Post by fifthhorseman on Jan 15, 2017 1:22:23 GMT -5
UWF FRIDAY NIGHT’S MAIN EVENT
EPISODE 12
EPISODE 12
Tony Schiavone: This is UWF Friday Night’s Main Event, and we are live from the Rimrock Auto Arena in Billings, Montana! Fans, after the unparalleled chaos that took place last week, you cannot afford to miss the opening of tonight’s broadcast. Triple H, Randy Orton, Kenny Omega, Perry Saturn, and Sean O’Haire will all be here – live! And that’s just the beginning of our show!
Mike Tenay: We also have a big title defense tonight, with North American champion Jay Lethal taking on Bobby Eaton of the Midnight Express. Datlon Castle battles Nick Bockwinkel in solo competition, and Jake Roberts makes his UWF debut against the wild man from Amarillo, Terry Funk! But it looks like it’s time to get some questions answered, so let’s get straight to the ring!
Triple H led the way for his group, surrounded by security, and into a ring surrounded by even more security guards. It was a bizarre arrangement, but somehow, “the Game” secured virtual amnesty for the night from Commissioner Watts – in other words, they would get their chance to speak tonight without fear of the entire UWF locker room coming for retribution… but only tonight.
The quintet entered the squared circle, full of casual arrogance. Triple H took the microphone that was waiting in the ring, and said, “It is great to be in the Universal Wrestling Federation… I really mean that. And you should feel honored that we wanted to be here. It took some work, some gaming of the MUW system, if you will, but we’re here. The Authority is here.
The rest of this dialogue is going to be part fact, part fiction – you figure it out.
“I’d been waiting in contractual limbo for months. And while I sat, I started making calls, recruiting some of the best wresters in the world. I knew exactly who I wanted, and by God, every single one of them is in this ring. I wanted men that wanted nothing but money, and power, and championship gold around their waists. You’re looking at them. I wanted men that would have my back every step of the way, and that’s why my first call went out to an old friend.”
He looked at Orton for a second, but then sneered and wrapped his arm around Perry Saturn’s shoulders. “You think I meant Randy? No, in this case, I meant someone I knew from way back in the day. Someone I came up with. When the Radicalz came over to WWE a few years back, everyone got excited about Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero coming in. A few people were happy that ‘we’ got Dean Malenko. Not me. I’m a Perry Saturn guy.”
“Now let’s talk about the ‘Apex Predator’ himself, Mr. Randy Orton. Multi-time World champion. Third-generation superstar, it’s in his blood. When I put together Evolution, I knew that he would be the future of the company – and he was. Ruthless, relentless, and he’s still in his prime… hell, he’s better than ever. He can take any title he wants to in the UWF, and it’s a matter of time until he’s doing just that.”
“But let’s talk about the future now. Kenny Omega. He had the balls to say, “I’m gonna go overseas and make myself the most coveted commodity in our industry… and then he did just that."
"He has more skill and charisma in his little finger than the entire Junior Heavyweight division – you think Roderick Strong can go toe-to-toe with this guy? Give me a break. But I bet you’re wondering something, aren’t you. Didn’t Randy Orton RKO him a couple of weeks ago? Yes – yes, he did. But you never saw this angle, did you?”
A replay showed on the screen, showing the usually-crushing finished, but this time, it looked different. Triple H continued. “Sowing the seeds of confusion, that’s all. Kenny knew what was coming all along. The stupid crowd was so shocked, and so excited, to see Randy that they never actually focused on what happened. Randy laid it in nice and easy, and Mr. Omega here sold it like a champ.”
“Let’s talk about Evolution again, shall we? After all, this group in front of you right now… it’s evolution as well. Better than what came before us. I finally got my hands on the clay I wanted in the past… 270 pounds of untapped potential. An unmatched combination of speed, power, and style: Sean O’Haire. I know that you remember Batista, and that worked out… OK. But before that, me and Ric auditioned another guy – strangely enough, it was Sean’s partner in WCW – and his name was Mark Jindrak. But that never worked out. I wanted Sean, but Roddy Piper got to him first… and look how that turned out. But this time, Sean saw the light… but I’m not telling you anything you don’t already know.”
“We are the Authority, and we run this place now. Bret Hart, you’re merely holding my World Heavyweight belt for me. Strong – you’re holding the Junior Heavyweight belt for Kenny Omega. Freebirds – my associate Randy Orton is going to lead Perry and Sean to your titles. And Jay Lethal – assuming you retain that North American championship tonight – we’re just going to flip a coin to decide who gets to wear that one. Up until now, we’ve just toyed with you – getting a sound guy to play a song, hiring a ring guy to trip up “Dr. Death”… good times. But now –“
The monologue was interrupted by the Newer Age Outlaws, who justifiably felt betrayed by their one-time leader. With Kevin Kelly by his side, Jesse James said, “I’m usually a fella that likes to talk and talk, too, but tonight ain’t the night for that. Right here, right now. Any three of you against the three of us. Let’s go!”
The Authority laughed and huddled together. A few seconds later, Orton said, “I guess you’re first.”
COMMERCIAL
THE AUTHORITY vs. THE NEWER AGE OUTLAWS:
vs.
O’Haire and Palumbo – former partners themselves – started the match by trading big right hands in the middle of the ring. The powerhouses exchanged punches and kicks for several moments before tagging out, and James and Saturn locked up. The former Radical took charge, though, and then the “Road Dogg” was the face in peril for several minutes. The Authority toyed with him, but they could not pin him. A missed dropkick by Orton gave his opponent the chance to tag in Gunn, and the Outlaw took charge, press-slamming “the Viper” over his head before slamming him to the mat hard. He stayed on the offensive, throwing Orton from pillar to post, and the other four men started fighting on the outside. The referee let the brawl continue, knowing that the crowd was loving it. It ended in sudden fashion, though, when Gunn got tripped up attempting a “Fameasser”, and Orton hit a split-second RKO to end the match. The victors left, hands raised all the way up the ramp, cautiously watching their backs.
As they left, a backstage interview was shown with Kevin Kelly and the UWF World Trios champions, the Fabulous Freebirds. As usual, Hayes did all the talking. “Looks like this division just keeps getting tougher and tougher. Listen here, Authority – you won’t get a second chance to jump us from behind. If you want to sack up and fight us like men, well, bring it on. We’re the best in the world, boys.”
COMMERCIAL
Before the next match began, Schaivone and Tenay hyped the MUW Expansion Draft, wherein massive shake-ups were bound to ensue – and given the 50-wrestler roster cap imposed by Commissioner Watts, no one’s position could be considered safe.
NICK BOCKWINKEL vs. DALTON CASTLE (w/the Boys):
vs.
While everyone in the crowd was well-aware of Bockwinkel’s technical prowess, most tended to underestimate the skills of the NCAA-trained Castle, whose ring entrance brought them to their feet. Once the bell rang, it was a surprisingly closely-contested wrestling match, with “the Peacock” exerting his will early on with throws and suplexes. The AWA great rolled to the outside to compose himself, and after a quick poke to Castle’s eye, reversed the momentum. The match was all Bockwinkel after that, and he finished off his foe with a crunching piledriver after ten minutes of crisp action.
COMMERCIAL
UWF NORTH AMERICAN HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
BOBBY EATON (w/Jim Cornette and Matt Morgan) vs. JAY LETHAL (C):
vs.
The entourage from Hot Stuff International entered the ring first; the newly-crowned champion walked down the ramp a moment later, the gold over his shoulder. As two of the smoothest operators in the UWF eyed the North American title, the referee calmly spoke to Cornette and Morgan, warning them that the slightest misstep would get them both ejected from ringside. As usual, Cornette flipped out, while “the Blueprint” fumed.
“Beautiful Bobby” went hold-for-hold with the champ early on, seeking to keep Lethal on the mat. Lethal’s strategy was to stay on his feet, and go to the top rope whenever possible. The match was a contest of wills, and it went over 15 minutes, but it ended when Eaton went for a swinging neckbreaker, and the champion reversed it into a small package. Before the ref could raise the winner’s hand, Morgan stepped in and hit Lethal with a discus clothesline. He picked him up and set him for a powerbomb, but America’s Least Wanted made the save.
After the match, Kevin Kelly stood backstage with UWF World champion Bret Hart, who made an open challenge to any member of the Authority to battle him next week on UWF Friday Night’s Main Event… in his hometown, in Calgary.
COMMERCIAL
Before the last match of the night began, a 60-second highlight package from Mid-South Mayhem was shown, interspersed with some of the individuals available in the Expansion Draft. Then, a pre-taped interview was shown, featuring the “Aerial Assassin”, Will Ospreay, who made it known in no uncertain terms that Kenny Omega would have to go through him before getting any sort of Mid-South Junior Heavyweight title shot.
TERRY FUNK vs. JAKE ROBERTS:
vs.
“The Snake’s” first match in the UWF was a definite test, given Funk’s recent status as a World title contender… and just the way he liked it. No sense starting at the bottom.
Funk attacked at the bell, but Roberts repelled him with a series of left jabs. Undaunted, the two locked up and, a few minutes later, Nick Bockwinkel strolled to the commentary booth to lend his “expertise”. It continued to be a 50/50 struggle between the two second-generation stars, though Funk noticeably weakened Roberts’ knee, looking to apply his spinning toe hold.
Eventually, the two wound up outside the ring and brawled it up. The referee started his count, and as fists continued to fly, the AWA icon left the booth and walked halfway down the ramp. Roberts whipped Funk into the steps, and then he noticed Bockwinkel. “The Snake” took a couple of steps toward him, and his antagonist did not back down. However, he realized that he’d rather capture the winner’s purse, and rolled underneath the bottom rope into the ring… unfortunately, Funk crawled back a second before he did, just before the ref got to ten. The wild Texan won, but it was a hollow victory, and Roberts and Bockwinkel stared each other down as the show ended.