Post by MadStepDad on Oct 5, 2012 18:51:33 GMT -5
Cut to the in-studio announce team for the evening:
Gordon Solie & Matt Striker
Cold intro and welcome to the show. We get a “last week on XPW TV…” (w/ the controversial Sheamus/Movement XPW Remixed Boston match - Sable winning the XPW Remixed Woman’s championship - LOD vs. Dudz announcement - and Cena vs. Taz. But this already historic night was magnificently topped off by the announcement that shook the fantasy wrestling world: STRANGLER LEWIS is officially making his comeback! More words on that development from the XPW Remixed president himself - coming up right now…
** CUT **
** A Word From the Company **
(Intro)
Simple, yet elegant opening statement from XPW Remixed president Ed “Strangler” Lewis. The company is doing everything the can to recover in the wake of the incident (on XPW TV Episode #50) that caused the company to hemorrhage money and will continue to provide top-notch fantasy wrestling entertainment for the fans. That is why GDT Inc has unanimously agreed to sign, sanction and license a new full-time competitor to the XPW Remixed World championship division. This new future world champion will be announced TONIGHT. On commentary, Solie & Striker liken it to the “policemen” vs. “bounty hunters” of yore in which world championship belts had to be kept closely to the vest - and not held up for ransom by untrustworthy forces who may seek to discredit or desecrate your title… "once you believe... you die".
** TONIGHT!! **
XPW Remixed TV Title tourney semi-finals!
A "Hollywood superstar" adds firepower to the line-up!
Strangler Lewis big announcement!
and
JOHN CENA (2012) versus TAZ (2000)
II
STAY TUNED!!
** CUT TO RING **
_____________________________________________________________
JINDER MAHAL (2014) versus… ROB VAN DAM (2006)!!
versus
Jinder Mahal stalks to the ring for an angry promo, in which he hails himself a hero for challenging the corruption of American sporting policies. Announcers recap how Mahal helped have RVD stripped of his championship due to a PED technicality. Due to those actions, Mahal thought he should have automatically been awarded the TV title - instead he was forced to fight an opponent he was unprepared for! (Jack Brisco: see XPW TV Episode #56) Therefore Mahal is going to blah blah blah… we’re finally cut off by the entrance music of RVD 4:20! He makes his triumphant return to XPW Remixed from his suspension with a brief (yet exciting, high-flying) revenge squash match against the haughty and pompous Jinder Mahal. 5-Star Frog Splash (after blatant 4:20 mannerisms get the crowd amped) ends Mahal’s night emphatically. Post match, RVD 4:20 actually grabs a house mic and let loose a torrid shoot rant. Before the mic gets cut off, he basically says he’s leaving XPW Remixed (joining Bowsers camp) - and encourages all his fans to follow! They cheer!!!
Winner: ROB VAN DAM
** ABRUPT CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
”A Paid Promotional Piece”
There’s a commercial that runs for a new wrestling school/league. It is lead by Paul Bowser, and it is promising tutelage from such superstar names as:
ROCKY MARCIANO!
MIL MASCARAS!
and..
Welterweight champion of the world:
GEORGES ST. PIERRE!!
Sign up now!!
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
XPW Remixed Commissioner Jack Pfefer speaks... (just not on the topic of Rob Black - who he has been avoiding like the plague since ousting him publically as part-owner). With Lewis & Mondt off-site this week, that leaves Pfefer officially in charge of the show tonight. He announces a huge tag team match pitting the "Trustbusters" (Sammartino & Thesz) against the modern day team of Samoa Joe & Gunner) tonight. Also - a huge "Hollywood Superstar" recruited by Jack Pfefer himself to add spark and sizzle to the XPW Remixed Woman's division! Stay tuned and find out who! Meanwhile, Jack Pfefer has business to attend to... you're dismissed.
** CUT TO RING **
_______________________________________________________________
** XPW TV title tourney **
ALBERTO DEL RIO (w/ Ricardo Rodriguez)
versus
HUMAN TORNADO
w/ vs.
Human Tornado jukes-n-jives… Ricardo Rodriguez plays the straight-man foil… and Alberto Del Rio shines like a priceless diamond under pressure. He ruthlessly stalks and weakens Tornado’s arm, which is the story of the match. Human Tornado manages to get a few spots off (mostly at Ricardo’s expense, and in humorous fashion) - but a Del Rio armbar ends the match like Rakim (“I Ain’t No Joke!”) Del Rio & Ricardo Rodriguez get the in-ring celebration… post match, cameras catch a dejected Human Tornado get MOCKED backstage by an obnoxious wig-wearing Gorgeous George Wagner! Double whammy for Tornado tonight!
Winner (by submission): ALBERTO DEL RIO
Gorgeous George Wagner has jokes to make about Human Tornado's loss - but he's just one pimp-snap away from a witty comeback...
** CUT **
JACK BRISCO (1974) versus DAMIEN SANDOW (2014)
versus
Squared circle masterpiece written by these two scholars of the game. Even with 40 years evolution, Damien Sandow proves no match for the wrestling genius of Jack Brisco classic. Another true fantasy wrestling dream match that finds Jack Brisco winning with his trusty Figure-4 leglock.
Winner (by submission): JACK BRISCO
** CUT **
** THE BRACKETS **
Jinder Mahal vs Jack Brisco [debut] | Jack Brisco | |
John Morrison vs Damien Sandow | Damien Sandow | Jack Brisco |
Winner | ||||
Winner | ||||
Gorgeous George vs Human Tornado | Human Tornado | Alberto Del Rio | Winner | |
Alberto Del Rio vs Colt Cabana | Alberto Del Rio |
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Brief words with XPW Remixed Boston champion Sheamus on his recent challenges with Rashad Cameron’s “movement” - and the match demands set upon him tonight (Sheamus has been assigned a match against Cryme Tyme 2.0 and must find his own partner). Before Sheamus can get too deep into his retort promo, none other than the wicked DEAN AMBROSE saunters on to the scene! He slyly teases the title shot he holds, and notes Sheamus’ predicament tonight. Dean Ambrose offers Sheamus his partnership tonight against Cryme Tyme 2.0 - but Sheamus slyly (and with a witty, pointed barb) DECLINES. Something old and Irish about knowing the snakes that you lay with. Either way, Sheamus ultimate goal is to use his XPW Boston championship as world title collateral and seek his rematch with Lou Thesz… (see “Baptized in Blood II”)… see the fire blaze in Dean Ambrose eyes as Sheamus swaggers out of the scene with his championship belt…
** CUT TO RING **
_____________________________________________________________
SANDMAN versus NECRO BUTCHER
(“Xtreme Elimination Chamber qualifying match”)
versus
Segment starts like a Law-and-Order sketch, with video recap of Sandman & Necro Butcher’s anti-hardcore “protest” being topped off by the legal representation of David Otunga and the following match conundrum. Both Sandman and Necro Butcher receive hellacious BOOS from the audience, and play to them accordingly. Their *match* is devastatingly boring to start. They exchange sloppy “wrestling” exchanges, and counters, and head locks (lots of headlocks) until slowly but surely the hardcore quotient is raised in their bloodlines. It starts innocently enough with Necro Butcher pounding his OWN head with a steel chair - to prove a point to his partner. But that spurs Sandman to respond with the classic beer can to his own forehead bit to one-up him. It finishes with Necro convincing Sandman (with the crowds urging of course) to sit down on a chair opposite him in the ring and exchange shoot punches. Eventually chairs, guardrails, Kendo sticks and hard cement bumps abound. Until David Otunga - in suit and tie - runs down to the ring and convinces them to stop. At least he thinks he does... unbeknownst to him, Sandman & Necro Butcher exchange a discreet glance - before twin clobbering him from behind with their steel chair/Kendo stick combination! David Otunga goes down in a heap! Crowd cheers! Necro & Sandman just exchange wild-eyed, disturbed glares (akin to Team Hell No in WWE 2012) before walking out their separate ways!
Winner (none): NO FINISH
A Blast from the Xtreme past for David Otunga tonight!
** CUT **
** Xtreme Elimination Chamber **
(Prize Box)
This year - in addition to the juice, prize money & trophy - the winner gets award winning, XPW Original classic arm candy JASMIN ST CLAIRE! Winner to do with her as they please - WHEN they please!
** CUT TO RING **
** Scaffold Match **
(Successfully retrieve the key hanging from the ceiling)
The Sheik def. Snuff / Sami Callihan / Masada
(Winner will be the last man released into the Xtreme Elimination Chamber @ “AHiH”. Kilo is on guest commentary alongside Solie & Striker - irking them completely. Kilo even has a terse shouting match with Sami while the "New Horror" is perched high above the ring on the scaffold. It is that distraction from the KotDM champion that allows The Sheik to blindside Callihan from the rear and claim the key for himself. He even locks Sami Callihan in an elongated version of his camel clutch submission - while on top of the scaffold!)
Winner: THE SHEIK
** CUT **
The horror that began during commentary on the last match (especially when the touchy subject of Sammi Lane - still a blank, hollow valet to Kilo at ringside - came up) - climaxes after the match. Kilo - apparently wound up tightly from the previous violence - gets in a wicked screaming, shouting match with Gordon Solie! He even SLAPS the headset off the classic commentators head! This is going beyond the scripted lines of reality here, and even Matt Striker has to step up to politely tell Kilo to chill out. Bad move! Kilo suddenly and violently *SNAPS* on Matt Striker! Kilo grabs him over the announce table and pulverizes him around ringside! Gordon Solie is horrified on commentary, hollering for security to intervene! Kilo taunts and pounds Striker some more before crushing him with a 400 lb+ Vader Bomb! He’s about to do it again - when suddenly… the entire arena goes BLACK…
Lone spotlights, mysterious symbols, dark mists rising - it can mean only one thing: enter THE MESSIAH. He speaks to Kilo from the pulpit of some dark church somewhere on the video screen - he curses Kilo’s reign, promises unholy vengeance and declares their duel at “Another Halloween in Hell” to be a RAVENLOFT DEATH MATCH (the most dreaded of it’s kind - see XPW Remixed presents “Halloween in Hell”)!! A supernatural bolt of LIGHTNING strikes the ring where Kilo stands and it frightens the wild-eyed madman into grabbing his hypnotized mistress Sammi Lane and fleeing backstage. The Ravenloft logo lingers… Gordon Solie speaks solemnly of these atrocities.. And Matt Striker is wheeled from the arena on a stretcher…
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Jack Pfefer watches the whole scene unfold, including the "Ravenloft Death Match" threats from Messiah. He's clearly very perturbed and spooked over the supernatural stalking. Pfefer swallows hard and resists the urge to puke in his own mouth, as he reaches for the office phone and makes a call... he's dialing up Rob Black. No, Pfefer wasn't avoiding him. He was busy cleaning up messes Rob Black left behind. The coast is almost clear for Rob Blacks return - he just needs to take care of one more thing for Pfefer... just then roving XPW Remixed cameras lose transmission before Jack Pfefer can call in his dark favor...
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
_____________________________________________________________
SHEAMUS versus CRYME TYME 2.0 (w/ Rashad Cameron)
versus w/
With his championship caliber credibility, handicap match experience and blustery, Irish ego - Sheamus has chosen to go at this match alone. Despite the seemingly overwhelming odds, Sheamus certainly has the track record to back him up (see his legendary XPW Remixed battles with the Triple Threat and Revolution). But in this case, his “Great White” pride is relentlessly (and ruthlessly) thrashed around the ring by the *real* N.W.A. camp. They use their numbers (and a strategically placed steel chain shot from associate Michael Tarver) to beat Sheamus into a welted, red pulp. They take turns gang beating him, wolf pack style. Ricky Reyes with a complicated crossface stretch outside the ring, around the ring post. All 5 men wind up getting their finishing shots off, climaxing with a BLKJEEZ double footstomp from Rashad Cameron off the top rope (to a steel chair held over Sheamus’ face by JTG). BUCK BUCK. Blam to dem all.
Winners: CRYME TYME 2.0
We eventually get the minor baby face run-in to clear the ring (with guys like Ruckus, Weedman & Colt Cabana playing the heroes). But the statement made by Rashad Cameron and his “Movement” speaks volumes. With his crew slinking backstage, and Sheamus being helped to his feet - the real fireworks are about to begin…
** MATCH SEGUE **
** XPW Remixed Boston championship **
SHEAMUS (2012) © versus DEAN AMBROSE (2014)
versus
Dean Ambrose to pick up the scraps. He starts with a bevy of steel chair shots that clear everybody out of the ring - before pounding Sheamus back into the mat like a railroad spike. 1!.. 2!.. KICKOUT! OMG Sheamus kicked out! Crowd pops! Ambrose is incredulous! A brief match ensues, but Sheamus fights through the dizzying effects of his concussion to land a surprise brogue kick from out of nowhere for the pin! 1!.. 2!.. 3!! Sheamus retains!
Winner (and STILL XPW Remixed Boston champion): SHEAMUS
But the spectacle still ain’t over. Sheamus can barely walk at this point, dragging himself to his feet - while Dean Ambrose is going BALLISTIC on the official! He winds up striking the ref and hitting him with a DVD finisher! Just then XPW Remixed commissioner JACK PFEFER makes the run in to declare that wasn’t a *legal* match - therefore the result is nullified… with a woozy Sheamus finally flaring to life and about to grab Jack Pfefer by his coat lapels… Ambrose strikes from behind with another steel chair shot! Reverse DDT! DVD finisher! Jack Pfefer demands the bell-keeper “ring the f**** bell!” and then slides into the ring to make the count himself! 1!.. 2!.. 3!!?!?
Winner (and NEW XPW Remixed Boston champion): DEAN AMBROSE!!
Crowd goes nuclear over the finish, audibly chanting “BULL***!” (even while small pockets of rabid Dean Ambrose fans go wild). Jack Pfefer is presenting the belt to Dean Ambrose - when Sheamus shakes off the cobwebs… turns berserker rage… and charges at Dean Ambrose with a Brogue Kick! But Dean Ambrose must have seen it coming out of the corner of his eye, because he dodges at the last moment - and Sheamus runs through Jack Pfefer with the brogue kick instead! BAM the diminutive promoter hits the canvas like he was shot close range with a high powered rifle! Dean Ambrose dives for cover outside the ring, leaving Sheamus behind! With a grimace and a growl, Sheamus holds up the discarded Boston title - *HIS* Boston championship - over the unconscious body of Jack Pfefer and pounds his chest! FELLLLAAAA!!! Dean Ambrose is the “champion” but Sheamus has physical custody of the belt! And he’s leaving with it!!
** CUT TO COMMERCIAL **
______________________________________________________________
SABLE/ TRISH STRATUS/ WENDI RICHTER/ & ALEXXIS NEVAEH
versus
NATALYA NEIDHART/ ANNIE SOCIAL / TAMINA / & MELINA (!?)
versus
Focus here is primarily on the fantasy wrestling dream team of Richter (80s), Sable (90s), Trish (2000s) and Alexxis (2010s) congealing effortlessly and sending the popularity of woman’s fantasy wrestling soaring to new plateaus. Their foils are set up to be competitive (but not overwhelming)… until the introduction of their 4th (and mystery) partner… with great flair and aplomb, Nattie Neidhart introduces (from “Hollywood” to teach us all how to stunt)… MELINA!! She gets the entire vain (and elongated video entrance) - including the pulling up in limo - exiting onto red carpet - and making her way through with security. As an outsider she speaks disdainfully of XPW Remixed woman’s division - a challenge that is answered head on by the 1st champion in company history ALEXXIS NEVAEH! These two in particular carry the bulk of the in-ring action, while storyline tension and friction between Sable (current champion) and Trish (former champion) play out alongside.
Alexxis helps drive the disrespectful invader back (even promising Melina in promos and online clips that if she wanted a fight she could find one with Alexxis) - the bad girls come off good - but the collaborative auras of the heroes are overpowering. Richter hit’s a Rocker Dropper leg drop to Tamina - only to be outdone by Sable, who power bombs Annie Social into oblivion - just to have Trish Stratus come from out of nowhere (the legal participant) to smash Nattie Neidhart with a sprinboard bulldog for the pin! Trish wants her belt back, and apparently Sable (who had been calling her out during Trish’s reign) is happy to oblige! She makes the challenge official - Sable © vs. Trish Stratus - next week on XPW TV - for the XPW Remixed Woman’s championship! Winner is crowned undisputed fantasy diva and will run the show @ “AHiH”! Oh my! What an announcement! Sable vs. Trish next XPW TV for the championship!! TUNE IN!
Winners: Sable, Trish, Wendi & Alexxis
Fantasy Wrestling Dream Match!
** XPW Remixed Woman's title **
Sable (1999) © vs. Trish Stratus (2006)
Next XPW TV Episode!!
** CUT **
________________________________________________________________
** DARK MATCHES **
A segment that puts over cut matches in fast, MTV-styled, video hype clips - usually set to some kind of heavy metal or Hip Hop background music.. this is the kind of stuff that would have appeared on the now-dormant XPW Online, or within the 3rd hour of XPW TV that has been lost...
Prime Time Playaz (Kaos & Titus) w/ GG def. Kendrick & London
(The new “Focus” branded PtP earn a tough victory over Brian & Paul and sell it like they won the Superbowl)
Mildred Burke def. Lizzy Borden
(She does it legally - and after calling out Lizzy Borden and ripping her neck brace off (see “The 18th Letter”) - quickly, efficiently and with great glee. Painful Regal Stretch submission from Burke has bad girl Borden screaming uncle)
Gorgeous George def. John Morrison
(Focus on the lingering neck injury of Morrison, and the "Human Orchid" wins with a Rude Awakening neckbreaker)
Colt "Boom Boom" Cabana def. Heath Slater (w/ Honky Tonk Man)
(A continuation of their feud that has spanned the Territory Wars - see "WCW presents "Halloween Havoc nights 1 & 2")
Fabulous Kangaroos def. Uso’s
(Entertaining International clash of styles on the greatest tag team stage in the Territory Wars. Uso’s look good in defeat, but the FabKangs are eager to reestablish themselves)
Tommaso Ciampa def. Weedman (w/ Ruckus) & Jeremy Buck (w/ Max Buck) & Chris Sabin (w/ Alex Shelley)
(Fatal 4-Way)
(Despite having no back-up whatsoever, new-look Ciampa pulls off the improbable victory. Post match Ciampa promises to bring tag team back-up with him next week on XPW TV (from the same mysterious training camp Ciampa has sought tutelage). Meanwhile - the other 6 men (3 tag teams) wind up getting into between themselves in an impromptu, tornado tag free-for-all… until…)
Pitbulls unscripted rampage
(Pitbulls rampage through the ring, tearing through the smaller tag teams like rabid dogs ripping through fresh meat. Top rope super bomb to Weedman through a table… but before the Pitbulls get too comfortable, we get a familiar theme song interruption…)
”Powers of Potential” (Morgan & Henry w/ Rogers) def. Pitbulls
(Diamonds from Sierra Leone instrumental - and Rogers tries to bribe the Pitbulls off. They seem to be considering the offer from a glib Buddy Rogers, but it’s just a set-up anyway. Mark Henry and Matt Morgan unite to wreak havoc and double-table the Pitbulls for the hell of it. Cue theme song and victorious celebration poses… Morgan & Henry - the Truest Twin Towers in the game!!)
** Dark Match main event **
Dan Severn def. Lord Tensai (w/ Onita)
(Heavyweight slobberknocker with Dan Severn hitting "beast" mode and overcoming Tensai using straight Japanese-style shoot wrestling - despite Onita's ample interference attempts that were stymied by Severn's partner Masahiko Kimura. Once again the Shooters Club proves they are the cream of the crop with an impressive victory)
** CUT **
** BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE **
Big criminal deal about Sheamus running through Jack Pfefer with the Brogue Kick - including ambulance runs and lawyer talk. Sheamus isn’t hearing any of it, and still has the physical Boston champion in his possession. Before things turn murderous Sheamus is seen leaving the building with PAUL BOWSER! Never to be seen again! Meanwhile, Jack Pfefer has been sent to la-la-land and XPW Remixed operates tonight with a chief authority figure on premises!!
** CUT **
_______________________________________________________________
"A tag team Dream Match turns into a NIGHTMARE"
D-VON DUDLEY (on the LOD‘s claims of copyright infringement and other “we made you“ big talk): We know we have the rights. So they can sit there and say that all they want. Are we going to fight them? You're damn right we are. They're trying to keep something that's not theirs. They didn't make us. We were making money way before we even got to them (in Extreme Championship Wrestling). In my opinion, they're just trying to be bullies. They say it's business. It ain't business. They're trying to stop someone from making a living.
BUBBA RAY DUDLEY: In the Bible, it says 'God created man in his image… They (Road Warriors) didn't know what to do with us. Me and Devon still have so much more to give. And that's why we're happy XPW Remixed is around because XPW Remixed knows how important tag team wrestling is. They invest time in tag team wrestling. People like tag team wrestling. It's very entertaining, and when done the right way, can be more entertaining than singles wrestling.
D-VON DUDLEY: XPW Remixed giving me what I've been longing for the past year… And that is wrestling on a wrestling show. WWE wants to make their wrestlers into actors -- but we're wrestlers. XPW Remixed gives us non-stop action. They don't put on a whole bunch of talk, and that's one thing that I like about XPW Remixed…
** CUT **
The Road Warriors (Hawk & Animal) offer their retort - and promise victory when they meet the Dudley Boyz in their championship match @ "AHiH"!!
** XPW Remixed Tag Team titles **
Dudley Boyz (2009) © versus Road Warriors (1991)
Only at "Another Halloween in Hell"!!
** CUT **
___________________________________________________________________
”Return of the STRANGLER”
It came from the bowels of fantasy wrestling hell. The greatest, most powerful heel in the history of organized grappling. A force said to be so devastating, it could literally signify the very END of XPW Remixed as we know it. Even VP Toots Mondt stood fearfully opposed, but Lewis has ordered obedience. This movement unleashed by Lewis is akin to VKM Jr letting the “poison” of N.W.O. into his precious WWF (2002ish). Once you believe... you die.
Intrepid backstage correspondent MSD has been sent to witness the announcement first hand. The address and the cameras have been given is a small, rustic barn in a dark deserted area of Nekoosa Wisconsin, that has been converted into a training gym (w/ ring). Inside this enclave (surrounded by bales of hay and all), there is a sparring session going on in the ring. Few other men gather round the ringside area - watching (picture The Ultimate Fighter TV Show - with fights being attended and viewed by coach, staff and training partners only. One of those men is XPW Remixed VP Joseph “Toots” Mondt - who is furiously shouting instructions to the participants in the ring. It’s still dark and hazy, with thick clouds of cigar smoke hanging in the air - but you can start to make out the two participants - locked in mortal struggle…
DINO BRAVO versus… STRANGLER LEWIS
versus
It is none other than XPW Remixed president STRANGLER LEWIS himself! Matched in size, stature and strength wise by GDT associate (and Toots Mondt henchman) Dino Bravo! The French Canadian strongman seems to be struggling mightily with some of Strangler Lewis’ clinch work - and the man Mondt is yelling counters and instructions to is Bravo. He’s telling Dino to “go for it!” but Strangler Lewis has expert defensive strategy. Bravo just can’t get a real grip on Lewis, and is constantly floored with side headlock takeovers. You can get the sense that this *sparring* match has escalated beyond that - specifically at Lewis urging, as he locks Bravo in a vicious Dragon Sleeper hold. Mondt implores Bravo to resist - but soon enough the strongman is tapping out! But… Lewis doesn’t release the hold! Matter of fact he holds it on *TIGHT* despite Bravo’s frantic tapping and flailing until Bravo’s body goes cold and limp in his grip! Everybody watches on silently as a fury, anger and sick perverse pleasure can be read upon the Strangler’s face as he releases his victim. Toots Mondt just watches on silently, before entering the ring… and holding Lewis’ arms aloft in victory!
Winner (by submission): STRANGLER LEWIS
Ladies & gentleman - you are witnessing fantasy wrestling HISTORY. Rewatch the above promo for “Apparition”. It’s supposed to serve as a correlation between our minds - madness - and this thing called “fantasy wrestling” (aka “XPW Remixed”). Once you believe - you die. The monster that is being unleashed upon is now is by far the worst scourge of it’s kind. The smothering, stifling, all-encompassing kind of evil that will reclaim the crown for GDT Inc - eliminate the enemy - and take back fantasy wrestling with his own bare hands.
This is the return of STRANGLER LEWIS!
Check out that photo above. See anything strange? I see the literal face of DEATH staring back at us. The skull that can be seen in the smokey photography of that era. Up by the wall - watching down upon the Strangler - staring back at US. Once you believe - you die.
Behold, Mash-Up Wrestling - your worst nightmare.
STRANGLER LEWIS is BACK!
Once you believe - you die. The Strangler's competitive fires have been stoked - and so he's raised the stakes of the co-main event tag team match tonight between Thesz/Sammartino vs Joe/Gunner... the winner of that tag team bout will get to choose the opponent for Stranglers DEBUT match... scheduled to take place on the NEXT XPW TV EPISODE! Oh my this is *HUGE BREAKING NEWS*! Strangler Lewis is back! His debut takes place NEXT WEEK on XPW TV! And the winner of tonight's tag team bout gets to choose his opponent!*
* (But only if that choice is unanimous between both partners)
** CUT **
_____________________________________________________________________
”TRUSTBUSTERS” (Thesz & Sammartino)
versus
“TRUTH N ANARCHY 2012” (Samoa Joe & Gunner w/ Jessica Darlin)
vs. w/
Vignettes ran all night with each of the men getting re-acquainted with each other. Thesz & Bruno share a recent victory together, but one never truly knows if they are on the same page. Same for Samoa Joe, who walks in on partner Gunner & Darlin in the midst of another vicious argument/domestic dispute. The animosity and intensity between the two men is palpable, but they each share an unwavering desire to crush their enemies and see them tremble at their feet. When the bombshell Strangler Lewis return and announcement was made, it changed the complexion of the match considerably - and raised the stock. Now each man desires a victory even more, with the ability to single-handily shut down (or dominate) the company with the right moves just in reach. In action, the futuristic TNA tandem of Joe & Gunner bring the pain - and Thesz playing face-in-peril. Jessica Darlin raises the slut and sleaze quotient, while serving as a potent distraction for the fans (and indignant Sammartino). But per usual - it is her man Gunner who gets caught up in the mix. Match breakdown with Sammartino & Thesz unleashing their arsenals hold-by-hold and move-by-move, while timing works with them to keep the bad guys isolated and discombobulated. Gunner blows up on Jessica Darlin again, allowing for a Thesz missile dropkick into a Bruno belly-to-back suplex with a bridge for 3. Samoa Joe had bailed on his overmatched partner once again - stewing in in his anger - and even more motivated to finish Thesz once and for all @ “AHiH”. Meanwhile, Bruno & Thesz go face to face again as Sammartino’s intentions remain crystal clear (he wants *HIS* belt back!) They must get it together now one more time to determine Strangler Lewis’ debut opponent next week on XPW TV!!
Winners: THESZ © & SAMMARTINO
Jessica Darlin leaves Gunner stranded again - and the muscle-bound freak tearing his hair out in frustration...
_________________________________________________________________
JOHN CENA (2012) versus TAZ (2000)
II
versus
Another match with video vignettes throughout the night - illustrating their mutual hatred and covering the events of their first match. MA-area referee Danny Davis tried appealing to Cena on a personal level to explain his last minute “heroic” decision to finish the match (after Cena knocked out the first official). But Cena clearly saw through him and pulled his card. Taz meanwhile continued to rage against the machine (Davis not officially licensed referee - it’s a conspiracy against Taz etc…) and hit some really low blows on Cena by ragging on him hard about his booing fan base. Tonight the path of rage turns the hallowed XPW Remixed arena into a crime scene! Win if you can! Survive if I LET YOU! On commentary, the lone Gordon Solie alludes to the XPW Remixed twitter and social networks going wild with speculation pitting either John Cena OR Taz against Strangler Lewis in his debut! Pure wrestling dream match nirvana either way...
Big match walkouts (HUGE boos for Cena, who walks out unflinching head down - hat brim over his eyes) and cheers for Taz. Match itself is a stiff continuation of their first encounter - with both men going back and forth, spilling outside where rowdy fans closed in around them. They fight through commercial break and fight. At the end Taz reverses an FUAA attempt into a Tazmission - but loses his position and gets locked in Cena’s STFU in return! Taz literally grabs the refs pants, belt and shirt down to desperately drag and claw himself to a rope break. When he finally does get the call - he responds by angrily berating - then SLUGGING - the referee! One more brief exchange between Cena & the Human Suplex Machine leaves Taz flat on his back with a match-ending FUAA! Cena covers him for the count… and once again referee Danny Davis slides into the ring to match the save (because the original ref is still out cold)! 1!.. 2!.. Cena breaks the count - grabs Davis up - and FUAA’s him right in the middle of the ring! Crowd POPS (??) for that move big time! Another series of match-ending moves between Taz & Cena, this time climaxing with Cena TRAPPED in the Tazmission once and for all! But now, scattered pockets of fans have begun chanting FOR Cena (and against Taz’s deliberate, slowdown, fan antagonistic style this match)! Cena powers out of the hold - manages a superhuman comeback - before finishing with an emotional FUAA. He falls, near exhausted, onto Taz body just as the original referee is crawling into place! 1!.. … 2!.. … 3!! Crowd explodes! Then starts slowly trailing off into loud boos… but the battered (slightly bloodied) Cena has survived the path of rage! Not only that, he thrived and emerged victorious! Hustle, loyalty, respect! Rise above hate!
Winner: JOHN CENA
Post match - run in and gangland beat down by the MOVEMENT! Led by Rashad Cameron, the goon squad of 5 men roll on da champ John Cena (aka the “ignorant wigger white boy poseur”) and stomp his West Newbury Mass Ass into jelly. Cryme Tyme 2.0 gets off it’s Total Elimination-like finisher - and Sabian is about to crush Cena’s head with a steel chair stomp - when the good guy cavalry finally rolls in.
Guys like Sammartino, Severn, Kimura, Younger (w/ Kendo sticks) and the champ LOU THESZ all make the heroic run-in and save - driving the thuggish assailants backstage and out of the picture. Thesz and stable regain control of the ring and crowd, and the champion has a few words on the mic. He announces their hand-chosen opponent next week for Strangler Lewis debut. A purists paradise and true fantasy wrestling dream match for the eons: that opponent will be DAN “the Beast” SEVERN (1998)!!
Fans seem receptive to the choice… arm chair quarterbacks wonder if it will turn into another Severn/Shamrock bore fest - purists go ballistic - and Sammartino hangs in the background like it’s not *100%* his first pick. Cena has recovered enough to respond, but it's not enthusiastically. He appears to confront XPW World champion Thesz like *HE* wanted that shot against Strangler... But regardless - it’s done - and next week on XPW TV - Strangler Lewis will debut against shooters club ace DAN SEVERN!! Meanwhile Samoa Joe watches on silently from the entrance ramp (while being held back by security) - starring daggers through XPW Remixed WORLD champion Lou Thesz...
** Bodycount for the evening **
** MATT STRIKER: Hospitalized by Kilo (broadcast partner Gordon Solie stricken by fear & anger)
** JACK PFEFER: Brogue kicked by Sheamus after conspiring to screw him out of the XPW Remixed Boston title.
** LIZZY BORDEN: Previous injuries exxxacerbated by Mildred Burke shoot submission.
** DINO BRAVO: Had to be revived twice after deadly Strangle hold.
** DANNY DAVIS: FUAA by an irate John Cena!! Madness, chaos and anarchy has gripped XPW Remixed! And now the President himself is back in the mix! Stay tuned as the road to "Another Halloween in Hell" continues!!
Next Week on XPW TV Episode #58...
STRANGLER LEWIS (debut) vs DAN SEVERN!!
PLUS!!
More fantasy wrestling DREAM MATCHES abound!!
XPW Remixed Womans champion SABLE defends against TRISH STRATUS!
**NEW (?!?!)** XPW Remixed Boston champion DEAN AMBROSE!!
The 2nd stipulation of this years "Xtreme Elimination Chamber"!!
STAY TUNED!!
** FADE OUT **
_________________________________________________________________
** XPW World Championship **
Lou Thesz © versus Samoa Joe
II
("Iron Man Match")
** Xtreme Elimination Chamber **
feat: SHEIK... SNUFF... SAMI CALLIHAN... POGO the CLOWN... & more!!
** XPW TV title tourney FINALS **
** XPW Remixed Tag Team titles **
Dudley Boyz (2009) © versus Road Warriors (1991)
** King of the Death Match title **
Kilo © versus MESSIAH
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CREDITS:
DUDLEY BOYZ: News channel interview