cabana to ringside. Huge boos, rain of trash and “FUCK THE POLICE” chants greet him. Messiah gets the big PPV-level entrance and blows the roof off the building. Match itself is pure entertainment. Messiah dazzles with his intensity and high-impact maneuvers, while the larger Colt Cabana engages the crowd and plays the bully role. Despite his “gimmickry” and pageantry, Colt Cabana is a very solid wrestler who more than holds his own against Messiah. But in the end, Messiah’s Divine mission propels him onto victory with a series of moves culminating in his “Godsmack” spinning firemans Stunner… but Officer Cabana kicks out!!! Barely, but the close-call is breathtaking and even stuns Messiah for a moment. Cabana flees to ringside, the Riot cops get lightly involved, Messiah winds up MACED IN THE EYES by one of the faceless guards before Cabana TASERS his testicles!!! Back in the ring Messiah makes the brief comeback attempt to keep the crowd engaged, but Cabana suprises him – and the world perhaps – with a Colt .45 for the finish!! (??)
Winner (and NEW XPW Television champion)… OFFICER CABANA!!!
The bastard barely has time to hold up his new belt, when Messiah begins stirring. So Officer Cabana has him arrested anyway!!! He summons the phalanx of uniformed officers who surge upon Messiah with violent intent. Messiah “attempts to resist”, thus is beaten savagely with billy clubs and night sticks! The crowd heat is intense as more “F*** THE POLICE” chants rock the building. Messiah is handcuffed and literally dragged away up the entrance ramp, struggling all the way! Officer Cabana just smirks in the ring, trash raining down upon him, while holding the TV title aloft. “MESSIAH FOUGHT THE LAW… AND THE LAW WON!!!”
** CUT **
_____________________________________________________________________________
"Best of the Best" Tournament FINALS
MASAHIKO KIMURA versus "SICK" NICK MONDO
versus
This is XPW Remixed. This is a timeline clash. A virtual mash-up of styles, genres and generations. The past, present and future colliding in a fiery explosion and hurtling toward the unknown. This is XXXTREEEMEEE!!! This is hardcore science. THIS IS XPW REMIXED and these are the “BEST of the BEST”!!! Another sick video highlight reel of “Best of the Best” qualifying matches (see XPW Online #8 and XPW TV Episode #32) all set to “The Martyr” by Immortal Technique.
Masahiko Kimura enters first (with Dan Severn as anonymous corner man) to a traditional Japanese warrior entrance, complete with wind music, white gi’s and Japanese & American flags. MMA intro with the pre-ring pat down. Finally, “Last Resort” by Papa Roach blasts through the moment of dramatic silence and punctures a hole in the space/time continuum. The ovation received by “Sick” Nick Mondo tonight could rival that of even Hulk Hogan. MMA-styled ring introductions, tale of the tape graphic on the screen, and Mondo/Kimura come together in the center of the ring for brief ref instructions. They tap fists and bow out of mutual respect, before being called back to their corners for the start of the match! FIGHT!
They are hesitant to commit at first, with an extended feeling-out process. Mondo throws inside leg kicks and jabs, while Kimura keeps him at bay and looks for the shoot. When he does catch a Mondo leg kick, Kimura lunges for the takedown and the two begin grappling. Awesome sequence of scrambles and roll-throughs on the canvas, with Striker & Solie emphasizing that Mondo does not want to get caught on the mat with Kimura. Mondo – while much leaner than Kimura – is also taller, and uses the reach to his advantage with a varied assortment of strikes. Soon enough caution is thrown to the wind and both men go balls-out with the crowd voraciously cheering every move. To the mat, over the ropes, to the arena floor they battle. “Sick” Nick Mondo uses his entire repertoire of aerial moves, providing a stark contrast to Kimura’s debilitating ground game. Suddenly, the 10-minute match warning is announced. Then the FIVE minute mark… these man are fast approaching the 30 minute time limit! With about 2:50 left, Kimura finally – and ultra dramatically – seeks, hunts and LOCKS in the Kimura armlock! Mondo rolls through, but Kimura holds the lock! “Sick” Nick Mondo will have his shoulder torn from its socket! But using superhuman power he resists, and rolls to the ropes for the break! Crowd pops with the escape, but Mondo isn’t out of the water yet.
With the clock ticking down, Kimura targets the arm… goes for another Kimura armlock… but this time, Mondo dramatically reverses the holds momentum and twists Kimura over his shoulders into cross-armed torture rack position!!! LIFE CUTTER finisher from “Sick” Nick Mondo!!! 1!... 2!... 3!!!! Mondo scores the clean pinfall with moments to spare!!! Kimura kicked out at the 3.2 mark but it’s too late!!! “Sick” Nick Mondo is the BEST of the BEST!!!! Huge cheers, both men are exhausted, Mondo drops to his knees with tears in his eyes. Balloons and ticker tape rains down from the rafters, while fans begin tossing rolls of streamers across the ring covering it with spectacle and celebration. Kimura approaches Mondo first to give his blessing and congratulate him, where both men hug. Dan Severn shakes his hand. “Sick” Nick Mondo is left in the ring to soak up the adulation and appreciation for a career that lacks defining. He even poses with a young fan at ringside dressed up like his hero.
Winner: “SICK” NICK MONDO
** CUT **
_____________________________________________________________________________
O'MAHONEY 2.0 versus SHEAMUS
(Battle for Irish Pride)
versus
”SLOBBERKNOCKER” – A fierce and violent fight amongst two people, or a number of participants that eventually turns into a full-fledged donnybrook.
The phrase is common within pro wrestling circles (thank you good ‘ol JR!) but never is it more appropriate than for this match right here. The air is electric, and you can cut the tension with a knife. Here’s a taste of this particular matches appeal (especially in Boston) from a national and historical level:
It should be said that it was reported in the BOSTON GLOBE, on non-sports pages, that the streets surrounding Braves Field were tied up in a traffic jam until 2:30 in the morning, and it took 100 police to untangle them. Many people who drove to the match couldn’t get near the stadium, and when the time of the main event [10:00 p.m.] came near, they just abandoned their cars in the middle of the road. This, and the fact that the Boston press was smart, makes me believe the Boston attendance figures. Everything about the O’Mahoney push was revealed in the Boston papers.
In later interviews, O’Mahoney claimed he was loved by fans as an underdog and contender, but once he became champion, he was booed. He blamed it on the fans love for the underdog, and I believe it was the beginning on the unraveling of the Danno O’Mahoney gimmick. Sheamus was not just another wrestler in Boston. He had been pushed by Lewis & Mondt as a babyface (hero). Cheating the old hero to create a new baby face champion wasn’t an ideal way to gain support for O’Mahoney. Later pictures of Danno laughing back stage with Sheamus didn’t seem like a sportsman like gesture, even to the Irish. I don’t know if the plan was to turn O’Mahoney heel, but he sure did it. It seems strange after building up Danno as a good, old Irish boy. Maybe fans were turning on his babyface out of resentment, and he turned him heel to save face, or make it seem like he was in control. It was a similar situation to WCW turning Hulk Hogan heel after their fans tired of being sold vitamins.
** STEVE YOHE (explaining the O'Mahoney 2.0 gimmick and "Boston Phantom" run)
And so O’Mahoney 2.0 (aka “The Boston Phantom”) was created in XPW Remixed. This rough-and-tumble match between the two large Irish warriors turned out to be a sleeper hit of the night. Stiff brawling punctuated by hard-hitting slams and clubbing blows. Tests of strength (Sheamus won), skin-welting shots and dueling crowd chants were prevalent. O’Mahoney 2.0 nearly cracked Sheamus’ back with an Irish whip (a move Danno O’Mahoney actually invented) into an unprotected turnbuckle for the closest fall of the match. But in the end, after a series of running counters and reversals, Sheamus nearly takes O’Mahoney’s head off with a vicious Brogue kick!!! The crowd counts along with the pinfall and explodes at its conclusion! Sheamus has pinned O’Mahoney 2.0!!! Post match, Sheamus celebrates while a dejected O’Mahoney contemplates a heelish ambush… but instead the two Warriors exchange hard glares before Sheamus extends the handshake of mutual respect… and O’Mahoney 2.0 accepts!!!
Winner: SHEAMUS
** CUT **
*********************
"CURLY MOE's SANTA TRACKER ALERT"
Santa is making his way over the Midwest and is fast approaching! Time for Christmas carols! But who should interrupt but "the world's greatest entertainer" HONKY TONK MAN! With a new catalog of Christmas jingles for you. But his crooning leads to Tony Rumble and his crew muscling him out of the picture (with the masked Angel being especially terrifying to Honky Tonk Man). Scene somehow ends with XPW Woman's Division president Lizzy Borden sitting on Curly Moe's lap and making out with Sammi Lane while the "woo woo woo's!" and "nyucks nyuck nyucks" abound!!
** CUT TO RING **
_______________________________________________________________________
EZEKIEL JACKSON versus "BLUEPRINT" MATT MORGAN
versus
The bell rings and both men stare each other down before circling. They both soak in the reactions of the crowd before locking up. Morgan backs Big Zeke up but Jackson turns it around in the corner, and Morgan backs him right back out before breaking. We get another lock up and Jackson is sent into the ropes where he hits a shoulderblock but Morgan doesn't budge. Jackson calls for a test of strength. Both men struggle to establish dominance, but neither man gets the advantage before they break. Jackson hits Morgan with a couple of big clubbing blows before using a muay thai clinch and hitting a series of knees. Morgan gets out of it, smiles, and hits a discus clothesline. Morgan tries for the carbon footprint but Jackson avoids it and hits a clothesline, mounting Morgan and punching away. Morgan backs Jackson into the corner and hits a series of shoulders to his midsection before clotheslining him over the top to the outside.
Morgan follows to the outside, but Jackson fights back, slamming Morgan's head into the steps and sending him into the barricade. Jackson rearranges the ring steps. Jackson tries to send Morgan into the steps but Morgan avoids it and Jackson crashes into the steps. Morgan sends Jackson into the ring and clotheslines him in the corner before hitting a side slam for a two count. Morgan sends Jackson into the ropes and hits a back elbow before mounting him and hitting a series of right hands. Morgan picks Jackson up and hits a head butt before hitting the rapid fire elbow in the corner. Jackson shakes it off and follows Morgan out, saying something I can't re-print here. Jackson hits a series of clothesline before hitting an exploder suplex for a near fall of his own.
Morgan buries his shoulder in Jackson's gut in the corner again, but Big Zeke comes right back, taking Morgan down to the mat and locking in a modified half nelson. Morgan fights out of it, and avoids a charging Jackson. Morgan hits the chokeslam and goes for a pin, but Jackson kicks out at two. Morgan psychs himself up in the corner and he tries for the carbon footprint, but Jackson avoids it and hits the spear. Jackson goes for the pin but he's still only able to get a two count. Jackson picks Morgan up and hits the ropes but he walks right into a big carbon footprint. Jackson falls to the outside. Morgan is quick to follow and he sends Jackson back into the ring, going for the pin, but Jackson kicks out at two. Morgan catches Jackson in the corner with a boot, but Jackson comes up with a sit out chokebomb out of nowhere. Jackson goes for the pin but he still can't get three. So he sets up a wooden table in the corner, leveraging it against the turnbuckle. Both men make their way to their feet. We get another stare down as both men walk toward each other. Jackson asks for Morgan's best shot, and he takes it. Jackson reciprocates and Morgan takes it. Jackson hits Morgan again, then Morgan hits Jackson. Both men continue to go punch for punch, pushing the ref away and refusing to be broken up. A wild, errant Carbon Footprint from Morgan takes out the ref!
With the referee down, ALEX RILEY & MISSY HYATT make the run-in for interference, but Jackson fights them off (press slamming Riley right over the top rope to the floor). But suddenly, he's blindsided by a Carbon Footprint from Morgan that drives Jackson through the wooden table in the corner! Before you know it, "Nature Boy" Buddy Rogers is seen at the top of the entrance ramp hustling in another referee! Missy Hyatt holds Jackson's ankle down from outside the ring for good measure as Morgan steals the pinfall!!!
Winner: MATT MORGAN
After the match, Morgan and Jackson look at each other and then continue to fight. Security is out from the back to break both men up. Big Zeke attacks, taking Morgan down to the mat and both men roll to the outside. They continue to fight until they're broken up by security again. Security backs Jackson up the ramp and keeps Morgan at a distance. But BUDDY ROGERS suddenly appears to blindside Jackson with the XPW Championship belt! Now it's a 3-on-1 beatdown at the top of the ramp, that climaxes with Matt Morgan driving Jackson THROUGH THE WALL OF THE ENTRANCE RAMP! Jackson is crushed and left amidst the debris, while Morgan, Riley, Hyatt & Buddy Rogers pose triumphantly!!!
** CUT **
________________________________________________________________________________
Boston Championship
WILLIAM MULDOON © versus GREAT KHALI (w/ Jinder Mahal)
versus
William Muldoon continues his tour-de-force of a Boston championship reign with another impressive victory tonight. Yahoo sports KEVIN IOLE for the recap...
"Massive Great Khali, who is 7 feet, 8 inches and around 500 pounds, earned two quick submission attempts (vice grip) against the highly regarded Boston Champion.
Muldoon used a series of leg kicks to chop the much bigger man down. After a number of hard kicks, Great Khali has difficulty standing and ultimately collapses to the canvas. Muldoon hops on him and finishes it off fairly quickly with a ground-and-pound attack and Anaconda Vice, winning the match and keeping the Boston title."
Winner (and STILL Boston Champion): WILLIAM MULDOON
Muldoon holds his cherished Boston championship aloft. But all is not well within the Spartacan community of Olympia. Post match, an irate Jinder Mahal rises into the ring with a microphone to address Muldoon, who turns to face his antagonist head-on. But without warning, William Muldoon is BLINDSIDED by the prehistoric and savage GREAT GAMA, who clubs him from the rear with his giant Gurz!!! (Indo-Pakistani championship, that's shaped like a scepter). Muldoon is down in a heap upon the mat, and now Great Gama and Khali are stomping him! Tommaso Ciampa & Alexxis Nevaeh (faithful Olympia trainees) make the run-in but are quickly overwhelmed! The black-hooded Raisha Saeed takes down Alexxis while the squat, brutish Gama crushes Ciampa with a full-nelson. Meanwhile William Muldoon is locked, near-unconscious, in Khali's vice grip submission. Jinder Mahal continues to take it all in, standing with a smirk and a mic in one hand, black briefcase in the other. Finally the OLYMPIA tag team of Mil Mascaras and Hakushi make the run-in! But now Jinder Mahal gets involved, and they TOO are taken out of the equation in vicious fashion!!! Jinder Mahal (still in his American business suit and everything) locks Mil Mascaras in a vicious arm breaker (like Alberto Del Rio circa 2011)!!! Before long the carcasses are cleared from the ring, and only Muldoon's unconscious, twitching body remains at the feet of the Evil Empire. Then Jinder Mahal speaks.
** Boston Championship **
WILLIAM MULDOON © versus JINDER MAHAL
versus
Half English/half whatever language, but he's invoking strong emotion from the crowd and brandishing his briefcase over his head. Inside is apparently a guaranteed Boston title shot, of which he's taking advantage of RIGHT NOW! "The Real Deal" Damien Steele - the current XPW Remixed Commissioner - makes his PPV entrance to consort with Mahal and confirm for the audience that the contract IS indeed valid and that Mahal is awarded a title shot RIGHT NOW!!! By the time the Evil Empire has cleared the ring, and Mahal has stripped down to his wrestling gear - all he has to do is lock in his fight-ending arm breaker before the referee reluctantly calls the match, lest Muldoon's arm be permanently broken!!! We have a new Boston champion!! Mahal celebrates mid-ring with his Evil Empire behind him, like his destiny has just been reached. An eerie, overwhelming, intoxicating rush of power washes over all of them.
Winner (and NEW Boston Champion): JINDER MAHAL
_________________________________________________________________________
** BREAKING NEWS **
"Orville Brown crippled in car accident"
Former Midwest Wrestling Champion ORVILLE BROWN
After joining the Territory Wars at the beckon call of XPW Remixed, Orville had been maintaining a heavy schedule. He had set up a training camp in the LA area, and kept his streak and title intact when he won his opening bout in the "Sammartino Invitational". The subsequent hit-and-run attack by Eddie Gilbert upon Orville Brown injured the champion. He could take no matches for a month. Some top hands had agreed to work out with Orville and after a match in Des Moines he asked Bobby Bruns to ride back to Kansas City with him and to consider working with him some in preparation for the match with Thesz. After avenging himself upon the Triple Threat, Orville Brown was already anticipating putting Lou Thesz over as his successor.
Then disaster struck. They came over the top of a hill to find a semi-trailer truck crosswise in the road. The car struck the trailer and lodged under it. The two powerful men pushed back on the seat which broke. This, fortunately, kept them from being decapitated. Orville's head hit the main frame of the truck - and in addition to cuts, bruises and lacerations - he suffered critical and severe brain damage. Orville was unconscious and the doctors were not able to determine if he would survive. He regained consciousness after five days. His car, a near new Cadillac, was sold for salvage for $218.00.
** AN ORVILLE BROWN TRIBUTE VIDEO AIRS IN-ARENA **
Midwest Championship
ADAM PEARCE © (w/ Ad Santel) versus LOU THESZ
versus
The fantasy, the history, the spectacle, the intoxication. Pure magic. That's what these two artists bring to the squared circle tonight. Dusted by the ringside appearance of Cali Cripplers head coach Ad Santel (arm still in sling & cast), this match has all the makings of a dazzling affair. Pro wrestling history comes full circle here as the very first XPW Midwestern champion (aka "first ever NWA champion") Orville Brown - stricken down before he could pass his baton down the line - is fuel for this matches fire. Fans chant his name like "EDDIE", and Lou Thesz has dedicated this match to his spirit. All the way down the timeline of champions to the present day, and the last & most recent man to hold the NWA championship (aka "XPW Midwestern championship): ADAM PEARCE.
He's literally carried the mantle of this long-cherished institution when nobody else could. From booker to performer to pure "Scrap Iron", Adam Pearce gets it done. His recent "wrestling is everything" run through the XPW Heavyweight division has earned him that spot. Yet the San Francisco native and Cali Cripplers star has earned the derision of purists for the way he took Brown's title - out of the ring, on a legal technicality (Orville Brown was stripped by Commissioner Steele for injury). This tactical heel chess move has only added more heat to his in-ring character, especially with the news Orville Brown has been permanently crippled.
Match itself is a purists dream. If you study work rate, tactical aggression and ring psychology, your mind is blown by these two timeline counterparts. Lithe and strong, Lou Thesz is like a great panther - always in motion, always on attack. His hurling flat dropkicks level Pearce, whether on his feet or on his knees. But "Scrap Iron" Adam Pearce hangs tough, with his God-given wrestling talents being wonderfully accentuated by the fantasy training of Ad Santel. On commentary Solie & Striker remind you that the Cripplers are well versed on all of Thesz' weaknesses (due to Santel once training him and B-Boy betraying him). Adam Pearce uses the ropes alot to keep Thesz off him, and plenty of ill, amateur wrestling-inspired exchanges ensue. But in the end, the energy of the moment (compounded by the heart-pumping chants of "OR-VILLE! OR-VILLE!" that punctuate the match) shrinks Adam Pearce while simultaneously propelling Thesz to another wrestling orbit. In the matches dramatic conclusion, Thesz counters into a Chaos Theory rolling German (like Orville Brown used in XPW Remixed) - but instead of bridging into a pin, maneuvers into STF position and clinches Pearce in his debilitating submission finisher!!! Pearce has no choice but to tap out!!! Fans explode with the final toll of the bell. Another angel gets his wings.
Winner (and NEW Midwestern Champion): LOU THESZ
*******************
"CURLY MOE's SANTA TRACKER ALERT"
Clips end with Curly Moe joyfully exclaiming "SANTA's HERE" only to be dismayed when a typical dept store Santa walks in and "ho ho ho's" it up. In a scene reminiscent of Will Ferrell's "Elf", Curly Moe disputes the fake Santa's claims and interrupts him when he's about to have a young child sit on his lap. Leads to another slapstick fracas with the fake Santa so irate at Curly Moe that they tumble, tangle and destroy the Christmas set while the comedic sound effects and "woo woo woo's" continue!! Merry Xmas from XPW Remixed!!!
** CUT TO RING **
________________________________________________________________________
XPW Remixed Championship (East Coast)
BRUNO SAMMARTINO © versus NICK FN GAGE
(Street Fight)
versus
Scott: A very fun and highly entertaining match as both men give and take some big moves all over the arena. I like this match for a couple of reasons. First, Gage didn’t have to do a ludicrous ninety foot elbow drop or crash through a million light tubes to make a mark. Gage did a great job just going with the flow and getting Bruno so infuriated that he couldn’t just beat the crap out of him that it made for great drama as the match progressed. Bruno, who rarely gets busted open, was cut early and the frustrated look on his face with the blood trickling down was a great shot. Gage did do a cool spot where he was standing on the barricade behind the announce table, and then planchas over Solie and Striker right onto Sammartino. He also does a frog splash right onto a garbage can. So he does do some crazy spots, but nothing like he did against Ian Rotten two months earlier (see "RETRIBUTION"). The other reason I really like this match is that Bruno had already wrestled against Gage (see "RAPTURE"), and didn’t take this match off. He went all out to make this a bloody, legit street fight. Obviously the most memorable spots are the ones near the back set where Gage went through the two glass walls. The first one Bruno can’t suplex him through and Gage smacks his head on the cement. The second time it works, then he tries twice to suplex him through the other glass pane, and eventually Bruno just throws him through it. Then there’s the finale, where Bruno lays a board over the corner and he powerbombs Gage off it for the three count. A great night for both men, and an A+ effort for Bruno, who matched Gage in one night and coming out even better than before. Grade: 4
Justin: Despite having wrestled already, Bruno came out of the gate aggressively here as he was looking to quickly destroy Gage to end the night on a good note. He would dominate Gage early with wrestling, especially wearing him out with suplexes, but Gage would get back into the match by brawling. Bruno was resilient, but Gage started wearing him out with weapons and basic submission holds. The missed frog splash by Gage was a sick spot as he just crushes the trash can with full force from the top. Of course, that wasn’t nearly as sick as the glass ridden battle in the aisle. The image of an exhausted Sammartino just tossing Gage time after time into the glass wall, trying to break it, is a scary one and bumps this match up from being pretty good to being legendary. The shots of Gage being covered in blood and glass shards were nasty and I think the match should have just ended right there in the aisle as the finish ended up being anticlimactic and feeling a bit tacked on. Bruno would wheel Gage to the ring on a utility cart, where he would end up making a brief comeback before Bruno would finally put him down with the tope rope powerbomb. The match was really stiff and nasty but just a bit too long and I think it could have been a lot better if it was tighter in the beginning and if they lopped off the end. Still, it was a great outing and Sammartino comes out looking like Superman and capping it off with a sick brawl. Grade: 4
Winner (and STILL XPW Remixed champion): BRUNO SAMMARTINO
** CUT **
____________________________________________________________________________
XPW Remixed Championship (West Coast)
"NATURE BOY" BUDDY ROGERS © (1961)
versus
THE MIZ (2011)
versus
Epic-level main event entrances for both men, starting with Miz - and ending with "Nature Boy" Buddy Rogers (escorted by a dozen beautiful women + a beaming Alex Riley & Missy Hyatt). After MMA-inspired main event introductions, the bell rings and we’re ready to begin. The crowd is chanting "MIZ IS AWESOME". Both men lock up and Rogers takes Miz down to the mat and slaps at the back of his head before bailing to the outside to avoid Miz’s ire. Rogers heads back into the ring and we get another lock up. Both men try for hammerlocks before Miz takes the Nature Boy down to the mat with an arm bar. Rogers fights off Miz and beats and stomps on him in the corner.
Miz avoids a charging Rogers in the corner but eats a dropkick anyway. Rogers takes Miz over with a side head lock and the crowd is still chanting about Miz. Miz breaks the hold but falls to a shoulder block. Miz is back on his feet and he tries for a hip toss but Rogers rolls through. Miz grabs his legs, slingshots him into the corner and sends him over the top rope. Miz follows to the outside and brawls with former apprentice Alex Riley before sending Rogers back into the ring.
Miz argues with Missy Hyatt on the outside before getting back into the ring and the distraction allows Rogers to hit a neck breaker for a near fall. Rogers hits a beautiful high elbow drop. He gloats to the crowd before taking Miz over with a fireman’s carry for another near fall. Rogers tries to wear Miz down with a rear chin lock.
Miz is able to fight up to his feet and out of the hold before being slammed back down to the mat by his hair. Rogers kicks at Miz, taunting and slapping him as well. Rogers chokes Miz with his boot while pulling on his hair. Rogers slaps Miz across the face, and this enrages Miz, leading to him putting Buddy in the corner and pounding away. The ref breaks things up and this allows Rogers to hit an awesome suplex for another near fall.
Rogers goes for the Figure-4 leglock but Miz tosses him off. Miz hits a couple of clotheslines, a big kick to the jaw, and a neckbreaker for a near fall of his own. Rogers kicks at Miz’s shins before going for a roll up with the tights. Miz kicks out and he’s able to connects with a running turnbuckle clothesline to the side of Rogers’ head for another two count. Miz goes for a neckbreaker but he’s pushed off. Rogers goes for a head scissors, but floats around into a Figure-4 leglock!!! Miz reverses into a Figure-4 of his own, and when Rogers fights it off Miz hits a huge DDT, but Missy Hyatt gets Rogers foot on the ropes to break the count. The ref sees it, so he sends Missy & Alex to the back.
Missy and Alex are furious, screaming the whole way to the back. Miz picks Rogers up and tries for a suplex but it’s blocked by the "Nature Boy", countered into a roll up for two. Miz goes for a kick to the face but Rogers moves and both men trade roll ups. Rogers connects with the rocker dropper and goes for a pin but he still can’t get three.
Rogers goes for the sleeper again but he’s shrugged off. Miz hits a big knee to the side of Rogers’s head. Miz goes for the Skull-Crushing finale, but Rogers counters - mule kick low blow - small package (with a handful of tights) for the pin!!! Rogers retains! Miz is irate and disappointed (mostly with himself), while blue & white confetti falls from the ceiling - showering the Nature Boy with glory. The announcers wonder if anyone will ever be able to topple the mighty Diamond Dynasty monopoly.
Winner (and STILL XPW Champion): NATURE BOY BUDDY ROGERS
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CREDITS:
SCOTT & JUSTIN: King of the Ring 2001 review
STEVE YOHE: "A Study of Danno O'Mahoney"
KEVIN IOLE: UFC 7 review, yahoo sports