Post by MadStepDad on Aug 2, 2011 20:46:20 GMT -5
Cut to the in-studio announce team for the evening:
Gordon Solie & Matt Striker
Once again, chaos, insanity and upheaval has gripped XPW Remixed. In the wake of the seminal PPV classic "Liberty or Death", many questions were answered - while many new ones are asked. The most important question is WHO'S THE XPW REMIXED CHAMPION??? After the controversial finish to the main event Iron Man match, XPW President (current) Ed "Strangler" Lewis has prepared a public statement. Meanwhile, the mediation between former Gold Dust Trio Inc partners was unsuccessful, and now the proposed split of XPW Remixed will be heading to court. The Grand Wizard has promised a counter-statement tonight, where he will introduce his new business partner and plans for an East Coast expansion. All that plus another old wrestling concept gets an XPW Remixed twist, we've got NEW Tag Team champions, and the MIZ continues his "Rockstar Reality Show" tour with another Title Unification bout tonight! Oh my let's get right to the action!!!
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1) THE XPW REMIXED CHAMPIONSHIP CONTROVERSY
Ed "Strangler" Lewis at his Gold Dust Trio Inc training center in Wisconsin
Video opens from the grounds of Strangler Lewis’ training facility, where Gold Dust Trio Inc fighters prepare for battle. Strangler Lewis can be seen hitting the mats on occasion – here you see him tangling with head trainer at GDT Inc, Ad Santel. Listen to the Strangler’s words. He is amongst the purest embodiment of this great sport, and the rifts in his company have gravely and deeply insulted him. The legal shenanigans of former partner The Grand Wizard, his other partner Toots Mondt’s failed promotional attempts to take Primo Carnera national, and now – XPW Remixed champion “Nature Boy” Buddy Rogers’ latest antics at the conclusion to “Liberty or Death”. All have forced a quick and succinct statement from the (still) President of XPW Remixed, addressing the pressing issues.
** The XPW Remixed championship is considered VACANT.
** Bruno Sammartino is OFFICIALLY recognized as "Interim World Champion", until the world title situation can be rectified.
** "Nature Boy" Buddy Rogers has exactly 30 days to answer the championship rematch clause (deadline is the next big XPW Remixed show "Damage Inc") or forfeit all claims to the title AND be fined $250k.
** After the buyout of The Grand Wizard failed, they are taking the matter to court. Strangler is certain the judge will shut down any attempts to split the company.
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BLKOut (w/ Annie Social) versus JTG & CHRIS CA$H (XPW Remixed debut!!!)
versus
BLKOut made their triumphant in-ring debut at "Liberty or Death" with a little help from their friends and fans (video recap of Annie Social smacking the shit out of JTG and an unseen "fan" ripping the NY Yankees pendant off JTG's chest). Here tonight, the feud continues at the behest of JTG - who is WITHOUT his usual partner Shad Gaspard (the result of a lingering knee injury). So instead, we get the XPW Remixed debut of a new talent. Emerging through the curtain riding a sick Sport Bike (looking like he just rode off the set of "Fast and Furious") is the exciting, young prospect CHRIS CA$H!!! He revvs the bike engine, performs a couple wheelies for a crowd pop and makes his way into the ring to cheers! Chris Ca$h is clearly taller than the rest, and much leaner. He wears a white doo-rag over his head and a small gold chain around his neck. Tight black Rock-n-Roll jeans (with white rag hanging out the pocket ala Jeff Hardy circa 2005ish) complete the ensemble. Solie & Striker inform you he is a young man with alot of potential. BLKOut themselves perform their usual stall tactics to start the match - badgering and harassing audience members and ring officials on the mic, using profanity, flaunting Annie Social, etc. Match is a quick, high-paced, frenetic affair with all 4 wrestlers getting their due. They all hit their trademark spots, including a sick move from Chris Ca$h where he starts back to back with his opponent before launching him over his head for a sitout facebuster (called the "Ca$h Flow" by Matt Striker on commentary). But in the end, BLKOut keep it gangsta and win the match by pinning Ca$h (after JTG botched the tag and Chris Ca$h was blindsided by a dragon suplex onto a chair). Post match JTG screams on Ca$h like his dad for the loss, while Annie Social helps lead the crowd in "FREE NICK GAGE" chants.
Winners: BLKOut
** CUT **
** Backstage, MSD and camera crew are sneaking up on a developing story. From behind half-open XPW Commissioners Office doors, Damien Steele and Eddie Gilbert can be seen in a red-faced argument with each other. They're obviously yelling about their match at "Liberty or Death" (Steele clonked Gilbert with a steel chair, by mistake?) and about Eddie Gilbert's assignment later tonight. But before we can overhear any more information, Steele sees the cameras lurking and SLAMS the office door shut! Muffled shouting can still be heard from within... **
** CUT **
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** Backstage, William Muldoon - head trainer of the Olympia fight camp - is conferring with one of his star pupils, Alexxis Nevaeh. He is still clearly rattled after the traumatic abduction by Doink ReBourne and his men, but Alexxis Nevaeh insists she is fine. She cuts an impassioned promo about righting the wrongs and standing up for a woman's pride. Muldoon is still hesitant, and reluctantly ask Alexxis if she is "sure about tonight". Alexxis insists she is, and will be competing one-on-one with DANNY HAVOC later tonight!!! William Muldoon will corner her for her own safety, but as we saw at "Liberty or Death", Alexxis Nevaeh can certainly handle her own... **
** FADE **
The Southern Heavyweight Champion "Superstar" Bill Dundee puts his belt on the line tonight for an XPW TV title shot!!!
** FADE OUT **
THE SHOOTERS CLUB ANNOUNCEMENT
LOU THESZ: I had great coaching: Ed "Strangler" Lewis part of the time, and Ray Steele, George Tragos, the three-time Olympic winner. Good company. And I tried to learn my craft, and spent my entire life at it. I traveled all over the world for 50 years plus. Traveled 14, 15 million miles. Wrestled more than 6,000 times. Trained that many times. Wore out several pairs of shoes doing that, and myself at times. But it's been a great life. I enjoyed it very, very much. There's only one thing I'd love to say about it: I'd like to do it all over again. I discovered at a very early age–I was about 18 or 19–that I was making a pretty darned decent living doing something that I enjoyed doing. And if you enjoy going to work in the morning, you try to do a better job. The labor of love gets into it, and you do a job that maybe someone who's just getting paid to do something–who doesn't enjoy it–is not going to do. So you reach back, and you either give it that extra effort, or try to do the best you can.
XPW Remixed is the Wild Wild West of professional wrestling, and in the world of madmen and outlaws, it's best to keep a black hat by your side. Introducing to the Territory Wars (courtesy of the Shooters Club) - "The Psycho Shooter" DRAKE YOUNGER. The best of both worlds - extensive technical background mixed with the insanity of Japanese Death Matches (Drake Younger's "SAW Death Match" against Thumbtack Jack in particular is infamous for it's depravity). What better way to prove to the world that the Shooters Club is the best training camp in fantasy wrestling today than by unleashing the next wave of inter-generational grapplers?
"The Psycho Shooter" Drake Younger
LOU THESZ: That's where it is in the professional world. It's been great, and we had some great, great wrestlers in the past and present. And we had some people, of course, at the lower end of the totem pole, that really weren't that great, but they also supported the sport. Today we have drugs. At that time we had some alcoholics, but they weed themselves out automatically. The cream rises to the top, as they say. The good ones stay in there and keep going, or try to, and the ones who have not done their homework and hit the booze or whatever, they fall by the wayside. It's just a matter of choice, that's all.
Lou Thesz is officially challenging the winner of tonight's title unification bout to a championship match at "DAMAGE INC"!!! Whether it's "Superstar" Bill Dundee retaining his Southern Heavyweight Championship, and putting The Miz's
"Rockstar Reality TV Show Tour" out of business. Or it's The Miz continuing to put his money where his mouth is and merging Dundee's championship with his own cherished Television championship. Either way, "The Shooter" Lou Thesz wants the winner at "Damage Inc"! May the best man win. And everybody knows, the best men in fantasy wrestling come from the Shooters Club academy!
LOU THESZ: If you want to do a good job at something, you may succeed if you're lucky. Luck has a lot to do with it, because a major injury at the wrong time.... [It] happened to me, happened to many people. It just slows you up, and you've got to kind of start all over again. When you get into competitive wrestling, not just show business, there isn't any time or any day that you're not hurting somewhere. Unless you can work around that and live with it, and try to enjoy your life along with that discomfort, you're in the wrong business. So I always enjoyed it. You've gotta be a little goofy to do it, I guess, but that's part of the game. I met some wonderful people in wrestling, just unbelievable people. I got a great education, traveled the world, they paid me to do it, and I'd like to do it again.
Oh my, Lou Thesz has earned his title opportunity at "Damage Inc"! But who will be his opponent??? Find out in the main event later TONIGHT!!!
** CUT**
** Backstage in the La Coka Nostra locker room, we find all three members of the group fretting over something. Lil Guido and Tony Mamaluke bicker while Sal E. Graziano tries to keep the peace. Apparently - their big bosses The Sicilians have gone MISSING ever since their title loss at "Liberty or Death!" No answer on their cell phones, their hotel room was vacant and nobody knows where they are! That's extra bad news, because La Coka Nostra has a match tonight against the Cannibal Cartel! But with The Sicilians missing, they're going to come up short. Just then... none other than "ROCKSTAR" JOEY KAOS (along with the lovely Missy Hyatt) make their entrance! KAOS cuts a brief flamboyant promo saying that HE will step up and take La Coka Nostra's side against the Cannibal Cartel! Apparently, the "Rockstar" Joey KAOS has a point to prove to his girl Missy - and the Cannibal Cartel capo Vic Grimes. KAOS wants in, and La Coka Nostra reluctantly agree. KAOS teams up with La Coka Nostra against the Cannibal Cartel TONIGHT!!! **
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THE (REAL) KINGS of WRESTLING ARE IN XPW REMIXED
Enter a very disgruntled MadMan Pondo. He looks like the grungy, hardcore scrub that he is – with a stop sign under his arm and a mic in his hand. As usual, it takes a few moments before Pondo can speak because the vulgar chants and air horns continuously drown him out. He cuts a Southern-fried promo, dismissing Memphis TN as being home to nothing but redneck swine! (oh the irony) He disses Switchblade Conspiracy (who beat him at “Liberty or Death”) and he disses his old valet Jessica Darlin for being a “no-good [censored][censored][censored]” Madman Pondo is crazy (calling himself “Andre the Giant of Xtreme”) and once again challenges anybody in the house to a handicap match (the same kind of smack-talk that got him booked against Switchblade Conspiracy at the PPV)! His foul-mouthed rant is suddenly greeted by a dramatic dimming of the house lights, a new theme song, and a giant golden “Crown” on the video wall…
Introducing to XPW Remixed… The (Real) Kings of Wrestling!!!
AUSTIN IDOL (1981) & PHIL “GUNNER” SHATTER (2013)
(REAL) KINGS of WRESTLING versus MADMAN PONDO
(Handicap Match)
versus
Bursting with swagger and intensity, the REAL Kings of Wrestling make their triumphant debut right here in Memphis Ten-a-Ki!!!! “The Universal Heartthrob” Austin Idol drips with style and arrogance. The chiseled Phil Shatter earned his nickname “Gunner” after serving in the Iraq war, and with his dominating run through Immortal in TNA has cemented himself as a main event prospect for wrestling’s future. His persona crackles with focused determination. The REAL Kings of Wrestling take their time getting into the ring, before Austin Idol gets his own microphone for a quick retort to Madman Pondo. Austin Idol reacquaints himself with the local Memphis constituency (familiar with his work from his feud opposite Jerry Lawler) – introduces his tag team partner from the future – gloriously christens themselves the “REAL Kings of Wrestling!” – and takes it right to Madman Pondo’s ugly, scarred, surprised mug! Stylish elbow smash, knee drops and a piledriver from Austin Idol (a potentially LETHAL maneuver in Memphis). Sidewalk slam, spinebuster and finally an F5 finisher from Phil “Gunner” Shatter ends the match emphatically for the REAL Kings of Wrestling!!! Idol & Shatter are in XPW Remixed to prove to the fantasy wrestling world they are the “REAL Kings of Wrestling”!!!
Winners: AUSTIN IDOL & PHIL SHATTER (“The REAL Kings of Wrestling”)
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EDDIE GILBERT versus CURLY MOE
versus
Eddie Gilbert in the ring to start the segment. He gets on the mic and goes off on his opponent for the evening (and former tag team partner from "Liberty or Death") Curly Moe. He builds up massive heel heat, so when Curly Moe finally bursts through the curtain to defend his honor - the crowd pop is magnificent. Elongated comedy segments here that find Gilbert a constant victim of Curly Moe's 3-Stooges-inspired shenanigans. Eye pokes, face slaps and head bonks all serve to infuriate Gilbert until he can barely see straight. He briefly takes over with a low blow and eye rake of his own, but Curly Moe's psychology (on purpose or not, even Striker & Solie aren't sure) has completely frazzled the hot-tempered former "Hot Stuff". Gilbert's rage overwhelms him and winds up eating a huge 400 lb sit-down splash from Curly Moe for the pinfall! Shock! Curly Moe wins the match in a huge upset! The rotund funnyman is off to slap hands and laugh it up with the audience members, while Gilbert is left to rip his hair out in the ring and bug his eyes out in exaggerated forms of exasperation and anger!!!
Winner: CURLY MOE
** CUT **
** Backstage correspondent MSD wants to get a word with Buddy Rogers regarding The Strangler's earlier proclamations, but finds only Jack Swagger & Alex Riley in the Diamond Dynasty dressing room. Both are cocky, smarmy and arrogant - carrying themselves like members of the Billionaire Boys Club. They're like the kids from the movie "Boiler Room" - young, fast money and immune to the consequences. Swagger brags about "making it rain" at "Liberty or Death" and he and Riley relate how they went out after the show and shut down every strip club in LA. As for the Original "Nature Boy"? Best believe he was with them all night in the champagne room. And don't be surprised to see the "Nature Boy" on his own cross-country tour - settling the score and letting the Cristal pour... Everybody knows he's the "REAL" world champion. **
** CUT TO RINGSIDE **
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CANNIBAL CARTEL versus LA COKA NOSTRA... and "ROCKSTAR" JOEY KAOS ()
versus
Things are back to normal tonight in Memphis, as the entire Cannibal Cartel team is greeted with thunderous boos. La Coka Nostra doesn't get much love either on their entrance, but when KAOS and Hyatt finally part through the curtains the place erupts with cheers. Match mostly involves Rotten & Mondo, with the Headhunterz flexing a few titanic double team moves once and a while. Tony Mamaluke spends most of the match getting pummeled, while Lil Guido has a chance to show off some of his space-age submission attempts (twisting Mondo's body into a pretzel at points). "Rockstar" Joey Kaos is a blinding house a'fire, vaulting over the top rope and going to work on the Cartel with high-impact, high-flying moves. He even clears out all 4 men with a running somersault plancha that earns the first "XPW XPW XPW!!!" chants of the night! In the end, Graziano attempts interference - and winds up getting swallowed up in a brawl with the massive Headhunterz (moving these 3 men away from the ring). This leaves Guido and Mondo to go through a quick exchange of counters before Rotten simply clobbers Guido with a chair - but KAOS comes off the top rope for a KAOStrophe (top rope somersault neckbreaker, like Buff Bagwell's old Blockbuster move) for the pin! The XPW Tag Team champions Headhunterz rush the ring but it's too late! KAOS and Hyatt are smiling and celebrating on the outside! MSD catches up with them for a quick word in the aisle, and KAOS looks right into the camera while challenging "Vicious" Vic Grimes to a KotDM championship fight at "Damage Inc!" Oh my, the Rockstar in a Death Match! Will Missy Hyatt once again get her way, or is this a miscalculation of monumental proportions???
Winners: KAOS & LA COKA NOSTRA
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ALEXXIS NEVAEH (w/ William Muldoon) versus DANNY HAVOC
versus
Danny Havoc addresses his "arch nemesis" William Muldoon, and his opponent for the night... young Alexxis Nevaeh...
"Masters of Pain" in this case refers to the tag team of himself and Thumbtack Jack, under the tutelage of Doink ReBourne
The demented Danny Havoc just has a sick look in his eyes as he sizes up his opponent from across the ring. He's clearly thinking bad thoughts. But the perky, young Alexxis Nevaeh is unperturbed, and focuses on her skill and training. From the corner, William Muldoon coaches and shouts words of encouragement to his young pupil. This is an unsanctioned inter-gender match specifically requested by Alexxis Nevaeh herself! Revenge for her captivity at the hands of Cult ReBourne (see XPW TV Episode #18). Havoc starts by taking Alexxis lightly, but after a few surprising takedowns and counters (to great cheers from the appreciative audience), Havoc is forced to retool and take this match more seriously. He bullies Alexxis around the ring, and is unrelenting with his stiff strikes and slams. He disrespects Alexxis and infuriates Muldoon with his taunts and antics. But in the final dramatic reversal of fortune, Neveah counters a DVD attempt from Havoc into a Rear-Naked choke! She then segues into a tornado DDT for the upset pin!!! Havoc has been layed out, while Alexxis and Muldoon rejoice in their victory! Girl power!!!
Winner: ALEXXIS NEVAEH
** CUT **
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THE GRAND WIZARD PRESS CONFERENCE
The Grand Wizard pulled this press conference together in response to Strangler Lewis' comments from earlier. Accompanying TGW at the press conference is his Original Sheik and Abdullah the Butcher (both wearing turbans and thousand-dollar suits).
** Officially recognizes "Nature Boy" Buddy Rogers as the XPW Remixed champion!!
** His case for a company separation has grown only stronger in the wake of "Liberty or Death" (TGW is convinced his ex-partners had something to do with the surprise returns of Pogo the Clown & New Jack)
** The Grand Wizard has brought in his NEW partner, and with him promises to take over XPW Remixed by "Damage Inc" and relocate the company to the East Coast!!!
Introducing to Mash-Up Wrestling...
JACK PFEFER (and his bodyguard DICK SHIKAT!!!
Jack Pfefer pioneered an earlier form of sports entertainment, as he was one of the first promoters to visualize the pro wrestling business in the mold of theater. However, he developed an infamous reputation when he exposed the sport’s inner secrets to the mainstream press in a spiteful attack that nearly destroyed the entire industry. Now he's back - and alongside his bone-breaking enforcer Dick Shikat - has joined forces with The Grand Wizard to force a coup! XPW Remixed is at WAR and The Grand Wizard's side just mounted up!
** CUT **
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DAMAGE INC SLAUGHTAHOUSE QUALIFER
In late 2001, XPW Original released “Damage Inc” – a super show featuring KAOS, Vic Grimes, Pogo the Clown and New Jack amongst others. One of the bonus matches included was a hardcore battle royal, similar in execution to the old school “Bunkhouse Stampedes” of yesteryear (or “today” if you consider JCP anything more than just a recap of past WWE Classics on Demand episodes). Now – XPW Remixed is doing it again. In honor of the re-release of “Damage Inc”, XPW Remixed will be hosting a “Slaughtahouse Stampede” match. An Xtreme, weapons-filled, street fight battle royal where the only way to eliminate your opponents is to toss them over the top rope! This is ain’t your daddy’s wrestling, and it CERTAINLY ain’t no Tonga Kid, Doug Basham or muthaphuckkin Patriot!!! These are real, hardcore, do-or-die soldiers of the underground Xtreme circuit. All Ready to Die like Biggie Smalls. Tonight – the first example of an XPW Remixed “Slaughtahouse Stampede” begins with our first Qualifying Match. A 10-man “Slaughtahouse Stampede” style match, with the sole survivor or tag team going on to the big match at “Damage Inc”!!!
Down to the ring – live in Memphis TN – where the ring announcer has finished explaining the rules. Crowd is rabid for the first two entrants into the “Slaughtahouse Stampede” Qualifying match…
#1: B-Boy
#2: SABU!!!
… or not… B-Boy waits impatiently in the middle of the ring as Sabu’s music goes unanswered multiple times. Crowd is growing restless and starts booing. On commentary, Striker & Solie surmise this is yet another ploy by The Grand Wizard to get Sabu barred from competing under certain State Athletic Commissions (first California – see “Liberty or Death” - and now Tennessee)!
CUT THE MUSIC!!!
Enter a top-hat wearing, sequined superstar with platinum blond hair (slicked back into a pompadour). The hometown Memphis crowd EXPLODES when they recognize the brash man with the mic in his hand…
Introducing JACKIE FARGO!!! (1958)
“The Southern Legend” and Fabulous One himself is in the building! Since XPW Remixed decided to come down to Fargo Country (Memphis TN), the originator of the wild Southern brawl figured he would bring the fight right back to XPW Remixed! By showing the WORLD that hardcore originated in Memphis! Crowd pop is off the charts as Jackie Fargo starts wildly pitching steel chairs over his shoulder and overhead into the ring, narrowly missing B-Boy multiple times!!! Crowd starts chanting “XPW!” and MORE chairs start sailing over the barricades into the ring, tossed in by rowdy fans! Jackie Fargo slides into the chair-littered ring and the brawl is ON with B-Boy!!!
#4: Lil Chief
Out next is the former faceless jobber who showed up with the Cannibal Cartel at “Liberty or Death”. Here, he rocks the familiar black-n-white “Cannibal Cartel” logo on his torn-away T-shirt. Shades of those old “NWO” shirts that used to show up everywhere. This is the first time he’s ever mentioned by name – “Lil Chief” (as in “marijuana toker”). Huh. I guess his entry into the Cannibal Cartel is self-explanatory. Either way, just the black “CCz” T-shirt is enough to draw heat and the crowd boos lustily as Lil Chief goes right after Jackie Fargo with clubbing blows.
#5: Danno O’Mahoney (1935)
The buzzer sounds, and through the black curtains enters another new arrival to the XPW Remixed scene – the Boston Wrestling champion and ORIGINAL Irish wrestling superstar – DANNO O’MAHONEY!!! Inventor of the “Irish Whip”, Danno O’Mahoney is part of the same Boston-area talent exchange that brought us the Olympia and Curly Moe! The fair-skinned Irish lad makes his entrance clad in Notre Dame gear, smiling and slapping hands with the fans. He goes right to work, vaulting over the top rope with a dropkick to Lil Chief!
#6: NEW JACK!!!
AHHHHH shocking TV run-in by the Original Gangsta of pro wrestling himself!!! New Jack enters to arguably the loudest pop of the night, wearing a staple gun around his neck and pulling a trash barrel full of weapons behind him!!! With “Natural Born Killaz” blasting in the background, New Jack empties out the barrels contents and uses them full-force on his opponents! A crutch is broken over B-Boy’s back! A kendo stick shot turns Danno O’Mahoney’s pale skin red with welts! BAM! BAM! New Jack fires two staples into Lil Chief’s forehead, causing a river of crimson to burst forth! Crowd is going wild!
** LIL CHIEF is eliminated by NEW JACK after being stuffed into a trash can and whacked with a steel chair!!! **
Jackie Fargo and B-Boy collapse on New Jack, taking him down. The wild, weapons-filled brawl continues with each man clad in their street gear.
#7: Ryan Dangerfield
Another one-time faceless jobber, this young Australian talent finally gets his chance to shine. In real life, Ryan Dangerfield is an aspiring independent wrestler from Australia. Editors Note: He was also a message board poster from another fantasy draft game I played, and I drafted his character for kicks & giggles. I’ve used him as enhancement talent ever since, but tonight in Memphis TN he gets his big break. Literally. Almost as soon as he steps into the ring he gets a computer keyboard broken over his head courtesy of the violent criminal New Jack!
** RYAN DANGERFIELD is eliminated by JACKIE FARGO after a Roaring Elbow from the “Fabulous One” sends young Dangerfield spinning 360 degrees over the top rope! **
#8: Hardbody Harrison
Ooooweeee! Out next, is the pimptastic, colorful and bombastic Hardbody Harrison! Sculpted like a statue, he resembles a young Rocky Johnson meets “The Natural” Butch Reed with a touch of Zach Ryder flamboyance (Hardbody Harrison rocks the one pant leg-missing, purple tights style). He primps and preens for the audience (most notably the female members) before undergoing an elaborate pre-match spectacle in which he argues and threatens the lowly timekeeper to pay close attention to all the garish jewelry and necklaces Hardbody Harrison has to take off before climbing in the ring! Finally, Hardbody Harrison hops up on the ring apron – decides to pose for the booing audience once more – only to be suplexed inside the ring onto a steel chair by Jackie Fargo!!! Tough medicine for the jive-talking young boxer/wrestler!
#9: Giant Silva!!!
As the buzzer sounds to announce the next combatant – none other than the “Prince of Darkness” Kevin Sullivan arrives on the scene (wearing an eye patch)! The evil mastermind unleashes the gale forces of Hell and Purgatory to unleash his latest unholy abomination… THE GIANT SILVA!!! Emerging from the black curtains behind Sullivan, the nearly 8 feet tall 500 pound monster cuts an intimidating sight! Under Sullivan’s direction, the shambling beast makes his way to the ring and over the top rope with one giant step. Sloppy headbutts take down New Jack and Danno. Giant Silva is on a tear! Jackie Fargo wields a steel chair but Giant Silva simply punches right through it!
** HARDBODY HARRISON is eliminated after a GIANT SILVA tomahawk chop **
** B-BOY is eliminated by GIANT SILVA after being caught in mid-air and pitched over the top rope with a gorilla-press slam!! **
The Slaughtahouse Stampede qualifying brawl continues with the remaining wrestlers striking, smashing and bludgeoning each other. Danno O’Mahoney dropkicks Fargo! New Jack smashes a kendo stick over Giant Silva’s back – who simply no-sells it and chokes out New Jack!!! Now Danno O’Mahoney is going after Giant Silva’s knees but it’s to no avail! One big boot plants O’Mahoney into the mat like an Irish flag! Giant Silva is cleaning house while Kevin Sullivan (with the black eye patch like a pirate) cackles maniacally outside the ring!
** JACKIE FARGO eliminated by GIANT SILVA when Kevin Sullivan pulled down the top rope from the outside!!! BIG boos for that one!!! **
Giant Silva towers over the competition and unleashes his primal roar!!! But just then, the house lights flicker off into a dark, moonlit setting! Insane Clown Posse starts playing through the arena sound system! Introducing the last entrant of the night…
#10: POGO the CLOWN!!!
The gigantic Pogo the Clown enters to a massive pop, and the stare down between he and Giant Silva can induce chills. The brawl is on!
** DANNO O'MAHONEY is eliminated after an exploding New Jack guitar shot!!! **
** GIANT SILVA is eliminated by Pogo and New Jack after a kendo stick-assisted double clothesline over the tope rope!!! Kevin Sullivan is outraged by his mans loss!!! **
Winners: POGO the CLOWN & NEW JACK
** CUT **
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WORDS FROM DA BRUNE
Backstage correspondent MSD has caught up with Bruno Sammartino for his reaction to the title controversy at "Liberty or Death". He will NOT accept victory that way, and as far as he's concerned there is no champion. Buddy Rogers lost that right when he reneged on the end of the match and sold out the faithful XPW Remixed fans. Sammartino will be there at "Damage Inc" to right these terrible wrongs and prove to the world he is the undisputed BEST wrestler in the universe. As for the other happenings in XPW Remixed today, Bruno thinks The Miz is doomed if he accepts Lou Thesz's challenge. The Cannibal Cartel are a sideshow disgrace to the sport. The Grand Wizard is a pompous blowhard and Jack Pfefer can NOT be trusted. Bruno Sammartino also has a few things to say about the mysterious "disappearance" of former XPW Tag Team champions The Sicilians...
BRUNO SAMMARTINO: As a wrestler, Lou Albano was mediocre. Lou was not the best by any means and he wasn’t making much of an impact. He was just a regular preliminary guy on the card. Later, he and Tony Altamore became The Sicilians. I’m not going to tell you they became the hottest tag team in the world, because they did not, but they made a bit of an impact with the Mafia-style outfits that they wore. They got some main events, not in a major arena like Madison Square Garden, Boston Garden or Baltimore Civic Center, but in what we called the secondary clubs. They were just at a certain plateau and that was it. But I took notice of Lou every time he had a chance to do an interview – he was more the spokesperson rather than Tony Altamore. The Sicilians eventually had to break up because somebody didn’t think it them being The Sicilians was too funny, and they got a threatening little message and it was decided they better quit that.
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MAIN EVENT
** XPW Television Title **
THE MIZ (2011) versus "SUPERSTAR" BILL DUNDEE (1978)
(Title Unification Match)
versus
The Australian born Bill Dundee made quite a name for himself in pro wrestling circles, most notably – right HERE – in Memphis TN!!! Tonight, wearing a stylish Ascot hat, letterman jacket and brandishing his title belt proudly, the smiling local fan favorite glad-hands with the audience on the way to ringside. The MIZ gets the big-time main event entrance (with pre-taped footage of a helicopter landing). His “Rockstar Reality TV World Tour” continues tonight in Memphis as MIZ puts up his cherished XPW Television Championship on the line against Bill Dundee’s Southern Heavyweight Championship! With practiced Hollywood flair, Miz does the slow triumphant stroll to the ring like he’s fresh off the red carpet. The gleaming XPW Remixed TV championship glistens in his possession. MIZ actually interrupts the ring announcer by ripping the mic out of his hands, and cutting a brief promo on his opponent for the evening Bill Dundee. Miz disses Dundee’s fashion sense, size and Australian accent. But by the time he mentions Memphis in a derogatory fashion, the crowd heat is off the charts, and Bill Dundee reacts with a quick sucker-punch to Miz’s jaw – shutting him up once and for all! Big pop from the crowd for that, and Dundee begins ripping off his jacket and preparing for action – while referees hold him back and Miz scampers back to his feet, more embarrassed than anything. He fixes the crazy eye on Dundee from across the ring, while the ring announcer finally makes the Big-Time main event intro. By the time the bell rings and the two men begin to circle, all eyes are riveted upon them. Steady start, with each man exchanging takedowns, counters and reversals. Dundee finally gets the better of an exchange on the mat, and slaps the Miz on the back of his head like one might a slap a petulant child! Miz is outraged! Crowd responds enthusiastically! Good, old school match with Miz outsizing Dundee, but falling prey to the Southern Heavyweight champion’s veteran cunning. He embarrasses Miz in a few exchanges, until the infuriated XPW TV champion instigates a wild brawl that overwhelms Dundee. Miz in control and his cocky, arrogant mannerisms (and a strut straight out of the original “Nature Boy’s” playbook) draw massive crowd heat. In the end, Miz manipulates his body between the ref and Dundee – allowing Miz to STRIKE with an unseen mule kick to the Southern Heavyweight champion! Ooooo low blow! That was the advantage Miz needed, and after a brief flurry of maneuvers, reverses a spinning abdominal stretch attempt by Dundee into the Skull-Crushing finale! 1-2-3, Miz wins clean!
Winner (and STILL XPW Television Champion): THE MIZ
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CREDITS:
LOU THESZ: Lee Benaka interview
BRUNO SAMMARTINO: Baltimore Sun Interview (10/21/09)