Post by Slade on Apr 22, 2019 15:49:09 GMT -5
Season 3, Episode 16
From the Temple in Boyle Heights, Los Angeles, California
Commentary Team: Matt Striker and Vampiro
Ring Announcer: Melissa Santos
***
This week’s show begins with a scene shot inside of Dario Cueto’s darkened office. A small beam of light slowly appears outside its windows. The lock on his office door is picked. The door swings open and Jake “The Snake” Roberts and Nikki Cross enter. She can’t find either of the things she’s looking for, but then stumbles across a safe. She says they must be in there. In addition to being a master at picking door locks, Roberts is also a master at cracking safe locks. He works it over for about a minute. On the third try, he’s opened it. Inside, there are stacks of cash, a pistol, and the Gauntlet of the Gods. The key to Matanza’s safe isn’t there. Roberts grabs the Gauntlet and Cross grabs the pistol, then knocks the Gauntlet out of his hands before he can put it on. She points the pistol at him and reminds him that they had a deal. She helps him and he helps her. She says she’ll let him have the Gauntlet after he picks one more lock.
***
VS.
LUCHA UNDERGROUND TRIOS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
The Super Friends vs. The Real Americans
Aero Star, Fénix & Drago vs. Sgt. Slaughter, The Patriot & Jim Duggan
LUCHA UNDERGROUND TRIOS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
The Super Friends vs. The Real Americans
Aero Star, Fénix & Drago vs. Sgt. Slaughter, The Patriot & Jim Duggan
The Super Friends defeated The Real Americans by pinfall to retain the Lucha Underground Trios Championships. They were clearly outsized and no match for the trio of larger-than-life wrestlers who opposed them, that is, when it came to brawling around ringside. However, when it came to lucha libre, they were the better team. Although Aero Star, Fénix and Drago each took a beating from Sgt. Slaughter, The Patriot and “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan, they displayed unrivaled heart and fighting spirit that, and responded with plenty of exciting high-flying moves to keep themselves in the match. The high spot of the night belonged to Fénix, who climbed into the high-rise bleachers and then up onto the bandstand platform above the floor entrance to perform a corkscrew moonsault down into the mass of his opponents and teammates on the floor. The threat of seeing a title change was at hand when Sgt. Slaughter, who made an illegal substitution, entered the ring and put Aero Star in the Cobra Clutch. The threat was ended when Drago spit mist into the Sarge’s eyes before giving him a running blockbuster inverted DDT. Moments later, The Patriot fell victim to a meteora by Fénix and then a 450-splash by Aero Star. Moments after that, Duggan received frog splashes from all three Super Friends and Fénix pinned him for the win.
***
Dario Cueto enters his office, wearing the key to Matanza’s cell around his neck. He pours himself some tequila and then takes a seat at his desk. He grabs his telephone and makes a phone call. He places bets on tonight’s matches and then hangs up the phone. He opens his safe and pulls out a few stacks of cash. He starts counting them, then stops suddenly. He turns and looks back in the safe. He curses up a storm as he discovers that the only thing in the safe is a pile of money. He gets back on the phone and makes another call. He asks to speak to Delgado. He tells him that the Gauntlet and his pistol are missing. After a few yeses and nos, he says, “Okay, I’ll be there,” and hangs up the phone. He downs his glass of tequila and runs out the door.
***
VS.
NO MAS MATCH
Prince Puma vs. Mr. America
NO MAS MATCH
Prince Puma vs. Mr. America
This match was a down and dirty brawl right from the get-go. Mr. America attacked Prince Puma before the bell was sounded to begin the match, giving him all manner of right hands, eye gouges and back rakes before removing his weightlifting belt and whipping Puma several times. Mr. America finally backed off and Puma got up and signaled that he was ready for the match to begin, but as soon as the bell rang, a quick attack was thwarted by the so-called ‘Greatest American Wrestler’ of all-time, who continued to whip him with his belt and telling Puma to give up. Puma crawled away under the ropes, but Mr. American continued outside and did some more damage out there. Finally, after getting whipped towards the section of high-rise bleachers. Puma jumped up onto the front-railing and performed a moonsault onto a running Mr. America!
This began a slow comeback. Puma was already labouring, affecting his quickness. Nevertheless, he still managed to execute several big kicks and high-flying moves, which effectively mitigated Mr. America’s early advantage. However, Mr. America was a fierce competitor and so when Puma executed the 630-degree senton, instead of quitting, Mr. America got up immediately, as if he wasn’t even phased by the move. Puma attacked with some hard elbow strikes, but they too didn’t phase Mr. America, who hulked up and fired back with some hard right hands, a big boot, a bodyslam, and a running leg drop! Mr. America wanted Puma to quit, but he refused, so he gave him another running leg drop. He still wouldn’t quit, so he gave him another! He still won’t quit, so he gave him another and another! Unbelievably, Prince Puma wouldn’t quit!
At this point, Mr. America pulled Prince Puma out of the ring and engaged in a one-sided brawl up the Temple stairs and around the mezzanine until they stood on the area above Dario Cueto’s office. There, Mr. America told Prince Puma to quit or he would throw him down to the floor below! Puma wouldn’t quit, so Mr. America backed away and took a running start towards the edge, but Puma managed to block the hip toss with some back elbows, then got Mr. America onto his shoulders and delivered a death valley driver onto the concrete mezzanine!
The brawl continued with the luchador and the wrestler fighting their way back towards the stairs where Mr. America was sent tumbling down the stairs back to ringside. Some time later, Mr. America gave Prince Puma a piledriver onto the exposed Temple floor. Later still, Prince Puma laid out Mr. America on a table and then performed a springboard shooting star press onto him, from the ring to the outside! None of this got either one of them to say, “No Mas!”
Finally, the end of the match came after Prince Puma missed a 630-degree senton bomb attempt. Mr. America got up and went for a running leg drop, but Prince Puma rolled out of the way. An exchange of back and forth strikes ended with Puma doing a matrix evasion to avoid a clothesline and then hitting a Pelé kick! He got up and decided to apply a figure four leglock to get him to quit. He had the hold on for a while, but Mr. America hulked up and turned it over. Puma was asked a few times, but he wouldn’t give up. Mr. American shouted at him to say it, but he yelled, “NEVER!!!” Then, he gradually flipped it back over and applied a bridge into the figure-eight! Mr. America had no escape! He could not reverse this one.
Sgt. Slaughter, The Patriot and Jim Duggan were all seen running out to try to break it up, as that would be the only way to escape, but the team that defeated them in the previous match, appeared just as quickly and cut them all off. There was nothing left for Mr. America to do but to tap out and shout “NO MAS!” into the microphone!
And just like that, Prince Puma defeated Mr. America by getting him to say “No Mas!” As a consequence, Mr. America is banished from the Temple forever!
***
The door opens into the room where Matanza Cueto is locked inside of a cell. He sees a man he doesn’t know in the door way and starts to freak out. That man is Jake “The Snake” Roberts. He enters the room with a gun pointed at his back. Holding the gun is Nikki Cross. When Matanza sees her, he gets excited. She goes over to the cell to hold Matanza through the bars. In that moment of lost concentration, Roberts stops picking the lock and knocks the gun away. He tries to take the Gauntlet from Cross, but she throws it into the cell. Roberts goes to grab the pistol as Cross tells Matanza to put it on. He picks up the Gauntlet and becomes a god! He rips the cell door off its hinges and then knocks Roberts out with one punch to the gut. Cross jumps up into his arms and says that they must now show the entire world why they aren’t to be fucked with.
***
VS. w/
GRAVE CONSEQUENCES 3-ON-1 HANDICAP MATCH FOR
THE GIFT OF THE GODS
The Rabbit Tribe vs. Mil Muertes w/ Catrina
GRAVE CONSEQUENCES 3-ON-1 HANDICAP MATCH FOR
THE GIFT OF THE GODS
The Rabbit Tribe vs. Mil Muertes w/ Catrina
Mil Muertes defeated The Rabbit Tribe to retain the Gift of the Gods. The odds were against the man of a thousand deaths. However, his hunger and penchant for violence fueled him on towards victory. While the 3-on-1 assault was difficult for Mil Muertes to deal with in the opening minutes, when the Rabbit Tribe tried to roll him into a coffin, he fought them off, giving Paul London a spinning urinage slam onto the coffin lid. London was out of it for the remainder of the match while Mil Muertes manhandled Saltador and Mala Suerte. Mil Muertes gave Mala Suerte a Reaper’s Trident spear through a table in the corner and then put him in a coffin and closed the lid shut on him. Later, he gave Saltador the Flatliner before putting him into a coffin and shutting the lid closed on him. As he did, Paul London watched from afar and didn’t try to stop it. Once both his tribesmen were closed in their coffins, London squealed with delight and merrily danced away from ringside. Having abandoned his teammates and the match, the referee called the match in favour of Mil Muertes, who exited with Catrina, the Gift of the Gods, and a pair of coffins carrying the bodies of Saltador and Mala Suerte who are never to be seen again.
***
Dario Cueto meets with Los Angeles City Councilman Delgado in the alley behind the Temple. He is incredibly nervous. Delgado tells him that everything’s okay and not to worry about a thing. The lord has sent him here to tell him that he has been re-assigned. Cueto is pissed. He refuses to go, saying that it is his Temple. He tells Delgado that he can make this right. Delgado says that it isn’t his decision to make, saying that he is to leave the Temple immediately and a replacement will be installed tonight. Cueto asks for an opportunity to appeal this decision. Delgado tells him that he’ll see what he can do.
***
VS. w/
LUCHA UNDERGROUND CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Samoa Joe vs. “Macho King” Randy Savage w/ Sensational Queen Sherri
LUCHA UNDERGROUND CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Samoa Joe vs. “Macho King” Randy Savage w/ Sensational Queen Sherri
There was a big fight feel in the Temple for this one. The Believers were simply electric as the Samoan Submission Machine and the Macho King grappled. The match started out slowly with both luchadores showing off their technical acumen. In the open minutes of the match, there were several headlocks, wristlocks, hammerlocks and chin lock variations employed. Both luchadores showed great skill in applying the holds but also in breaking them. The first 5-minutes of this contest merely teased that there was greater violence to come, with Savage breaking a headlock with a side belly-to-back suplex, and Joe breaking a hammerlock by tripping Savage and quickly falling on him with a senton bomb.
Joe began to transition from applying holds to hitting Savage with moves that have greater impact. Savage stalled his moment with some snake eyes, then grabbed his hair and executed a hair-pull hangman, after which grabbed Joe by the foot and pulled him out of the ring with the intent to brawl his way to gaining a greater advantage. However, Joe struck Savage with some stinging chops and then dropped him with a hard headbutt. Joe didn’t let up. He took Savage and gave him a snap suplex on the floor before sending him back into the ring. As Savage tried to sit up, Joe put him in the Coquina Clutch, but it was short-lived as Savage quickly scrambled to get a foot on the bottom rope. Savage headed to the outside to regroup with the help of the Sensational Queen Sherri. However, Joe had other plans, as he sent Savage crashing into the retaining wall of one of the bleacher sections with a tope suicida. Sherri yanked hard on Joe’s hair and slapped him across the face, which immediately got his attention. What went unseen was Sherri dropping the royal sceptre next to the Macho King, who picked it up and hit Joe in the back of skull with it as he slowly walked towards Sherri, who stumbled backwards away from him in fear.
Following that blow, Savage took control, slamming Joe’s face into the ring post and giving him a running high-knee to the back that sent him crashing into the announce table, where Savage then walloped Joe in the face with a monitor. Back in the ring, Savage continued the assault. He registered several pinfall attempts but couldn’t put the champion away. After a few minutes, he gave up trying to win that way and applied a figure-four leglock, but that didn’t do the trick either, as Joe eventually flipped it over to reverse the pressure and forcing Savage to reach out for the ropes. After they got back up, Savage tried to quickly attack Joe, but he ran right into a Samoan drop and long 2-count.
At this point, Joe took over and started hitting Savage with several high impact maneuvers, including an inverted atomic drop, a dropkick, and a running senton bomb. Joe gave Savage a few release German suplexes and then a running boot to the face. Joe went for a few covers, but Savage kicked out of them all, with the exception of the pinfall that followed Joe’s brainbuster. Savage got his foot on the bottom rope, with the help of Sherri. This move didn’t go unseen by senior referee Marty Elias, who then ordered Sherri barred from ringside. Sherri put up quite a fuss and got into a shouting match with Elias. Meanwhile, Joe took Savage and placed him on the top turnbuckle, from where he lifted him off and executed the Musclebuster! Joe covered but Elias was busy arguing with Sherri. Finally, Joe got his attention and he rushed back in to count the pin. 1… 2… Sherri pulled Elias out to the floor and kicked him in the crotch! … 3… 4… 5… Joe got up and chased down Sherri, putting her in the Coquina Clutch and causing her to pass out!
When he was done with her, he turned his attention back to Savage, who was no longer in the ring. He could see Savage labouring at the side of the ring, so he went around to get him. Once he was upon him, he took a chair to the face. Joe was in a daze and Savage threw him in the ring, where he gave him another chair shot and a DDT onto the chair. Savage then pinned him. Referee ‘Lefty’ Borden showed up and counted the fall. 1…2… kick out! Savage was upset. Still, he picked up Joe and gave him a vertical suplex and then climbed the turnbuckle and nailed the diving elbow drop! 1… 2… shoulder up! Savage couldn’t believe it! He got into an argument with the referee over it before striking him with a nasty hook that knocked him out. Savage went out and woke Elias. Then, he went to the top rope and attempted another diving elbow drop, but this time he missed. Joe had rolled out of the way.
When they both got up, Joe locked on the Coquina Clutch. Desperate to get out of it, Savage grabbed Elias by the shirt collar. They spun around until Elias ended up in the corner, where he was repeated squashed between the turnbuckle and the weight of Savage pushing Joe back into the corner to try to break the hold. It didn’t work, however. All it did was knock out Marty Elias again. Joe put Savage to sleep, but with no conscious official around to take notice, the match could not end.
And then came everyone’s worst nightmare.
Matanza Cueto, wearing the Gauntlet of the Gods, attacked Joe. Encouraged by Nikki Cross to destroy the luchador who took the Lucha Underground Championship from him, Matanza gave Joe a release German suplex, followed by an Athletic-plex, a standing moonsault and a standing shooting star press! Then, he picked up Joe and gave him the Wrath of the Gods!
It was at this time that Dario Cueto exited his office to find that his brother was wearing the Gauntlet of the Gods. Cueto got his attention and tried to talk him into giving him the gauntlet, but Nikki Cross reminded him that his brother is the enemy and told him he must be destroyed. When she pointed at Dario, Matanza jumped out of the ring. Dario ran away, not into his office, but down the hall beside it, with Matanza and Cross in pursuit.
Meanwhile, Sherri had regained consciousness and was working to get Savage to be the same. Once she succeeded, Savage took a look at the situation, climbed the turnbuckle and landed the diving elbow drop. Sherri woke both referees, and there was no doubt as they both slowly counted 1…… 2…... 3! “Macho King” Randy Savage defeated Samoa Joe by pinfall.
THE NEW LUCHA UNDERGROUND CHAMPION
“MACHO KING” RANDY SAVAGE
***
PRESIDENT TRUMP
We go inside the Oval Office where the President sits at his desk eating a Big Mac while reviewing video footage of the Real Americans losing their Lucha Underground Trios Championship match and Mr. American getting banished from the Temple by saying, “No Mas!”. He stopped the video and plays it back a few times, hearing Mr. America say those Spanish words over and over. It looks like the President is seriously pissed off. He shows up that is the case when he shouts towards the screen that they’re all a bunch of fucking pathetic losers. He picks up his phone and tells his secretary to get him on the line with Mr. America.
Mr. America answers the phone to find an irate President Trump ripping into him about how poorly they are making American wrestlers look before telling him, “YOU’RE ALL FIRED!”
Moments after he hangs up the phone, his intercom buzzes in to tell him that Agent VKM has arrived for his emergency meeting. The President says to send him on in right away. He comes in and shakes hands with the President who complains about the luchadores taking over America and how he thought he had assembled the very best and the most tremendous group of wrestlers the world has ever seen, but they all turned out to be pathetic losers. He wants to know what he must do.
Agent VKM says that the problem is he intrusted a group of wrestlers to do a sports entertainer’s job, and that it isn’t wrestling that he wants to make great again, it’s sports entertainment. As a major entertainment superstar himself, the President understands his agent’s message and wants him to spearhead a new mission code named “MEGA.”
Finally, our camera gets a shot of the face of Agent VKM as he guarantees that lucha libre has “no chance in hell” of surviving the coming onslaught of his team of sports entertainment superstars. They will tear down the Temple in Boyle Heights and Make (Sports) Entertainment Great Again!
AGENT VKM
***
Dario Cueto jumps into the back of a black limousine parked in the alley behind the Temple. He takes a seat next to Delgado and thanks him for getting this meeting. He tells the lord, who is sat at the other end, his face hidden in the dark shadows, that his brother Matanza has the Gauntlet of the Gods so it is imperative that he remain in the Temple because he is the only one who he will listen to. A voice from the shadows says, “No, Dario, you’re not the only one he will listen to.” With a look of shock on his face, Dario says, “Papa!” Delgado says to Dario that there are bigger things at play than his love of lucha libre, and the lord’s decision is final. He is to be replaced by Antonio Cueto. The man sits forward, and we can see his face. He tells Dario, “Yes, it’s me, papa.” Then the sound of a gun firing through a silencer is heard. Dario grabs at his stomach, while crying out, “Why?! Why?!” Antonio gives a half-hearted apology but says that he has failed the gods and he has failed his family. But he will no longer. The next moment, we see the limo door open and Dario’s body gets tosses out into a heap of ripped apart trash bags strung along the bottom of a chain link fence. Then, the door shuts and the limo pulls away.
ANTONIO CUETO IS HERE!
***